The Mean Arena
A play report for a very special Forged in the Dark game, based on the 2000AD strip, The Mean Arena, this time the game is in Watford, Hertfordshire, where Slater’s Slayers come up against Watford Ravenclaws. Many thanks to Dirk the Dice for GMing such an excellent game and all my fellow players!
Sports Report: The Mean Arena Clash at Watford
Teams and Key Players
Slater’s Slayers: Sourpuss, Napoleon, Screaming Sid and Hangman.
Watford Ravenclaws: Steelspine, Reggie Regicide, Luthor, Troy, and the Ravenclaws.
Location: The game unfolded across two unusual venues: the bustling Atria Shopping Centre and the serene but chaotic Watford Manor Buddhist Temple.
First, though the team needed to navigate an ugly crowd, Hangman had been responsible for the death of Steelspine’s teammate and everyone was out for revenge. Sourpuss mooned from the bus and Hangman cartwheel on the roof. This turned the crowd into a seething mass, the bus rocked, windows were smashed and a few Molotov cocktails could be seen. Napoleon relaxes, dolling out fromage and supping on some excellent burgundy.
Screaming Sid fired a ricochet shot knocking the Molotovs to the floor, flames dancing as the crowd backed away and Riley gunned the bus through to safety.
First Half Highlights: Atrial Warfare
The game began with a dramatic series of skirmishes at the Atria Shopping Centre. The air conditioning was malfunctioning, a broken escalator disrupted movement, and chaos erupted near the kids' train and a display of wooden fish and lizards.
Screaming Sid: Took a sniper position on the second level, keeping rivals under pressure.
Sourpuss: Distracted opponents by leaping onto the kids' train and mocking Steelpike.
Hangman: Secured high ground, sprinkling Kosi-Flex happy gas to disorient rivals.
Napoleon: Used his drone, to navigate the field, ultimately slicing through a biscuit display with a laser to free the ball.
The half ended in chaos with a loose ball ricocheting through the shopping centre's "biscuit area" to the tune of "I'm Still Standing."
Downtime Drama
Hangman found himself trapped in a box after his mime meditation went wrong, while Sourpuss endured a scolding from his mother.
Screaming Sid's interview with Kevin O’Conner turned sour when questioned about his signature "Take to the Hills" move.
Meanwhile, Napoleon enjoyed another glass of Burgundy, reflecting on some excellent strategies.
Second Half: A Spiritual Battleground
The match resumed at Watford Manor, where Regicide initially controlled the ball. However, warrior monks protected the site and had seemed to have created a bond with the home team, the Ravenclaws danced on the balcony with them to the tune of, “Don’t Go Breaking My Heart”.
Hangman: Made a daring entrance, catapulting through a window using his lasso.
Napoleon: Guided Hangman and Sid with his drone while setting explosives.
Screaming Sid: Detonated a limpet mine, collapsing the balcony and harshing the Warrior Monks vibe.
Steelspine: Briefly regained possession before chaos ensued.
Regicide: Launched a daring play for the goal, but Sourpuss, Hangman, and Napoleon coordinated to thwart his attempts.
A donation from George Harrison to further peace and tranquillity in the world! The game ended explosively as the goal disintegrated, leaving collapsing crocodile jaws and swarms of dead hornets in its wake. The crew barely escaped aboard a British Leyland Cybertruck, chased by an angry crowd.
Final Score and Aftermath
Watford Ravenclaws 0 Slayter’s Slayers 1
Despite the destruction and mayhem, Slater’s Slayers rose to 8th in Division Two, leaving a legacy of daring moves, explosive plays, and unorthodox strategies. A single goal is enough to consign Watford Ravenclaws to their 17th consecutive defeat.
Player of the Match: Napoleon – for his gallic flair, love of explosives and an endless supply of camembert plus the constitution to down several litres of Burgundy without barely a hiccup.
Full-time chaos, but unforgettable action at The Mean Arena!