October 25, 2020

Early Aught Dramas Are The Solution to Everything

Dear Theoretiquette,

One of my direct reports at work seems to be really struggling working remotely. She’s a natural extrovert, and I think not being able to interact with her co-workers face to face is taking its toll. What can I do to support her?

Thanks,

Concerned Coworker in Connecticut

Dear Cococo,

I think this is something a lot of people are struggling with these days. I’m an introvert and even I find myself thinking back nostalgically upon times when I tried to hide from my chatty co-worker or when I would sit in the corner of a party petting the resident animal.

That said, I think the answer is quite simple:

Zoom reenactments of early aughts prime time dramas.

I know, it is genius and I too do not know why no one else has thought about it. Here’s why it’s so perfect:

Universal
Early aught prime time dramas hit at a key moment in the technological development of television. Many people had DVR, making it much easier to watch shows when it was convenient, as opposed to timing your VCR to record and collecting stacks of VHS’s. Meanwhile, social media was blossoming, along with the growing world of content farms, so there was more pressure to watch the shows than before. But at the same time, it was before the vast saturation that we have today of so many different shows and ways to watch them. All of this to say that many people have seen these particular shows.

Accessible
If people haven’t seen them, the bulk are available for streaming online. Lost, Grey’s Anatomy, and The West Wing are on Netflix, Ally McBeal and Desperate Housewives are on Hulu, and The Wire, The Sopranos, and The O.C. are on HBO Max. People can catch up in preparation for the reenactments. Bonus: everyone is about to be stuck inside as winter comes, and they already watched everything that’s been released in the past decade during the last eight months.

Nostalgic
People love to be nostalgic for questionable things from the early aughts: dial up internet incapable of video conferencing, flared jeans, George W. Bush, and so on.

Escapist
The West Wing is known for its political escapism, but really any entertainment without masks, social distancing, and fascism is glorious, indulgent escapism at this point. Let yourself be free and frolic in the relaxing setting of narcotics trafficking in Baltimore.

So there you have it. A totally clear and reasonable explanation as to why this is definitely the solution. Now, all you need to do is schedule yet another mandatory zoom meeting, distribute the scripts, and cast the roles. Before you know it, your extrovert will be happier than she was even in the before times! Problem solved!

*Indie pop song that is about to become extremely popular starts playing*

You’re welcome,

Theoretiquette