7/2/18
i'm thankful for the sound of rain outside. i'm thankful that i don't have to commute for my job, which is a huge privilege that i let other stresses about work make me forget sometimes but which i shouldn't. i'm thankful that though i didn't mind commuting in and of itself most of the time, and sometimes even enjoyed it, i'm thankful to not have to do it, especially in the rain. i'm thankful that me not commuting made it possible for us to live in the house we live in now, which is nicer than the houses and apartments we had when we lived closer to town.
i'm thankful that i am feeling a bit better mentally than i was and the prospect of the beginning of the work week looming before me doesn't fill me with dread as it has in recent weeks. i'm thankful to remember how at my university job that was the real sign that prozac was working initially, that one day when i was walking to work i realized that i didn't feel reflexively stressed about the prospect of another day as i had every day prior to that. i'm thankful that though i'm not quite there yet, small steps forward are still steps forward. i'm thankful for the weird personality test i took as a professional development thing and to be intrigued to see my results.
i'm thankful for this essay on nirvana by jen pelly, which is dripping with spirit. i'm thankful for "let's twist again" by chubby checker, a sequel song that is so nakedly commercial, yet still joyful: i'm thankful for the moment in the episode of mad men where it's used where everyone goes wild with joy when it comes on the jukebox. i'm thankful for how pleasurable it has been to rewatch mad men lately, for how rich the characters and performances are, for how it is a show which is visually alive but not over-styled, for the writing, which makes me laugh and makes me feel. i'm thankful that the episodes, like good pop songs, are always over before i'm ready for them to be.
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