Welcome to the last Wavy Thoughts newsletter of 2024! This one is a self-indulgent one where I cosplay as a book reviewer and normal service will resume next week. If you don’t already subscribe, it’d be cool if you did…

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I went for many years without reading books because I was clinically depressed. There is nothing less attractive to a depressed me than a big bunch of dry words demanding to be not just read, but processed. My sad, sad brain wanted to be spoon-fed vibrant colour, flashing lights, and lots of short videos to fill the void. It didn’t want to imagine anything.

My history with reading and depression makes this year all the more sweeter. Somehow, despite the burnout I’ve written about previously, I managed to corral my braincells to focus long enough through 20 books. I’m honestly not sure what clicked, but it’s like reading has gone from crunchy to smooth. It used to feel painful, a chore. But it is as if my eyes are glazed in butter, gliding over words, completely locked in to the finish line.

Sounds a tad psychedelic, but I don’t imbibe anything stronger than Pepsi Max, I promise. Perhaps I have just picked better books this year. I’m probably over-thinking this (put that on my gravestone).

Let’s just say that it feels like I have starved myself of books for years and now I’m doing my best to guzzle them as quickly as I can.

Anyway, here’s the list of books I read, with a mini review of each. No star rating or marks out of 10. Every book is different.

Also, a side note. I don’t tend to buy new copies of books (money, innit). Each book on this list, with the exception of the audiobook, was found at a charity shop, or at my beloved local library. It’s one of life’s unique joys to scour shelf after shelf and finally stumble upon a book you have wanted for months. It’s also a fun mini-game to test out your keen pattern-spotting abilities.

Lastly, just to add my small voice to the sentiment - save local libraries, they are so precious.

Books I have read in 2024

1. Good Material - Dolly Alderton

   This book doesn’t really go anywhere and the main character is a massive wet blanket, but Dolly Alderton has that endearing way of writing with the perfect mix of humour and pathos. She also writes about millennial life with excruciating accuracy. It was a great book to ease myself back into reading.

2. I’m Glad My Mom Died - Jennette McCurdy

   I heard that the audio version was an even better experience because Jennette herself reads it out. This makes it all the more powerful. It is raw and deeply honest, as Jennette talks about her time as a child actor, her subsequent addiction to alcohol, and of course as the name suggests, the complex relationship she had with her abusive, domineering mother. I felt so deeply sad for her, and I hope she is in a better place now.

3. Prick Up Your Ears (A biography of Joe Orton) - John Lahr

   I knew that Joe Orton was seen as the next big thing in British playwriting in the 60s, but I did not know much about his life. Orton does not come off well here, and it’s no use saying ‘but it was a different time’. Had he have lived, he could well have been put in prison. The book is really well-written however and plonks you at the heart of 60s London. Just a shame that the subject was pretty vile.

4. The Year of Magical Thinking - Joan Didion

   I read this at the suggestion of the internet when I lost someone very close to me last year. Didion is one of those writers who lets you in just enough, but shields you from the big red line she has drawn at your feet. You cannot step over the big red line and into her private domain. However, despite Didion’s detached manner, this book is still a stark portrait of the madness you experience at the start of the grieving process. I have yet to read Blue Nights, which some view as the kind-of sequel. If I find it in the charity shop I’ll definitely give it a go.

5. Convenience Store Woman - Sayaka Murata

   Apparently Murata did not write this book with autism in mind. Yet, to me this is one of the best representations of an autistic woman I’ve read so far. It is extraordinary in places, the descriptions of the store making it appear as this living, breathing entity whom the main character loves so dearly. The main character finds comfort in the rhythms and routine of this life, yet her family and friends are baffled that she has ‘settled’ when she could have ‘more’, but she does not see it that way. I’ve read that Murata’s other books are not like this one at all and sit firmly in the genre of horror or fantasy. That’s a shame, because I want more of this.

6. Really Good, Actually - Monica Heisey

   I read an interview in the Guardian with Heisey and immediately wanted to buy the book. It explores divorce in your late twenties. Is it contrived in places? Yes, but then again show me a work of contemporary literary fiction that isn’t contrived in places. It is extremely funny and I’m excited to see if Heisey writes any more books in future.

7. Life Among the Savages - Shirley Jackson

   Shirley Jackson was a successful writer of horror stories in the 50s and 60s. This book however is a collection of her non-fiction essays around family life. I was expecting to read (and scoff at) a collection by a humourless trad wife, with a perfect family and white picket fence. Instead, I found myself laughing aloud at her exceptional dry wit and hilarious stories featuring her unhinged children.

