dear creative friends,

I write to you from the first day of autumn rain in Istanbul. last Thursday I didn't write, because an old friend visited, and, in stark contrast to my summer hermit life, we spent 12-hour days outside, everyday (see below), and talked so much and for so long, such that by the end of the day, I could not lift a finger to write even a sentence...

dear earthly friends,

sending you a brief note this week, from the middle of a migraine -- and a week of too much world. an old friend I knew from many lives ago arrived and I've been showing her around Istanbul, which can often feel like wandering inside a marvelous headache...

inspiration log this week

dear gentle friends,

last night I dreamed that I was inside a website. I was going in circles and ended up on the homepage, again and again. the structure of a website is very conducive to a dream. and vice versa. (if I can dream about a website, then I can make a website like a dream). all this too say -- I've been so busy with world-building work, I haven't had time to finish my own.

this week, I talked to my partner about the future and realized that I'm at the age where I feel the urge to plan a little -- not in terms of days or weeks, but years -- marriage, children, travel, house -- that list of things that normal people do. those rites of passages that I think I'll want -- at least, my own version of them.

but, thinking in terms of years felt scary -- and suddenly, counting the years (2023, 2024, 2025, 2026...) I wondered: what year will it be when I die? at first, that thought was difficult to hold -- and then it was somehow... liberating.

hello wilderness friends,

this week I had strange, vivid dreams, and woke up before sunrise everyday to write and draw. it felt comforting to return to those practices -- like drinking soul water, eating soul food.

I've been a bit too consumed by client work lately, and I made this pie chart to capture how I felt, and clarify how I wanted to feel in my distribution of creative energy:

a pie chart of creative work energy — kening zhu

reflecting on how i spend my energy these days

dear creative friends,

I'm really trying to break the habit of writing these letters at 1am Thursday (my Friday) mornings, but for whatever reason, I tend to play with pressure and promises (deadlines) with a strange pleasure. (maybe this is like finding the edge of pleasure/pain, in work?)

last week I didn't write you because I was playing host/tour guide/translator to the kind of friend that takes up 99% of my brainspace -- and I felt tired and (unfortunately) psychically malnourished for days.

thus, for this week's letter, I'll share some nourishing things I've been ingesting lately.

dear ocean friends,

this is guide.notes 17, a weekly letter on building internet universes to nourish the soul.

I started redesigning my website today, after what has been a very, very, long constipation/delay. you can see the ongoing (secret) homepage here - this is how far I got this afternoon:

dear web spirit friends,

~this is guide.notes 16, a letter on tending your magical ecosystem on the internet~

this week, I started drawing two pages of what I intend to be a digital book about summer -- "too hot to hug" and "a single day without watermelon is a wasted day"

summer means it's too hot to hug — kening zhu

we do one finger hugs instead

dear gentle friends of the void,

~this is guide.notes 15, a weekly letter on the labor of love of sustaining a rich creative life in the pixelated world~

this week I fell off a steep cliff (in terms of energy levels / motivation) -- and spent many mornings succumbing to the urge to close my curtains and take a nap, until mid-afternoon. here's how it felt:

end of the cycle mood (the zombie float)

dear wayfinding friends,

~this is guide.notes 14, where I obsess over the process of growing fruit-bearing, shade-giving orchards in a concrete jungle internet.~

today is my 1 year anniversary with Luna (like, I picked her up exactly a year ago from a cafe, and drew the story here) and tomorrow, I'll probably make a 1 year video of all the photos I hoarded over the year. I will share it with you next week.

last week, I wrote a movie review, and two distillations of k-dramas... but this week, I've resumed nerding out on creative systems and processes, and I experienced what you might call... a breakthrough.

dear seeker-friends,

~this is guide.notes #13, a weekly newsletter on opening the creative deluge, and building a digital world that nourishes your worldly life~

~

rest first, work later

dear magical seashell-seeking friends,

~this is guide.notes 12, a weekly email on caring for, and channeling -- your creative spirit/essence/patronus to roam free on the wilderness of the internet-universe.~

let's begin with

an invitation to rest

dear stranger-friends,

I'm writing you this artist digest from a sticky summer night in Istanbul. since my last letter, I traveled too much, then hosted / ran around the city with a series of visitors (including my parents) -- but, after all that, I've landed in a new phase of feeling embodied, peaceful, and in creative momentum.

(the answer to stuckness is always: movement. movement is nourishing, even when it's tiring.)

here's a snapshot from a cafe I visited last weekend, on an island an hour from the city.

dear creative friends,

this is guide.notes 11; where I nerd out loud on the process of nurturing a soft and true creative life in a capitalist world.

*

I won't lie, this week my brain is mush. when summer hits me in the face, my body starts to feel like it's swimming through molasses. more significantly, my parents are visiting / living with me for two weeks -- which means I'm spending days being enthusiastic tour guide / translator / chinese daughter / defender of my sanity (and my father's wallet from snake-tongued Turkish carpet sellers at the Grand Bazaar!), and nights at my computer, in bed, working in the dark (like now).

dear kindred friends,

this is guide.notes #10 -- on the process of nourishing an embodied creative life in the digital world.

this email is about money -- as requested by your Lazy Q&A votes from last week's letter. (thank you all for voting! I will address Notion + planning my days in another letter).

first, I'll admit that I'm a total money novice at the very beginning of my studies. by that I mean: until very recently, I disliked thinking about money; let alone putting any intention into working with it as an energy force/resource -- a kind of daily cultivation that (I only recently realized) is not unlike making art, or doing wellbeing practices.

dear kindred spirits,

this is guide.notes 09 -- on the process of nurturing a creative life. I’ve committed to writing on Thursdays — so you’ll hear from me every week, henceforth <3

this week, I wanted to share reflections on a reoccurring theme/challenge in my life — solitude vs. community -- (or should I say, solitude AND community). you can read it here.

dear creative friends,

hello from guide.notes 08 ~ on the process of nurturing a creative life.

this week, I'm sharing a post I wrote specifically for a kindred internet friend (<3) of this past season's creative circle, who asked for resources on navigating a break-up. you can also read it here.

dear creative friends,

this is guide.notes 07 ~ on the process of nurturing a creative life.

this week's letter is a very meta post about feeling overwhelmed by all the things. it's about creative procrastination, paralysis, and guilt - especially if you, like me, are prone to moodiness and getting lost in the wormhole of time. you cam read it here.

let's pick a day of the week?

hello creative friends,

this is guide.notes #6, on the process of nurturing a creative life.

recently: I've been in a life blur of stomach flu, the anxiety of travel plans, and the guilt of many unanswered emails. I'm still looking for a dog sitter for Luna in Istanbul for ~2 weeks in early April. write me asap if that could be you.

this week, I want to share a piece I wrote called, "lonely work is swimming in the ocean alone." it's about the joys and perils of working for yourself, inspired by something my brother said to me, years ago:

dear stranger-friends,

hello from my first digest of 2023. these days, it's been zombie weather in istanbul -- neither dark nor light, but heavy and grey, suspended in between.

since the earthquake, there has been talk and forecasting around the next big one to hit Istanbul. I've been thinking about what art I can create about the city before I go, and how to give it my very best.

here's what's inside this email:

dear creative friends,

hello from my favorite month for building creative things: January of Capricorn season. every year around this time, I get a surge of energy to do earthy things: nest, redo my website, and nurture concrete business projects. I noticed that my annual cycles usually repeat like this:

• Scorpio season - a somewhat dramatic death & rebirth, significant and mysterious internal shifts

• Sagittarius season - breathe, rest, and digest my year. watch harry potter, read books, play games.