This Newsletter Cannot Save You
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#19: fiesta forever
June 10, 2022
Welcome to issue #19 of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU. If you'd asked me at the outset if I thought I'd reach issue #19, I'd have politely scoffed as I...
#18: the sweet release of pure oblivion
May 27, 2022
Welcome to issue #18 of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU. If you missed my birthday screenings a couple weeks ago, or if you were there and would like to...
#17: but i'm still young at heart. why are you laughing. please stop
May 13, 2022
Welcome to issue #17 of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU. Tomorrow night - Saturday, May 14 - is my birthday, and if you're not doing anything, maybe you'll...
#16: i dig the part where he says "around the world"
April 29, 2022
Welcome to issue #16 of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU. In two weeks, when you receive issue #17, it will be my birthday weekend. That Saturday, May 14, I...
#15: down the street, around the corner, and a couple train rides away from greatness
April 15, 2022
Welcome to issue #15 of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU. I've almost got too much to tell you about this issue, but that's balanced by the fact that I'm also...
#14: "we came here to dance"
April 1, 2022
Welcome to issue #14 of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU, brought to you by the same insouciant attitude that allows me to face the world each morning without...
#13: "a frenzied explosion of dazzling WTFness"
March 18, 2022
Welcome to issue #13 of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU, in which we momentarily divert your attention, dangling baubles and trinkets with mysterious...
#12: rousing theme music plays
March 4, 2022
Welcome to issue #12 of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU, in which I send flares up from the isolation chamber of my office here in Seattle, hoping to attract...
#11: ok betting pool is green
February 18, 2022
Welcome to issue #11 of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU, steadily climbing up the really big hill, starting to pick up speed, and realizing they haven't...
#10: finely tuned & carefully crafted
February 4, 2022
Welcome to issue #10 of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU, cracking double digits at long last. Highlights from Scottoworld The audiobook version of BATTLE OF...
#9: mercifully free of disco balls
January 21, 2022
Welcome to issue #9 of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU, coming to you direct from the halls of my secret sanctum, the Corner Office in the Basement. If...
#8: "a wild, unhinged ride"
January 7, 2022
Welcome to issue #8 of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU - the last issue of my trial run/"beta" period. Thanks for joining me as I experimented with format &...
#7: "the true meaning of christmas"
December 24, 2021
Welcome to issue #7 of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU. Hopefully by the end of this missive, we'll have learned something special about the meaning of...
#6: "please adjust tracking for best picture quality"
December 10, 2021
Welcome to issue #6 of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU. This issue, I'm attempting a streamlined variation on the template to see how that feels: lower word...
#5: "I dig your groovy tunes, man"
November 26, 2021
Welcome to issue #5 of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU, the newsletter that received an infuriating zero Grammy nominations despite having the best year of...
#4: "secret magnum opus"
November 12, 2021
Welcome to issue #4 of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU, coming to you straight from my virtual office right here in the METAVERSE. I like it here. It's nice....
#3: "rabbit donut"
October 29, 2021
Welcome to issue #3 of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU, the newsletter that has the guts to ask the important questions, such as: "Am I... am I adding value...
#2: "Thumbs up! It good!"
October 15, 2021
Welcome to this installment of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU. Thanks for being here - it means a lot! Please share this newsletter with anyone you like....
#1: "let's do this"
October 6, 2021
Welcome to issue zero of THIS NEWSLETTER CANNOT SAVE YOU. It's probable Buttondown will call this issue one, but we'll know the truth, just you and me....
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