What's working is starting each day with a gratitude rampage, delivering said GR in a pissed-off voice when I'm not feeling it, laughing at myself, admitting when I'm a "bitter melon" about something (like people who fall apart in a crisis) and that it's jealousy and 180° from jealousy I'll find the real desire, honesty honesty honesty honesty, No Spend November (supported by Cody Cook-Parrott in a Discord group with others called Object Study), being silly in love with my honey, my cats, and our piebald ball python, the maximum dose of infusion meds beating pain down from a very spicy 7.5 to a perfectly manageable 5-6, making small art with pieces of Pearl's (the snake) shed skin, and wearing a mirror necklace to reflect negative and excessive energy and protect my peace and clarity.

What's working for me lately is checking in with myself + my body, listening to my people when they're giving loving guidance, vegan lasagna & days of leftovers, & lots of audiobook and lemon cake on the switch time!

I'm rewatching Call the Midwife. There's a new season out, but I started all the way back at episode 1 and am making my way towards the new stuff. This is excellent before-bed tv viewing - nothing that will find it's way into nightmares.

I started temp'ing full-time and I'm a) so thankful for the work and income in these times and b) really enjoying the routine of it.

Reading books that are simple and have lessons to learn from, especially around simplicity and peace in life. My current read is called "A Prayer for the Crown-Shy" by Becky Chambers. It's the second book in her Monk and Robot book series. They both give me so much simple and pure joy.

Also, therapy ... therapy is working.

Sending you all the healing vibes, Nic!

What's working for me!

Wearing an actual watch so I don't have to look at my phone every time I want to know the time, signing up for the autumn / winter CSA not just the summer one - I'm learning to cook so many new things and it really forces me to eat seasonally, air fryer tofu like 3 times a week, giving kids an option of clementines and string cheese (in addition to a candy option) for Halloween, FINALLY getting a primary care doctor, using Jess Craven's call prompts multiple times a week, cinnamon tea, using a non-app based pedometer to get in enough movement.

Ooh I am making this pumpkin pasta recipe tonight!

I love this! What's working for me is getting tickets to see Brandi Carlile and Florance & The Machine in concert, donating to my local food bank and taking steps to change what isn't working for me. This isn't easy and it's not immediate, but I can sometimes forget I'm not trapped. Making a plan and taking steps toward change gives me hope and sustains me through challenges.

What's working: boundary setting! I have found myself in an absolutely wild ongoing work-adjacent scenario these last few weeks, and I've been able to advocate for myself and also be very clear on what I do/do not have the capacity for. A big development for a former people-pleaser.

Making batches of chocolate chip and walnut cookies for now and for the freezer (honestly, nothing better than fancying a chocolate chip cookie... and realising you can have one in hand less than half an hour later? it's SO satisfying! Tara O'Brady's chocolate chip recipe is my go-to, for anyone curious)

What's working for me: setting small for me running goals; being patient with my pendulum style thoughts, reading good books (just read What Kind of Paradise and Alchemy of Secrets...both were good!); baking cookies for the freezer; oh and all the snuggly things...my dog, fluffy blankets, sweatpants and warm socks!

I’m coming to you from India where hubs and I are for the first two weeks of November visiting family. What’s working for me: being gentle with myself as I navigate nuanced family dynamics; listening (and giving myself permission not to listen with compassion or understanding or empathy; that just the act of listening can be a good start); honoring and praising and working with my 61-year-old body as it copes with jet lag; allowing my energy (instead of my mouth) to do the talking. Also the yummiest of local Indian food; the warmth and care of folks here; the simple and heart-nourishing daily interactions with regular folk; playing with the cutest beagle Bella.

Also: the thrift store. I found a great one here in northern virginia and have been building my work clothes wardrobe back up without breaking the bank. And I get a 20% off coupon when I donate, which is encouraging me to keep my closet in order and release the stuff I'm holding onto just in case.

I am also feeling called to use what I have, especially with things like craft supplies and food in the pantry. I think there’s a little bit of holiday dread associated with people giving us more STUFF, particularly for our kids, but I’m still pondering what kinds of asks or boundaries feel reasonable and will be respected. If anyone has hot tips on this, please let me know! I also decided this month is no scroll November. I always struggle with giving up Instagram entirely because I do genuinely miss things people share and I talk a fair amount with out of friends there. Then I journaled and realized if I only stick to stories and DMs, I really don’t get sucked in. I just don’t scroll down! It’s like back in the day when Facebook (or MySpace) would just show you what your friends posted and you could get caught up. If only we’d known how good we had it.

As a lover of crunchy leaves, "potato chips for the feet" made me laugh out loud! That's amazing. Curious: how do you get better at reading the books you already have? It's been a goal of mine for the last few years and I am still struggling with it. But your commitment to it is encouraging...Regarding everything happening with SNAP - which I am also in a simmering rage about - in my neighborhood Buy Nothing Group people who are able to are offering to pay for the groceries of people who need some extra help. I am a big fan of this form of direct redistribution and community care, so passing on the idea to others.

I've often rolled my eyes at "gratitude practice", but for the past month I've spent 10 minutes every morning writing down things I'm grateful for and I think it's actually changing my brain. So.

Also: daily journal prompts from Suleika Jaouad's "Book of Alchemy", reviving my sourdough starter after its summer hibernation, following a weight training program rather than winging it, using the adorable Focus Friend app to stay off my phone, reading in the tub with candles and a little book light. Also, getting very into baseball during the Jays' World Series run and enjoying the feeling of being part of something, while texting my family questions about pitches and strategies.

Jealous you can still use your flannel sheets - perimenopause has made them way to hot for me. :( Lol, I write as I sit with my space heater blasting me from inches away.

LOVED Hunting Wives. Currently enjoying Boots on Netflix about gays in the military in the 90s - the last show that the legendary Norman Mailer worked on before he died. And the Real Housewives of SLC are killing it - the best in the game. What's also working: going to the movies solo and trying to see all the movies that are likely to get an Oscar nom this year (One Battle After Another!!!!!!!!); using the "fall back" time switch as a lil reset; fall scented candles; easing back into Peloton rides; taking a grief workshop to start exploring my interest in death doula work.

What’s working: homemade baguettes, The Seth Meyers and Lonely Island Podcast (start from the beginning), and making an Airtable for my home admin tasks for my baby ADHD brain that can’t remember a goddamn thing.

Also: Olivia Dean’s new album.