![[Seth Says] Never Remember](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20Never%20Remember&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-09-19&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] Never Remember
Q: Why is having Alzheimer's like being John Wayne Bobbit?A: I can't remember. It's been a pretty forgetty ("top 10 least popular drag queen names") week for...
![[Seth Says] Simonized For Your Protection](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20Simonized%20For%20Your%20Protection&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-09-04&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] Simonized For Your Protection
Q: How did angry Garfunkel fans describe Paul Simon's first solo album?A: Ap-paul-lingly Art-less It's Paul Simon week here at Seth Says, mainly because my...
![[Seth Says] Time is Money](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20Time%20is%20Money&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-08-22&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] Time is Money
Q: Where do you buy used watch parts?A: A second-hand store. People say "time is on our side," but more accurately it used to be on people's wrists. In the...
![[Seth Says] You Can't Always Get What You Quant](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20You%20Can%27t%20Always%20Get%20What%20You%20Quant&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-08-08&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] You Can't Always Get What You Quant
Q: Why do people read Slaughterhouse-Five?A: Because they Vonnegut book. This week's newsletter will be slightly Kurt because I have been slightly busy....
![[Seth Says] You Are The 1%](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20You%20Are%20The%201%25&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-07-25&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] You Are The 1%
Q: What does a book's back cover sound like if you read it out loud underwater?A: Blurb Blurb Blurb! Reading is cool and fun and good, even though reading...
![[Seth Says] Less Is More](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20Less%20Is%20More&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-07-10&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] Less Is More
Q: Is it a problem if I keep a library book until it's overdue?A: It's fine. The other night I managed to wean (I'm a weanie!) myself away from my computer,...
![[Seth Says] Really Good, Fakey Good](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20Really%20Good%2C%20Fakey%20Good&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-06-27&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] Really Good, Fakey Good
Q: Why don't baritones wear dentures?A: Because that's a falsetto teeth. If you think that joke bites, you're not alone. (Quick, look behind you!) No doubt...
![[Seth Says] Revel In Thy Weirditude!](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20Revel%20In%20Thy%20Weirditude%21&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-06-13&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] Revel In Thy Weirditude!
"How'd your date go with the quantum physicist?""I was hoping she'd be charmed, but she just thought I was strange." I was considering starting this...
![[Seth Says] Welcome To The Fold](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20Welcome%20To%20The%20Fold&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-05-30&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] Welcome To The Fold
Q: Why did the negotiator's wife divorce him?A: She caught him in a compromising position. There are many reasons you shouldn't take relationship advice from...
![[Seth Says] Comedy Is Back!](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20Comedy%20Is%20Back%21&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-05-16&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] Comedy Is Back!
Q: Who is Boston's most famous stand-up comedy hobbit?A: Bill Burr Baggins "Gandalf was a great man! A great man! Dude is a forgetful wizard with a pipe weed...
![[Seth Says] Bear and Grin It](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20Bear%20and%20Grin%20It&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-05-02&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] Bear and Grin It
So a bear walks into a bar and says, "I would like... ...a beer."And the bartender says, "Why the big pause?"And the bear says, "I was born with them." Not...
![[Seth Says] A Sorry State of Affairs](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20A%20Sorry%20State%20of%20Affairs&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-04-17&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] A Sorry State of Affairs
Q: What's the difference between a model Canadian and an art model in India? A: One freezes in their Sorry's, the other wears saris in their friezes. The...
![[Seth Says] April Showers...](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20April%20Showers...&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-04-04&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] April Showers...
...make you smell less. (although if you are experiencing anosmia, it may be a sign of covid.)(if you are experiencing a murder, it may be a sign of...
![[Seth Says] A Stand-Up Confidence Trick](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20A%20Stand-Up%20Confidence%20Trick&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-03-21&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] A Stand-Up Confidence Trick
![[Seth Says] Book Before You Leap](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20Book%20Before%20You%20Leap&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-03-06&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] Book Before You Leap
Q: What do you do when a war criminal walks into a library?A: Throw the book at them. I trust you will join me in a collective...
![[Seth Says] Good, Evil, and Nonsense](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20Good%2C%20Evil%2C%20and%20Nonsense&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-02-20&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] Good, Evil, and Nonsense
Q: Why does a pianist always have his piano in black and white?A: Because he's a man a'keyin'! I'm not normally given to a Manichean worldview because life...
![[Seth Says] In Which I Am Wrong](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20In%20Which%20I%20Am%20Wrong&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-02-06&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] In Which I Am Wrong
Q: Where do you research how not to cock things up with a typo?A: At the pubic library. They can't all be good. ("Was this building designed by Frank Lloyd...
![[Seth Says] Can't Stick the Landing](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20Can%27t%20Stick%20the%20Landing&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-01-24&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] Can't Stick the Landing
Q: Why do Cindy Crawford's flights never take off?A: Because she's a runway model. I suspect there are more current, younger supermodels these days (probably...
![[Seth Says] Unfortunately, Sex](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20Unfortunately%2C%20Sex&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2026-01-09&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] Unfortunately, Sex
A friend of mine announced last month that she was getting engaged to a wheel of brie. I've loved brie for ages, but I was respectful and avoided suggesting...
![[Seth Says] Son of Sham(wow)](https://image-generator.buttondown.email/api/emphasize-subject?subject=%5BSeth%20Says%5D%20Son%20of%20Sham%28wow%29&author=Seth%20Says%20%28Parenthetical%20Digressions%29&date=2025-12-27&img=https%3A//assets.buttondown.email/images/49c5c16f-3d7c-4119-a857-8903ae11306b.jpg)
[Seth Says] Son of Sham(wow)
Q: Has anyone actually captured an abominable snowman on film?A: Not yeti! Since I already offered sage advice last issue, I didn't want to pepper in too...