8. Slaughterhouse Five - Kurt Vonnegut

   If you say ‘sci-fi’ to me, usually I’ll make a face like I’ve ate a lemon whole. This book may be classed as sci-fi, but really, it is genre-less. Vonnegut was astounding, writing about the tragedy of World War Two by weaving this tale of aliens and time travel. I am seriously considering becoming an absolutely basic literary bitch and getting ‘Everything was beautiful and nothing hurt’ tattooed on me. Who am I kidding, I already am a basic literary bitch.

9. Young Mungo - Douglas Stuart

   I read Shuggie Bain last year and had mega mixed feelings about it. The descriptions of desolate 1980s Glasgow, ruined by Thatcher, were incredible, yet it felt in parts like the reader was being fed gratuitous trauma purely for the shock factor. Young Mungo has a lot of traumatic elements to it, but they don’t feel shoe-horned in the way they did in Shuggie. This book is tender and beautiful.

10. Touching from a Distance - Deborah Curtis

    Joy Division were on the cusp of breaking America when Ian Curtis tragically chose to end his own life. His widow Deborah provides quite a matter of fact biography, with parts that are delivered with a heavy dose of anger (particularly around Curtis’ alleged affair with a music journalist).

11. Brick Lane - Monica Ali

    This book was quite successful when it was released in the early 00s, as it was seen as somewhat groundbreaking, focusing on the British-Bangladeshi community in London. Parts of it feel extremely stale 20 years on, and the characters don’t feel fully fleshed out.

12. The Man in the High Castle - Philip K Dick

    Off the back of my surprise with Slaughterhouse Five, I tried another highly rated sci-fi book, The Man in the High Castle. I didn’t enjoy this one as much. It ties a few separate stories together under one overarching storyline that isn’t clear until the end, but I found the pay off to be a bit weak. Just not my cup of tea.

13. Untypical - Pete Wharmby

    An exceptional book about autism by one of the best autistic advocates around at the moment. Wharmby writes in a very matter of fact style and he pulls no punches when it comes to dispelling the myths that persist around autism. I’m looking forward to reading more of his books.

14. My Year of Rest and Relaxation - Ottessa Moshfegh

    When I read the reviews for this one it was like I’d looked up customer reviews for Marmite. Personally, I loved it, it’s very silly, tongue firmly in cheek during some parts, and also very moving in places. Moshfegh is on Substack and I’m a follower! Hoping to find more of her books in the library.

15. On Connection - Kae Tempest

    Poet Kae Tempest came out as non-binary a few years ago and is a particular inspiration to me. I watched a documentary they made with the BBC and immediately feel down a mini-special interest rabbit hole for a few weeks. This beautiful book, written during lockdown, explores connection with other humans. It’s stunning.

16. Why Be Happy When You Could Be Normal? - Jeanette Winterson

    Winterson is a tutor of Creative Writing and I’ve always toyed with the idea of enrolling on her course, purely to meet her and have her read and critique my work. This book is sort-of the non-fiction version of her masterpiece ‘Oranges are Not the Only Fruit’. It is vivid, witty and a punch in the gut, all rolled into one.

17. The Sun Also Rises - Ernest Hemingway

    At first I thought this book’s alternative title could be ‘Smoking and Drinking in Paris with My Cool Friends’. But then in the latter half of the book it opens up into beautiful prose. Ambiguity is abundant here. I love that Hemingway wrote a character who plays with gender expression and norms. Considering it was his debut novel, it’s really impressive.

18. The Electricity of Every Living Thing - Katherine May

    This book had me doing my best nodding dog impression all the way through. Relate, relate, relate, relate. Any more nodding and my head would have rolled off my shoulders. An affirming book about self-discovery, autism (yay!) and the magic of walking. It is sublime in places. I’m really hoping to find a copy of Wintering or Enchantment in a charity shop this year!

19. Delicacy - Katy Wix

    This book promised so much. Essays about both grief and cake written by an autistic comedian - wow, perfect. Some of the essays are brilliant, but sadly I think the cake theme almost held Wix hostage. More than once you’re presented with an essay written with great care and sensitivity, beautifully constructed and perfectly-pitched, to then be confronted with a surprise Battenberg shoved into the scene for no real reason other than that’s the theme.

20. No One is Talking About This - Patricia Lockwood

    As someone who used to be Extremely Online™, I related perhaps a bit too much to the first half of this book. If you are familiar with that world from a few years ago when Twitter was at its height, you will appreciate the accuracy of Lockwood’s writing. I found it to be so full of laughs, that the second half hit me square in the face. The topic and tone shift come out of nowhere. It’s impactful and weird. I enjoyed it a great deal.

I wonder how many books I can read in 2025? I won’t set a goal because I’ll see it as a demand and go off and sulk somewhere for 365 days. So instead, I’ll just see what happens and enjoy the process. If you like, let me know what you have been reading in the comments.

Until next time,

Ren

P.S. If you like my writing, please do consider becoming a paid subscriber, or tip me. I appreciate your support. See you in 2025!