Ridiculous Opinions #208
Look, here’s the problem with Generation Z (or whatever the hell they’re called). I’m talking about any of you yahoos born AFTER 1995.
We were in the car yesterday, and Harper* demanded that we listen to Taylor Swift’s “Midnights”. I acquiesced. But before she started it, she said, “Should I put it on shuffle?”
WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS GENERATION?!?
Shuffling an album?!? My God, the sacrilege!! Why is that even an option?!?
Look, Gen Z, albums are made to played through in their ENTIRETY! You start at the beginning, and you play it through ALL THE WAY TO THE END!
That’s it! There is no argument there. Artists spent time deciding on a song order and they put the album together in a meticulous way. That is the way it was meant to be played. Period.
The Joshua Tree is meant to be played from beginning to end.
Here is Everything is meant to be played from beginning to end.
Dark Side of the Moon is meant to be played from beginning to end.
What’s Goin’ On is meant to be played from beginning to end.
OK Computer is meant to be played from beginning to end.
I could go on and on. Learn some lessons, Gen Z. Albums are meant to be played from beginning to end. Movies are meant to be seen on a big screen (not your computer). Photos aren’t meant to be perfect. TV shows should be released once a week, not all at once.
We know these things to be true.
* This sounds like a diatribe against Harper, but it is a diatribe against a generation raised on phones and iPads. Harper is spectacular and was only trying to be helpful. And the album, when listened to from beginning to end, was pretty good, though I do wish Taylor Swift would remove three syllables from every line that she writes.
