Set Sail Aboard The Good Ship CROONERS!
What do you do when the travel bug bites, but San Francisco is still the only place you want to be? Return to the Golden Age of Travel as “CROONERS Takes You Places!”-- coming Sunday, March 22nd, at 7 and 9pm, only at the magical Stookey’s Blue Room!
As our regulars know, the Stookey’s “Moderne” aesthetic so perfectly evokes the ocean liners and luxury railcars of the 30’s, it’s only natural that we’d arrive at this theme eventually! Paired with great hospitality, incredible cocktails, and elegant evening wear– well, you’d almost swear you were crossing the channel with Ingrid Bergman and Cary Grant, or maybe throwing a late night mixer in the upper berth with those lovely girls, Daphne and Josephine!*
This month, the CROONERS crew will circumnavigate the American songbook, reaching far off destinations and exotic keys with the help of our helmsman, Brendan Getzell! And hoorah– our Captain of Conviviality, Chester Vanderbox, has returned from travels of his own, so it should be smooth sailing from here on out! Of course, able bodied seamen are no match for those cunning Cruise Directors Polly Amber Ross and EnSeanTe— they sing, they flirt, and they double as flotation devices in an emergency!
This week’s special guest stars are Bebe Sweetbriar and Another Bard, and they’re sure to make globetrotting look easy! So pack a steamer trunk or a rucksack, and join us on this musical expedition over land, sky and sea as “CROONERS Takes You Places!” As always, we like to give our subscribers first crack at our discount code– good for any seat at the 9pm show! So use the secret password “VACAY20”, and we’ll see you on the Lido Deck for shuffleboard!
*Bonus points for getting the obscure “Some Like It Hot” reference.
LOOKING FORWARD
Switch/Board and FLORID return!
Followers of Fancypants know that in addition to our monthly cabaret and the quarterly club night that started it all, Fancypants Productions also offers a few seasonal specials! When the weather warms and the calendar happily decongests, we look forward to the return of those offerings that are best suited to warm weather.
Returning to the Blue Room stage for all four Mondays in May, the delightfully well-received comedy trio of Nicole Odell, Sean Owens, and Brendan Getzell return with another dizzying foray into SWITCH/BOARD! Yes, four more improvised screenplays based on the telephone, performed as live radio theatre.
If you think that’s confusing, just strap in and grab a cocktail, and let the narrative turn loop-de-loops under you! In the spirit of inspiration, Master Mixologist Kelly Blong will be creating three new drink specials to suit the endeavor! No theme park can compare to the themes that await in May– stay tuned for the official announcement and a chance to buy your tickets to all four shows at a special price, in next month’s newsletter.
in June, Fancypants will once again take up residence in the Secret Gardens behind the floral boutique Chartreuse by Roje, for five consecutive months of FLORID! Located at 2095 Market Street at Church, in San Francisco, FLORID allows you to step through this opulent showroom full of bright blossoms, handsome housewares and audacious artwork into a glorious open-air sanctuary for a midday feast for the senses!
On the second Sunday of each month from June to September, FLORID bursts into bloom with artists and musicians of incomparable beauty– as well as literary offerings and taste treats! This year, the festivities are higher (and the entry prices are lower than ever) thanks to our partnership with the Pilsner Inn, who are setting up a full bar in the backyard to meet all your libational desires!
SWITCH/BOARD takes over Stookey’s Blue Room on Mondays in May, creating both back-to-back events with FANCYPANTS on 5/17, and a special Memorial Day weekend finale – 5/4, 11, 18 & 25– at 7pm! FLORID kicks off Sunday June 14th, with a Pride cabaret that offers up delicate buds of every variety, “Pansies On Parade!” Tickets available soon– as always, newsletter devotees will be among the very first to know!
ENSEANTE INSPIRED BY BEACONS
At the Castro Art Walk on March 6th, with a backdrop of BEACONS (a luminous solo exhibition at Queer Arts Featured by our own Nathaniel J. Bice), EnSeanTe brought forward a book of poetry inspired by the neon signs so lovingly captured by the artist, entitled “What’s Your Sign?”
Queer Arts Featured is a beloved home to some of the city’s finest queer and trans artists, and it has served as a safe space within the Castro community. In an almost alchemical intersection of artmaking and spiritual kinship, one of the neons hanging in the exhibition is the neon cocktail sign from Stookey’s which glows so proudly at the corner of Bush & Taylor in San Francisco.
We offer this poem to you, dear readers, who have supported and celebrated us in all our various settings and guises. This is the story of how CROONERS came to be:
STOOKEY’S BLUE ROOM
In a magician’s cabinet,
There’s a door at the back of the box.
The assistant steps through and disappears.
