Today's Joke
1. Regular naps prevent old age.... especially if you take them while driving. 2. Having one child makes you a parent; having two makes you a referee. 3....
Today's Joke
I went to the Walmart today, and I was there for only 5 minutes. When I came out there was a state trooper writing a parking ticket for being in a handicap...
Today's Joke
A collection of funny attorney anecdotes: Q: When is your birthday? A: July fifteenth. Q: What year? A: Every year. Q: All your responses must be oral, okay?...
Today's Joke
A KGB agent walks up to a Jew and says, "Why are you learning Hebrew; we'll never let you leave."The man says, "Oh no, I'm learning Hebrew so when I get to...
Today's Joke
As a group of soldiers stood in formation at an Army Base, the Drill Sergeant said, "All right! All you idiots fall out."As the rest of the squad wandered...
Today's Joke
A man arrives at Ben-Gurion Airport with two bags, one large and one small.The customs agent opens the small bag and finds it full with money so he asks the...
Today's Joke
An Israeli and Arab who are arguing over who a duck belongs to, as they each claim it was killed on their land. The Israeli says, “We will hit each other....
Today's Joke
When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA...
Today's Joke
Three Jewish mothers get together for lunch. As they are being seated in the restaurant, one takes a deep breath and gives a long, slow “oy.”The second takes...
Today's Joke
While attending a public dinner, a Rabbi was seated next to a prominent businessman. Apparently attempting to impress the rabbi, the man mentioned that one...
Today's Joke
A woman was complaining to her husband that the lightbulb in the hallway hadn't been fixed yet."What's the problem?" the husband protested. "Didn't I tell...
Today's Joke
A bunch of boys had come back to school after Pesach vacation and were discussing the length of their Seder."We finished Maggid after Chatzos," one said....
Today's Joke
Lawyer: "Now that you have been acquitted, will you tell me truly? Did you steal the car?"Client: "After hearing your amazing argument in court this morning,...
Today's Joke
Due to a technical error, some subscribers were not lucky enough to receive a joke on Wednesday morning. If you are one of them, please click here to find...
Today's Joke
A guy is in a car accident and he breaks both of his legs. He calls the police and they ask him what street he is on and he says, "I'm on Schlepsentle...
Today's Joke
It had been snowing for hours when an announcement came over the intercom in a high school: "Will the students who are parked on University Drive please move...
Today's Joke
A police officer pulled over a driver and informed him that because he was wearing his seat belt, he had just won $5,000 in a safety competition."What are...
Today's Joke
Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped to gently reprimand the child. Smiling sweetly, the teacher said,...
Today's Joke
A blonde goes to the doctor and tells him she has been extremely moody lately and can't control her temper.He suggests, "Sounds like stress. You should try...
Today's Joke
An old blacksmith realized he was going to have to retire soon, so he picked out a strong young man to become his apprentice.The old fellow was crabby and...