Starman #28 (November 1990)
Starman #28 (November 1990)
What? Why is there a Starman comic in this blog? Because this is Part 2 ½ of KRISIS OF THE KRIMSON KRYPTONITE, the storyline that will change Superman forever! (Also because I’ve been super busy this week and haven’t even had time to read any Superman, but I did read this thing.)
In this issue: Superman, having lost his powers (Superman #49) and subsequently realized he sucks without powers (Adventures #472), asks Starman to come over to Metropolis and use his solar abilities to replenish Superman’s batteries. All this plan accomplishes, however, is giving Superman a nice tan (and, apparently, the douchey attitude that comes with one).
Meanwhile, word is getting around Metropolis that Superman may be sick, which means criminals are suddenly getting ballsier. Luckily, one of Starman’s vaguely defined powers is identity theft, so he disguises himself as Superman and flies around the city for a while to prevent panic from spreading. Fake Superman even fools Lex Luthor, who angrily attacks him with the red kryptonite that took away Real Superman’s powers – Superstarman just grabs the rock and flies away with Luthor’s private property, leaving poor Lex utterly baffled.
Wait, did he… make fun of Luthor’s cancer? Is that another power Starman has? Finding out if someone is terminally ill and mocking them from it? Wikipedia doesn’t mention anything like that.
Anyway, Professor Hamilton examines the red K to see if he can revert its effects… but nope, all his instruments say it’s just a regular red rock that glows. And since Superman doesn’t want to rely on Starman forever (can you imagine a Superman with a mullet?!), it’s time for the next crazy plan: ROBOT ARMORS. Continued!
Plotline-Watch:
The robot armor is something Professor Hamilton apparently just threw together in a day, based on that other armor he and Gangbuster once stole from LexCorp (Adventures #451). We’ll see it in action in the next Action.
The reason they thought Superman could get his powers back just by standing near Starman is that that technique did work the last time they met (Starman #14 and Action #645), after Superman’s powers got briefly hijacked by the Parasite. So the plan wasn’t that stupid.
SIX-FIFTY: At one point we see a pair of tourists coming out of a cab in Metropolis and spotting Starman in the sky. The cab fare is… $10.60. Tourists always get ripped off.
This comic is a must-have for any serious Superman collector, because it contains a rare appearance of one of Superman’s most obscure villains: Professor Killgrave (the midget with the Moe haircut last seen in Superman #19), who is shown planning a breakout in his cell at Stryker’s Island. I’ve read this storyline a bunch of times and I seriously forgot that guy was in it.
WTF-Watch:
Speaking of guys called Professor who are insane, I like how Professor Hamilton immediately volunteers his whole life story, including the unsavory parts, to Starman, a guy he’s never met before.
Jesus, all he said “How do you do?” – ask Professor Hamilton for the time and he’ll tell you about his erectile dysfunction problem.