Superman #96 (January 1995)

"Dead Again!," Part 10! Superman finally discovers the secret villain behind this storyline: Pa Kent! Wait, no, Batman! No, Doomsday! No, it's all four replacement Supermen from "Reign"! Okay, fine, we already know it's Brainiac, and this issue is about him making Superman hallucinate all kinds of special guest stars in an attempt to make him go insane (and also because Dan Jurgens wanted to draw them, probably).

Man of Streel #40 ended with Superman seeing someone and saying "It CAN'T be YOU!" The shocking figure he saw turns out to be that of Pa Kent, who can't be there because "He should be in Smallville... not here in Metropolis!" Has Superman spent so long flying on his own that he's forgotten about airplanes? Pa very kindly tells Superman that he's not Superman, because everyone knows Superman died. It was kind of a big deal. This is when Batman drops in, and you know it's really Batman because he's saying his famous catchphrase, "I'm a detective!"

(The exclamation is implied.)

Batman says he has used his detecting skills to look into whether Superman is Superman or not, and he's definitely not. He's actually an out-of-work actor who idolized Superman so much that he convinced himself he's Supes when the real one died. Superman points out the main problem with this theory, which is that he can fly... or can he?! He tries to fly, but can barely pull off a pathetic little jump.

Frustrated, Superman starts punching the ground and says he knows who he is. He's from Krypton! That's when Pa reveals that the real Superman wasn't from Krypton -- he inherited his powers from him (Pa). You know, like this one:

Pa blasts the hell out of Superman with the ol' Kent heat vision. Fortunately, an ally stops by to help: Skyboy! You know, Skyboy? "The late Superman's young partner in the fight against crime and injustice"? Everyone loves Skyboy. Meanwhile, to the many onlookers around Superman, it just looks like he's talking to himself and punching the air. When Lois tries to approach him, he sees her as Silver Banshee and is about to punch her, but Guardian pulls her out of the way... before calling her "a comely thing for an Earth female." Classic Guardian.

The four friends "Guardian" mentions above are, of course, Steel, Superboy, the Eradicator, and the Cyborg Superman, who have teamed up against this fifth impostor for stealing their shtick. Superman thinks he's doing a pretty good job fighting all four, when he's actually just destroying some buildings and cars in front of the puzzled bystanders. Next up, it's Ma Kent's turn, and she brought another friend to help explain to Superman that he's not the real one: DOOMSDAY! And by "explain," she means "punch him around some more."

In the real world, Professor Hamilton has figured out that Superman is seeing things that aren't really there and built a "neural neutralizer," a.k.a. "a gun that makes you see reality." It works for a second, but then "Guardian" says he can "easily reestablish his control" and Superman suddenly finds himself trapped in a metal box in outer space. Now that he knows someone's playing with his mind, though, he concentrates and is able to literally punch his way out of his delusion and back to reality. Oh, and he's finally deduced which one of his villains could make him see things that aren't there, so "Guardian" announces that his disguise is no longer necessary and turns into...

...yes, Brainiac. We know it's Brainiac. This is the third issue in a row that ends with "It's Brainiac!" But the next one is the last in this storyline, so, at long last, I can say TO BE CONCLUDED!

Plotline-Watch:

• Among the bystanders watching Superman talk to himself is the goateed killer from Action #705, who thinks it's a sorry spectacle and it's "sick" to delude yourself into believing Superman (who he seems to admire) might still be alive. Buddy, you killed a lady because of a phone bill. Anyway, the killer leaves before Brainiac's ruse is exposed in front of everyone. To think some future headaches could have been avoided if this guy had stuck around for 5 more minutes...

• Yes, that kid up there is wearing a "Death of Superman" t-shirt, which we already knew exist in-universe because someone was selling them during Superman's funeral. The DC wiki identifies the kid as Keith but not only is his hair totally different, Keith would never wear something so distasteful. Imagine wearing a shirt with Dolly Parton's name written on a bloody font after she died.

• Skyboy, Superman's young partner in the fight against crime and injustice™, reminds me a lot of Mitch, the reformed jerk teenager from the "Death of Superman" storyline. Don Sparrow agrees with me (more on that below). Giving Mitch powers? What an Outburst I mean outrageous idea!

• Looooots of "Death of Superman" references throughout the issue, from the four Supermen to Doomsday, but my favorite is the shout out to Superman and Pa flying out of the afterlife in Adventures #500, because that's just such a cool moment. I wouldn't mind seeing all the other artists redraw it at some point.