Sometimes the trick is just that simple.
Sometime’s it’s more complicated.
Sometimes there’s a door at the back,
But the assistant stays put and provides distraction,
And the magician’s already on the other side.
Also sometimes the magic is real.
Let me explain.
The assistant is always (overtly or covertly)
A partner– in my case, doubly so.
But also in my case, it’s often me
Who’s dressed as the distraction.
The magic box, in this case, is Stookey's.
Stookey’s Club Moderne at Bush and Taylor,
To be specific– they said with a wave of their hand.
It was conjured up with a lot of hard work,
But it feels inevitable,
Like it’s always been there.
A real beauty.
Normally what vanishes as Stookey’s
Is two to three of the most expertly crafted cocktails
You’ve ever tasted,
All of your momentary cares and woes,
And maybe one or two hours more than you’ve budgeted.
Stookey’s feels like the Golden Age of Travel:
From the neon gleam out front
To the chrome on every calculated curve,
It conveys one along with the silent stealth of a zeppelin,
To the time of the Big Band and white dinner jackets.
A stationary booze cruise to days gone by.
The interior is not vast.
It’s a rectangular box
And it fills up on weekends
The way a subway car does at rush hour.
Walk in on a Tuesday at dusk
And make the crowds vanish:
That’s the easy sleight of hand
Every regular knows.
On this Tuesday, in the box, at this moment
There are five whole people:
Our bartender, MK, faces us like a choir conductor,
And as a group united,
We are singing their praises.
In addition to MK,
There are two really nice strangers
And two really nice coats– one of them mine.
One of the strangers at the far end
Waves a hand, offers to buy us a drink.
Always a welcome distraction.
But just over the shoulder of this distraction
There’s a second distraction–
There’s a door at the back of the box
That’s never been there before.
The assistant (my partner)
Points it out immediately.
“Was that always there?”
I leap off my stool.
“Hold my coat.”
I leave my assistant juggling three things:
The distraction buying us drinks,
And the two great coats, one still occupied.
With all eyes fixed on the conductor,
I slip through the door at the back of the box.
The door that wasn’t always there.
I step into a mirror image set:
Footprint reversed, but largely identical.
Like those optical illusions–
Two boxes labeled
“Can You Spot The Difference?”
I spot them immediately.
Three customers instead of four.
Drinks, but no bartender.
Also the room is more… blue.
It’s a blue room, if I had to label it.
The front door of which is not,
Never has yet been, opened.
These three people somehow found
The door at the back of the box,
Found drinks, and are drinking them,
In this brand new, very blue room.
And there’s a magician.
One of the three. An actual magician.
A magician I know, in fact, but he’s
Usually on the other side of the country,
Not on the other side of my favorite nightspot,
In a very blue room that didn’t exist.
The magician looks up,
All trace of surprise concealed with professional ease,
And he says “What are you here for?
To pitch a new show?”
And here's how you know he’s a magician.
The third customer looks up,
Like a plant in the audience
When the magician says,
“May I have a volunteer?”
And this average looking guy,
Seated alone, enjoying his beer,
And perhaps basking in the quiet accomplishment
Of having just opened a secret blue room somewhere,
Looks up at me and says,
“What kind of show?”
And so it begins:
The volunteer from the audience and I
Perform a kind of mind-reading act.
He says,
“What kind of show do you do?”
In the back of my mind, I think,
“Crooners.”
“What kind of show do you need,” I say.
He waves a hand at the room,
And I spot the other difference:
A piano. A real beauty.
“I want to see people all dolled up,
In great coats, y’know?
Swaying to those old standards of the 30’s and 40’s,
Back when they had… whaddayacallem?”
Nothing up my sleeve.
“Crooners?” I offer.
We shake hands that night.
So now, 12 times a year
And twice nightly,
CROONERS brings the show
And the crowds with the great coats.
With my partners at the mic and at the door,
And me dressed as the assistant,
A real beauty.
Together we wave our hands
And quietly set sail for a new Golden Age
And some welcome distraction.
And it feels like we’ve always been there.
Sometimes the magician appears
On his same little stool,
Near the door at the back of the box.
And MK is always there,
Shaking cocktails in perfect time with the music–
Making music and magic of their own.
But the trick I never tire of
Is when an empty room fills
With strangers and friends,
And they– you– month after month,
Bring the magic.
The book, “What’s Your Sign” is currently available for purchase at Queer Arts Featured— where you can also see BEACONS, on exhibition through March 29.
Thank you for reading our newsletter and supporting independent, queer arts in San Francisco! While you’re waiting for the next, did you know that you can see photos from previous shows and read about our performers on our website?
See you at the show!
-EnSeanté and the Fancypants cohort
