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Layers of stupidity

I grew up in Ontario, a province named after a nearby lake. I guess that means, by the transitive property, that the province should now be called “America”.

That’s stupid, obviously, and not only because calling the average Ontario resident an “American” is a good way to get the shit kicked out of you. It’s stupid because naming a region or lake after an entire continent is pretty dumb. Imagine if China called itself “Asia”, or Germany “Europe.” You would mock them (and you’d be right).

But this is essentially what the United States of America did. The word “America” predates 1776 by centuries, and always referred to a vast region stretching from modern-day Argentina all the way to Alaska. “The United States of America” isn’t a name for a country so much as a description. A group of states, united, on the continent of America.

It wasn’t common to refer to the US as “America” until the 1890s. The word “America” isn’t in the national anthem, or any patriotic songs written before that decade. After the revolution, there were multiple attempts to choose an actual name. One idea was Columbia—this is why the capital city, a huge river, and a prestigious university all have that name. Unfortunately the US procrastinated so long that another country took that one. Another proposed name was “Fredonia“, after the concept of freedom. Honestly it’s kind of amazing that one didn’t stick, but it’s still available (mostly—the Marx brothers used it for a fictional country).

But the people of the United States of America kept putting it off, failing to pick a name, the same way they’re failing to do anything about climate change or their deficit now. They put off choosing a name so long that they gradually just accepted the generic leftovers, referring to themselves, and their country, by the name of the continent.

English speakers in other countries largely go along with this. In much of Latin America, though, the word “Americano” refers to anyone from North and South America. Residents of the United States of America are called “estadounidenses”, which translates to “United Statesers” (or “United Statesians”?). This is what Bad Bunny was referencing when he said “God bless America” before listing every New World country, the coolest moment from any Super Bowl in years.

So calling Lake Ontario “Lake America” is stupid for the obvious reasons, yes, but there are layers to this stupidity. America is the name of two continents. Renaming a random lake “Lake America” is like renaming the Baltic or Mediterranean “the European Sea”. You’re replacing a longstanding name—with a ton of specific, interesting history—and changing it to something generic.

It’s like a Temu listing for a lake. It’s pathetic. It’s small. It’s sad.

Canadians, for what it’s worth, don’t need to rename any of the Great Lakes. The biggest one is already called Superior, which is exactly how we all feel whenever the US president opens his mouth. A few humble suggestions: figure your shit out, choose an actual name for your country, and elect some human beings to run it. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

🔗 https://justinpot.com/layers-of-stupidity/

How to actually see posts from your friends and family on Instagram

Instagram is a hostage situation. It has photos and videos from the people in your life, but it will only show them to you occasionally—most of the time you get algorithmically-chosen slop. This means you can scroll for hours on this so-called social network and learn very little about the people you care about.

Maybe you like slop, which is up to you. If you miss your friends and family, though, there’s a hidden way to get them back. Just head to https://www.instagram.com/?variant=following in your browser. This will show every post by the people you follow, with the newest posts first. Scroll until you see something you’ve seen before, then close Instagram. The way it used to be.

I recommend bookmarking this link and using it every time you feel like browsing Instagram on your computer. You’ll get the social benefits of keeping up with your friends without the time sink of scrolling. Win-win.

But what about on your phone? Honestly, I recommend not browsing social media on your phone, but if that’s not an option for you, there’s still things you can do. You can find this timeline in the official app by tapping the Instagram logo in the top-left corner, then tapping “Following”. There’s no way to make this your default timeline in the official app, so I recommend using your phone’s browser instead. Bookmark the link above and use that when you feel like looking at pictures.

I tried adding this alternative timeline to my home screen as a web app but it didn’t work—Meta rigged it so that all such shortcuts re-direct to the slop timeline. But I did manage to make a Shortcut for the iPhone that will open the correct link in your browser—download that here. Add it to your home screen and you’ll have a slop-free Instagram, available in one tap. You can even change the icon to a camera.

Android users: I don’t have as elegant a solution for you. I recommend making a bookmark in your browser. If anyone in the comments comes up with anything I’ll update this piece.

🔗 https://justinpot.com/how-to-actually-see-posts-from-your-friends-and-family-on-instagram/

Stuff I Wrote

• I didn’t exactly enjoy writing this for PopSci, but I did learn a lot: https://www.popsci.com/health/how-gross-is-biting-your-fingernails-bacteria-fungus-saliva-gums-teeth-damage/

• My Canadian heart feels strongly about this one: https://www.popsci.com/health/how-gross-is-wearing-your-shoes-inside-poop-germs-lead-poisons-allergies/