Dear Friend,

Halloween is once again upon us, and like, how did we get here? It felt like I was just getting used to the warmer weather and now we've gone straight to winter? The heat wave earlier this month also made me skip the PSL season altogether. (Also, is PSL season still a thing, or is that yet another sign that I’m getting old and completely out of touch?)

So in the best of circumstances, I aim to write to you around the last week of the month before send it on the last day of each month. And in the five (plus?) years of writing to you, I‘ve never once had the foresight or discipline to write throughout the month and be so on top of things that I could simply schedule my letter ahead of time. In some months, such as this one, I’m doing it all — draft, write, and send — all on the same day. The fact that you’re reading this means I’ve made the deadline. I am but another data point that Parkinson’s Law is real, and it works to great effect.

Want

Perhaps it’s because I’m squarely in the Xennial generation (Geriatric Millennial, if you’re nasty), my upbringing and many of my life experiences consist of bridging people together and putting out fires for others (e.g.: IT support for my parents, liaising with coworkers both younger/older than me, or my entire career as a PM). But that also means I never had the mental space or know-how to dream or plan for myself — not for problem-solving’s sake, but solely for wanting. Saying this isn't to solicit a “pity party” response or anything, but that I realized so much of my planning mindset is based on salvaging or optimizing out of scarcity, and not on building out of abundance. This isn't a good or bad thing, but just a blind spot that‘s worth exploring.

But along the same line, can I also say that my favorite part of wanting something is the planning of it? I love my new now 2-year old car, but so much of my joy is not the car itself but the months researching through so many YouTube videos, building Google Sheets comparisons, and running analysis on gas vs hybrid scenarios? This, perhaps, also speaks to how I did not have many toys growing up so the definition of fun is what and how I invent it to be.

PropFest Returns

If you live in California, come election time (which is now), you’re likely to be confused/overwhelmed/mad about the ridiculous amount of state-wide propositions. So many of them are ambiguously written, and are designed to counter other propositions in the same voting ballot. In any case, please consider the following non-partisan sources for your reference.

I’ve relied on these two specifically in this election cycle, while others I searched for even helped me decide offbeat, nonpartisan positions, like our county Parks Directors and such.

• Bay Curious
• Cal Matters

It‘s the children who are wrong

And speaking of elections, though definitely not limited to them, our world is becoming so personalized that everything we see on social media and TikTok, watch on YouTube, and even read through our AI chatbot is specifically catered to us. People around me (or in general?) are increasingly relying on reading AI summarizations vs. primary sources. (I recently asked someone if they reviewed my report analysis at work, and they proudly told me they didn't but they summarized it into a podcast and listened to it en route to work. 🙈) My coworker recently mentioned how we now live in a “post-truth reality” and we weren’t even talking about news or politics at that.

And because everything you consume is catered just to you, the division is no longer between this-or-that tribe, but these personalization effectively frames any and all disagreements as you vs. everyone else. We are all Principal Skinner and more than ever, it’s the children who are wrong.

12-Week Year: 4 weeks later

Finally, my goal for my 12-week year is to finish The Power Broker by the end of the year, and it is going great. I'm now on Chapter 22 (of chapter 50, totaling to 1,300+ pages) and it’s equal part “Wow, finishing 1,700 of 1,800 park projects within a year is absolutely amazing” and “He can't keep getting away with it!” There were times when I wondered if this is DJT's actual playbook, before sadly admitting that at least Robert Moses built some really nice parks and understood the laws (so that he can draft bills around them, but I digress). Anyways, if you are interested in following along, you can catch up through this equally amazing podcast series by the creator of 99% Invisible.

And here's the rest of it…

Thanks for reading this and being with me on this journey. You can also check out past issues of Dear Friend, here. And thanks so much for writing back through survey responses! I truly appreciate hearing from you! 🙇‍♂️

Here’s the rest of it:

• The photos I took this month
• Interesting enough to share but not enough to write about:
  • The Most Complicated City in America (I really liked his videos about HK, and this is equally great about SF!)
  • This 2 Minute Spread Will Organize Your Entire Life (Not quite Bullet Journal, but this is a great starter guide that also includes elements of Matthew Dick’s Homework for Life)
  • Street Fighter Lore Explained in Under 15 Minutes (This might be the best and most straightforward video about the story of Street Fighter, ever?)
  • Adam Conover: Big Divorce Energy | Full Comedy Special (He's great, and this is free!)
  • What Old Men Are Actually Seeing Online (I am terrified for my parents)
  • The New Siri Sucks. But It Shouldn’t (Great explainer for AI and LLM)
• Don't forget, I’m on Bluesky! Chat with me there!

— Love wins