"because of course I can’t let you go without something more collapse-y" - I so appreciate that this is it's own genre now haha.

Also yay my library has Enshittification so I don't have to alraedy break my book buying limit!

What's working for me: making ridiculously detailed to do lists each day so I can check lots of things off, adjusting my daughter's bedtime later so she sleeps better, catching up on Nobody Wants This, starting going to the gym again after years away, weaving in more ritual and sacred practices into my life again, actually taking my supplements, eating protein in the morning, drinking more water, listening to more fun podcasts rather than always having to educate myself, making lists of books I want to read and movies I want to watch and feeling the anticipatory excitement of that, getting at least one proper date night a month on the calendar, going for a quick daily walk, rolling out my IT band even though it hurts so much, being really present more often with my daughter.

First, a recommendation: Nic, your first podcast rec reminded me of an episode of Martha Beck and Rowan Mangan's podcast Bewildered from December 2025 called "I Want to be the Person Who." Instead of showing you how to be that person, though, they walk through whether or not you REALLY want to be that person. It gave me a lot of food for thought last week, and I highly recommend it!

Now: What's Working (2-Months-Post-Unexpected-Divorce Edition)

Taking my dog on 4x walks a day, even in the rain. Allowing myself to just have hard days when they come up, because probably the next day will be better. Tea--literally all the time, all the tea. Inner child work. Melody Beattie's Codependency No More. Heated Rivalry. Trying out bubble baths for the first time in like 30 years and kinda digging them. Doing whatever the fuck I want. Finally admitting that I hate to cook and just allowing myself to... not? Being kind to myself. Watching Heated Rivalry AGAIN. Talking to strangers on the internet about their own divorce experiences and not feeling so alone. Laying on the couch and reading smutty romance novels all evening instead of ever turning on the TV. Reminding myself that I don't have to run out and join the dating apps just because my ex found someone a month later, and knowing that I'd rather work on myself and enjoy just being alone for a while.

Not me screaming "that's my best friend!!!!" about the Dirtbag Diaries episode 😁 This made me so happy to see, thank you Nic!

I "creatively composted" a podcast I co-hosted, but Katie was our first guest. If anyone else liked the Dirtbag episode you can hear what she's been up to since: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/from-6-figure-job-to-bartending-in-the-polar-world-to/id1709156557?i=1000701889788

Sundubu paste and therefore the ability to make soft tofu soup anytime, not having to buy the pre-made packets anymore! (This recipe, with mushrooms: https://futuredish.com/korean-sundubu-paste-make-jjigae-in-5-min/ ) And I am absolutely obsessed with the Sesame Miso Dressing from the cookbook Good Things by Samin Nosrat, which I’m really enjoying cooking from – highly recommend both recipe and book! I’ve made a slightly modified version of this so many times this fall/winter, putting it on kale, arugula, or shredded cabbage. Here’s the recipe, rewritten as I make it, with notes at the end about the original.

• 1/4 c lemon juice
• 1/4 c seasoned rice vinegar
• 3 Tbsp white miso (big scoops, not flattened)
• 2 Tbsp honey
• 2 tsp toasted sesame oil
• 3 - 6 garlic cloves, thinly sliced
• 1 (3-inch) piece fresh ginger, peeled and thinly sliced

• 1/2 c neutral oil
• Kosher salt

Put everything except the oil and salt in a wide-mouth jar and immersion blend to blend until smooth. With the immersion blender running, very slowly add the neutral oil. Taste and adjust with salt.

I use “good” bottled lemon juice, Santa Cruz brand, in the glass bottle you can keep in the fridge after opening, instead of juicing lemons as the original recipe calls for. It also includes 5 Tbsp miso, six garlic cloves, and 1 fresh jalapeño, stemmed (seeded if desired) and sliced. (Recipe says you can use a countertop blender if you don’t have an immersion blender, I haven't tried it.)

You got me back to Dirtbag Diaries. And the episode that transformed my life. “Knees & Weather Permitting.” At the time of first listen, I was on my first long hike of the Pacific Northwest Trail & fully understood the new found freedom of ‘carrying my house on my back.’ I came back from that hike with a determination to change my life from urban Seattle city worker. I wanted to live differently. I wanted a lifestyle that would support me taking big chunks of time away, for future treks. Currently, I am living that life. Romping around Anza Borrego desert, with a small home & housemate back in Anchorage, Alaska. I work in the trades now, as a carpenter & casual laborer with unions. I keep it simple. I share. I do my own work when possible, which includes, most importantly, preparing my own food. This is what’s working for me. To focus on thinking about & daily living the solutions. To live & let live. To live the life I need & want & desire.

Your blog & ideas & community help support me in these pursuits.

The other thing that helps me: KEXP & especially John Richards.

Thank you, from near Borrego Springs.

I loved Nothing to Lose. The way he ran those downhill stretches. So impressive!

