This past Saturday evening, Linda and I were getting ready to go out, and I couldn't find my glasses. Again.

I was rushing around the house, checking the same places I'd already searched half a dozen times. My frustration was growing, my pace quickening, my language getting saltier, and my self-talk getting meaner and more judgy.

Note: I'm guessing this sad little story sounds familiar to a few of you.

Somewhere in the middle of my angry frenzy, I caught myself and muttered a little dad-like pep talk: “You know, getting ticked off with yourself ain't helping you find your specs any faster there, Billy boy.”

Shortly afterward, I found myself thinking a little more flexibly. Instead of checking the same places yet again, I wondered if I'd left them in the car. I went outside and spotted them on the hood, where I'd left them earlier while doing some yard work.

Sometimes awareness arrives right in the middle of our own ridiculous meltdowns. That little moment of catching myself helped interrupt my frustration and gave me a chance to get unstuck.

And that's an important part of what I mean by calm in resilience. Not eliminating stress or uncomfortable feelings, but developing the ability to notice what's happening and respond with a little more flexibility.

Try this

Choose one ordinary moment in your day as a reminder to pause. Maybe it's waiting in line, sitting in traffic, or transitioning from one task to another. When that moment comes, instead of immediately reaching for your phone or rushing to the next thing, stop for a few seconds.

Feel your feet on the ground. Look around. Take a slow, easy breath. Notice what's happening inside you and around you. If you're holding tension somewhere, see if you can let a little of it soften.

For just a few moments, let yourself be right where you are. Nothing to fix or figure out.

And if you don't remember until afterward? That's part of the practice, too. Noticing afterward is how we begin learning to notice sooner.

We can't always choose our first reaction. But sometimes a few seconds of being present is all it takes to open up new possibilities for what happens next.