Hello, friends! I do realize that it’s been a while since I published a Ridiculous Opinions letter, so let’s get started, shall we? See that view above? That’s where I’m sitting as I write this. It is a beautiful 17 degrees and across the water over there is a town called Belleville, Ontario. We are staying at our friends’ house over the summer.

I am writing this newsletter as I watch a robot clean the pool in front of me. I have to watch the robot when it cleans, because every once in a while, the robot will be trudging along the bottom of the pool and hit some kind of weird corner and stop moving because its tracks are no longer touching the bottom. It makes me think that the robot is stupid, but truly, I am the stupid one because I am ascribing human emotions and intelligence to a machine whose sole job is to go back and forth in the pool, sweeping up algae off the bottom. But dammit, this robot has a personality. Even now, the robot is mocking me by getting stuck on the stairs that are not three feet in front of me. It’s stuck there and in my mind, the robot is saying, “Hey, Randy…whut’s this stuff? I can’t climb these here stairs!” and I am looking at the robot and saying, “You stupid, stupid robot! Can’t you think for yourself?” Clearly, it cannot.