Last week, I wrote about being old, but feeling young. Above, you’ll see a picture of me being old. Yes, that’s me. Playing Santa. I’m playing Santa. Santa Claus.

This is actually my third year playing Santa for the school. I’m not really sure how it happened. They were desperate for a Santa that year and I had yet to shave when they asked, so I was like, “Sure.”

Some well-off parent at the school got me the nifty, old school costume there. I assume they were European, whoever did it, because there’s a real Swedish, Norwegian, Finnish vibe to the costume. I got measured for it and everything and they did NOT scrimp on the materials. I look great in it. And even better, I use my real beard, coloring it gray with some kind of god-awful spray, the scent of which lingers for several days. It completes the look.