Okay so this could be an entire essay of its own (this is a question that has been on my mind SO much lately, in multiple ways), so I'll try for a semi-concise answer.
When Paul and I got divorced in 2019 one part of that decision was because I wanted to live a different, much more nomadic and adventure/hiking focused life. (Obviously there were multiple other reasons too, but that was definitely one aspect of it.) I did so much to set my life up for that exact thing afterward, but then covid happened and my collapse-awareness deepened and I started to feel like I was living with two different people inside of me: one who wanted that big hiker life and one who wanted to root down somewhere for the long-term and live what Carmen Spagnola calls a "small and delicious life".
Then in early 2022, Gent and I were given the opportunity to live in our current house, which his dad owns and for which we don't have to pay rent/mortgage. As you can imagine that felt like an un-turn-down-able opportunity, and I'm truly so grateful for the way it has changed my financial enoughness math and the feeling of security re: staying housed. But. But! The truth is that I don't love where we live (the town/area/landscape/community I mean — the house/land itself is wonderful) and so it's a constant low-grade struggle for me to know that I'd ideally rather be in a tiny cabin in the mountains somewhere and/or longterm hiking vs in this specific place, while also fully grasping that in so many ways this is the most supportive situation I/we could be in in a collapsing world.
The main complicating factor of all this when it comes to long-distance hiking is that the thing that makes me happiest here at home is the animals (dogs, sheep, chickies) and yet the care they need in my/our absence makes leaving for extended time really tough. Another factor was Gent's spinal injury back in autumn 2023, from which he still feels daily pain/discomfort, and so backpacking together hasn't been an option since then (and is something we looove to do together, and is how we initially met!)
The last thing I'll say, which feels particularly poignant right now, is that the combo of double parental death plus the frightening acceleration of collapse (energy/resource crisis, impending super El Nino, possible AMOC shutdown etc) makes me feel way more urgently "yolo" than I have ever felt before. So I've been confronting the feeling of "BETTER DO YOUR FAVORITE/DREAM HIKES NOW BEFORE YOU CAN NEVER DO THEM AGAIN" while also feeling the craving to root down even more at home and that all feels... yeah.
Okay so this could be an entire essay of its own (this is a question that has been on my mind SO much lately, in multiple ways), so I'll try for a semi-concise answer.
When Paul and I got divorced in 2019 one part of that decision was because I wanted to live a different, much more nomadic and adventure/hiking focused life. (Obviously there were multiple other reasons too, but that was definitely one aspect of it.) I did so much to set my life up for that exact thing afterward, but then covid happened and my collapse-awareness deepened and I started to feel like I was living with two different people inside of me: one who wanted that big hiker life and one who wanted to root down somewhere for the long-term and live what Carmen Spagnola calls a "small and delicious life".
Then in early 2022, Gent and I were given the opportunity to live in our current house, which his dad owns and for which we don't have to pay rent/mortgage. As you can imagine that felt like an un-turn-down-able opportunity, and I'm truly so grateful for the way it has changed my financial enoughness math and the feeling of security re: staying housed. But. But! The truth is that I don't love where we live (the town/area/landscape/community I mean — the house/land itself is wonderful) and so it's a constant low-grade struggle for me to know that I'd ideally rather be in a tiny cabin in the mountains somewhere and/or longterm hiking vs in this specific place, while also fully grasping that in so many ways this is the most supportive situation I/we could be in in a collapsing world.
The main complicating factor of all this when it comes to long-distance hiking is that the thing that makes me happiest here at home is the animals (dogs, sheep, chickies) and yet the care they need in my/our absence makes leaving for extended time really tough. Another factor was Gent's spinal injury back in autumn 2023, from which he still feels daily pain/discomfort, and so backpacking together hasn't been an option since then (and is something we looove to do together, and is how we initially met!)
The last thing I'll say, which feels particularly poignant right now, is that the combo of double parental death plus the frightening acceleration of collapse (energy/resource crisis, impending super El Nino, possible AMOC shutdown etc) makes me feel way more urgently "yolo" than I have ever felt before. So I've been confronting the feeling of "BETTER DO YOUR FAVORITE/DREAM HIKES NOW BEFORE YOU CAN NEVER DO THEM AGAIN" while also feeling the craving to root down even more at home and that all feels... yeah.