What's working -

The 30 Day Journaling challenge hosted by Sulieka Jaouad/The Isolation Journals. Returning to running after a holiday break. Starting my gym membership again and taking advantage of the new year exercise energy. Coffee dates with friends. Accepting that winter where I live is gray and it won't last forever. Seeing how happy my dog is on walks. Soft comfy clothes.

What's working for me is taking the new year slow - I like to use it as a milepost for self-reflection and planning, but historically I've put a lot of pressure on doing it "right" and having it all wrapped by Jan 1. This year I'm slowly sorting through your word of the year workbook and my Live Your Values deck and journaling and it feels good to just sit with everything and recognize that there's a long year ahead of me.

Other things - doing more active meal planning again, with a focus on whole grains. Good quality decaf black tea. Saying yes to more social opportunities. Long, slow morning dog walks. Being a subscriber here again! Letting myself have a bunch of crafts going at once that I can switch between as I feel the urge.

DUde, this list is awesome. You are one of my favorites. Thank you. :)

What's working for me is sweet potato, oatmeal, coconut yogurt, and walnuts for breakfast. Observing and noticing as a practice instead of self-surveillance. Picking identities for 2026 like: poet, backpacker, and musician. Trying new things like contact improv and pop up chorus.

Reading books like 1929, Careless People, and Paper Girl. Digging into social security as a podcast series and being willing to not have answers but ask questions.

Crunchy cabbage slaw with shredded chicken (from Good Things Samin Nosrat) and ginger seltzer (Whole Foods brand) to drink.

Walks at the golden hour at the Eno River. Landman! Rewatching The Closer. Knitting and sewing. Cutting up a sweater I never wear and reworking it into something I will wear. Investigating crewel work.

Looking forward to watching Nothing Left to Lose. Reminds me of watching The Barkley Marathons! I love watching people do things. Oh! Also the latest Chef's Table.

I'm pretty sure that's the podcast episode where she gets invited on a Grand Canyon rafting trip from a tinder match and then I decided I wanted that too and it actually kind of happened 😅

Also YES TO EVERYTHING HEATED RIVALRY 😍

Such a great list!

Coming into January, a few things working for me...

• doing a temp check/audit of the newsletters that enter my inbox and how the content makes me feel (ex. does this content feel aligned with my values, not just what I may think I "should" be consuming?), then unsubscribing where necessary.

• actually setting aside 7-10 minutes to do mobility work ahead of a workout, and generally slowing down and paying attention to the process versus pushing through to get it done. Applying that framework to other areas of life, too.

• being grateful that my elderly cat seems in reasonably good health and spirits at this moment, and consciously enjoying our time together while we have it <3

Yes to heated rivalry and the second book. My smut/romance reading seems to take off in December and January.

I just started art journaling again. I participated in an experiment called 12 holy nights where we received prompts + tarot cards to ease out of 2025 and into 2026. I thoroughly enjoyed it.

What’s working for me is hoodies. Did I say that last month? Still true. Listening to any audio book that Marin Ireland narrates - the one I just finished was The Golden Couple, so good. Doing JanYourStory on the website Memoir Nation. Deciding which recipe to do next from Six Seasons of Pasta (summer is broken into the three seasons and that totally makes sense). Jigsaw puzzles.

What’s working: (re)watching Stranger Things and then listening to super long podcast episodes about it; puzzle library / giving up on specific puzzles when they no longer feel fun; walks without headphones; batch-cooking always; tasks on post-its on my fridge; herbal teas (finally bought an electric kettle after 9 years without!); reading local guidebooks; deleting content from Instagram (I downloaded everything and I’m going through a little of the photos/writing before deleting. I’m so proud of past me for some of this stuff and while I’m not quite ready to quit IG it’s feeling good to let things go. It’s part of a larger effort of deleting accounts/content I no longer want in public spaces); going to a Capoeira intro course (highly recommend if you want to remember you have hamstrings lol).

I expect I will be watching Heated Rivalry once I slow down on Stranger Things. It’s been making the rounds in my friend groups. Really liked this article about sex and narrative, responding to people who are not familiar with the romance genre. https://readingtheend.com/2025/12/10/anatomy-of-a-sex-scene-heated-rivalry-edition/

I had read (what is assume is) the original article about enshittification. Devastating. The book is on my “I don’t want to do this to myself rn” list.

I’m obsessed with Chantel Chapman’s book Trauma of Money and think it should be required reading! https://www.thetraumaofmoney.com/trauma-of-money-book

So much goodness in here! I have had this bookmarked in my inbox so I wouldn't forget to share my podcast recs, so here we go: The Break-Up episode of This American Life....I've listened and re-listened and even taught it in classes before. It's heartwarming and thoughtful and clever and I love it so much!

Also, the one I wrote about recently, an episode of The Organist called "Give Everybody Everything" about Bernadette Mayer. Gorgeous and painful reflection on the life of a world famous poet who lived in poverty. (And her daydreams about how the world/economics could be different).

Several episodes of On Being are also on the relistenables list for me!

Thank you for this juicy roundup, much to dig into!