Why I hate shame and blame with money
Even if it gets clicks
For some reason last week, my social media fed me a lot of Dave Ramsey videos probably because of what I write about for a living. I ended up blocking quite a few in the hopes of changing the algorithm. Ew.
Let me be blunt: I’m not a fan of Dave Ramsey or Suze Orman.
It’s not because they’re loud or dramatic though they are and they get a LOT of media attention. It’s because their version of personal finance is based on a narrow worldview that often ignores the structural and political forces shaping our financial realities.
Ramsey’s advice leans heavily on the idea that if you just work hard enough and follow his steps: no debt, no credit cards, cash envelopes, you’ll be financially free. Orman, on the other hand, made headlines years ago by warning that your daily coffee habit was costing you a million-dollar retirement. The quote was, You are peeing $1 million down the drain as you are drinking that coffee. Do you really want to do that? No.’
She had a point about putting money towards savings and doing that early gives you more time in the market. Now, according to the article, that was assuming a yearly double-digit return. It’s good advice couched in shaming language, which doesn’t help anyone because instead of taking away the lesson of ‘hey, compound interest is a good thing especially if you start early and make regular deposits to your account,’ you focus on feeling bad because you buy coffee and come on, it’s only three dollars.
You can have coffee and put money away - assuming you can afford it because a lot of personal finance assumes you can afford to have an RRSP, Roth IRA or a 401K. Not everyone has that.
But here’s the truth neither of them seems to say out loud: You’re not locked out of home ownership or financial stability just because you had brunch last weekend. You’re locked out because the economy isn’t built for you to succeed. Especially if you’re single, renting, and trying to build a life in a city or elsewhere.
Personal finance only works up to a point. Budgeting is useful. Tracking your spending, saving what you can, building an emergency fund - all of that matters. But at some point, we hit the ceiling of what personal responsibility alone can do. And when you hit that ceiling, what you’re left with is politics.
The cost of living isn’t spiraling out of control because individuals made poor choices. It’s spiraling because governments at every level have failed to make the structural changes necessary to keep housing affordable and cities livable.
Let’s look at housing in Ontario. The provincial government removed rent control on units built after November 2018. That means if you’re renting a new unit, your landlord can raise your rent by any amount once your lease is up. This isn’t a budgeting issue, it’s a policy decision. And it affects your bottom line far more than your grocery delivery habit ever will. On the plus side, rents are dropping but that’s not because of rent control, it’s due to a high supply in the condo market, less demand from international students thanks to the limits on study permits and the state of the job market.
Zooming out further: The Canadian federal government got out of building housing in the 1990s. Before that, governments regularly invested in public and affordable housing. Now? Most of that responsibility has shifted to the private sector, which, to no one’s surprise, except maybe the government’s? is more interested in profit than in affordability. We’re left with decades of underbuilding, a market over-reliant on developers, whose goal is profit, real estate speculation, and renters scrambling to find stable housing. We seem to be in a reversal of that decision 30 years ago but it’s early days and it’s a long game filled with developer fees, recalcitrant councillors and NIMBYism. I mean, these are people who get upset about six-plexes. Honestly.
So no, our inability to buy a house or afford life isn’t because we bought too many soy/almond/matcha/oak milk lattes. It’s because wages in some industries haven’t kept up, costs have exploded, and social policies have failed to keep up with modern life. Plus if you're single without a second income or someone to split rent, groceries, or bills, you're navigating a system that was never designed for you to thrive.
Personal finance matters. But it can only take you so far when the system is tilted. Let’s stop acting like shame is a financial strategy. Let’s stop pretending that being poor is a moral failing.
This week’s readings:
Isabel Sloane’s piece: Everything is a ‘Recession Indicator’ Now (Freak Palace, Substack)
Why Canada builds micro condos (YouTube)
It’s time Canada took another look at how it taxes death (Financial Post)
Crushed by costs: Survey reveals ‘cost of living in Canada’ now the top fear for households (Money.ca)
ChatGPT advised women to ask for lower salaries, study finds (The Next Web)
Street Law Workshops Empower Seniors with Legal Literacy (Trent University)
Excellent article.
Thanks!