Shout Outs-Watch:

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And now, as promised: Don Sparrow tells all!

Art-Watch (by @donsparrow):

We start with the cover and it’s something of a strange one, with the cover text (boasting the insane number of big name guest stars) being more of a star than the actual image. We’ve grown used to a raging Superman these past few issues, so the angry, almost simian Superman isn’t too out of place.  The scene, of Superman punching his way out of a box does more or less occur in this issue, but the cover is also something of a misdirection.  Because of the title of the cover “Virtual Reality Bites”, the reader might believe that this is a story about technology or some kind of digital landscape, when it’s actually more mental than that.

Inside, we’re in for a treat as DC legend (and inker of the Man of Steel mini that launched this blog) Dick Giordano inks this issue.  His thick, brushy style is a good match for Joe Rubinstein, the main inker on Jurgens in this era, but feels a touch more polished and less scratchy than Rubinstein was on Jurgens.

Early on there’s an interesting technique they use to perhaps communicate that this isn’t the real Pa Kent that Superman is busy chatting to (rather indiscreetly, I’d say, with Maggie Sawyer and half the city maybe ten feet away), in that we rarely see Pa’s eyes, only the reflection of his glasses, which gives him an eerie vibe.

The guest star roulette continues with Batman’s arrival, and it’s a great look—the overlong cape and long ears of the era made famous by Kelley Jones, translated into a more realistic version by Jurgens and Giordano. 

Next we meet Skyboy, and even an imaginary character looks good handled by Jurgens.  Given his long light brown hair, I wonder if Jurgens had future Superman wannabe sidekick Mitch Anderson in mind somehow. [Max: We did spot another Mitch lookalike two issues ago, so yeah, I think he was probably in Jurgens' mind.]

The full page splash of all four Reign of the Superman characters is a good one, and I do like the detail that their costumes (particularly the Eradicator’s) are a lighter shade of blue.

Page 15 has a good drawing of Superman’s face, but it looks more like it was handled by Art Adams than Dan Jurgens.  Keeping with the creepy parent vibe, Ma Kent smiling beatifically while Superman gets pounded by that “nice, practical young man” Doomsday is a frightening choice. The image of Superman punching his way out of the box of mind control is a great image. Finally, there’s something a little disappointing about our final reveal that Brainiac is really the villain behind all this, given how placid the pose is.  This is the same guy who leveled all of New Genesis, and now is just standing casually behind Lois, whose body language is also decidedly not threatened. 

SPEEDING BULLETS:

• This story’s simple structure, and repetitive dialogue becomes almost comedic as character after character emerges to give the same message.  It puts me in the mind of a famous SNL sketch (which I can’t seem to find on YouTube, but it is on Reddit) where Chris Kattan plays a young boy, and then his baseball hero emerges magically from his closet with an inspiring message.  Then another, and another, and another, and eventually even the little kid has to admit that the words are losing all their meaning.  The diminishing returns here are similar.

• Perhaps the fake loved ones would be more convincing if they’d stuck to one story, rather than each inventing a new delusion for Superman. First Batman claims he’s a delusional out of work actor (this was years before a similarly tragic documentary about troubled—and possibly delusional—Superman actor Christopher Dennis) then Pa Kent claims that he himself has super-powers and was apparently “the real” Superman’s natural father.

• Wait, what?  If Guardian is not really Guardian then why did he bother saving Lois Lane?  Wouldn’t it have driven Superman more insane if he’d pulped her? [Max: I think it was part of Brainiac's plan to convince everyone else that Superman is insane, but then he completely forgot about that plan, perhaps distracted by Lois' comeliness.]

• Far be it from me to criticize Lois Lane’s reporting, but even with the distraction of Superman doing air judo on an invisible assailant, she’s not been terribly observant about how weird Guardian is being.  First, he refers to her as a “comely thing for an Earth female” (and she gives no reaction) then lets out a belly laugh (hand still on Lois’ shoulder!) as Lois laments how unhinged Superman is becoming. Finally, when Lois implores Guardian to get involved, he says “I’ll do something alright! With YOU!” and then there’s like two more pages before Lois says anything else to his vaguely threatening (or horny) comment.  Is Lois hit on with this much regularity, that she's unphased by it all? [Max: To be fair, I don't think she's ever talked to the real Guardian before. Maybe she think he's just a massive weirdo.]

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