a quick word from the gardener

I went away last weekend for a prayer retreat, hoping to find out how a bunch of scattered pieces were meant to come together. I wanted a Damascus-road moment — something clear to tell me what’s next in my creative calling?

But as I think about Paul, his Damascus-road experience didn’t lead to clarity. It left him blind, then spending the next three years mostly alone with God. Learning. Re-orienting. Living inside a long transition.

Over the last five years of quieting, I’ve been learning to pay attention to transitions — even though I really don’t like them. They press against my utilitarian programming: How can I make this useful? What can I squeeze in from here to there? Slowly, I’m learning to see transitions as a kindness of God. They give my soul time to move from one thing to another without rushing. I’m learning that ultimate efficiency can damage relationship.

So when I asked how the pieces will come together, the answer I didn’t want came instead: You’re in transition, Katelynn.

It made me think of middle schoolers — the ones I’ve walked with for years, and now one in my own home. They live at the margins. They’re messy, half-formed, deeply in-between. And I believe that God is especially present there.

Now I’m being asked to apply what I know to myself: that this transition time is precious. Absolutely necessary. And so full of God.

Can I rest here — messy and unfinished — and trust the process?

notes to explore:

bring me your angst: the call to tell the truth about what hurts, handing it off and trusting Him to hold it well.

understanding is forgiveness: on the Gospel-love behind the pursuit to see clearly.

delight: teapots in taiwan

more delights to inspire you →

today’s invitation

Benevolently detach.

In love, with prayer, release your mind from holding burdens you were never meant to carry. When we do this, we carve out space for God to come in.

But what about loving my neighbor? What about the call to carry one another's burdens? This is a call given in the context of close community.

And even then, we help where we can, we pray, then we release.
Submission and faith.

more on benevolent detachment and other graces →

more on placing the weight back in His hands →

Thank you for going down the path with me today. If this is your first time, I encourage you to check out this note explaining the idea of the digital garden and what's up with the weird title 😄.

Peace to you! ✌️