Potatoes, and being yourself
I went to see comedian/writer type person Robin Ince last night. I’ve been going to his shows for years and it’s always a good time. This show was both what...
On Acceptance
We cannot move away from what we are until we thoroughly accept what we are. Then change seems to come about almost unnoticed. Carl Rogers, On Becoming A...
Reflection as spending time
The thing about reflection is that it’s not really meant ot have a goal. Yes you may come to some conclusions or have a breakthrough, but that’s really a...
Planning as avoidance
Programming note: I’m moving the publish date of the newsletter back from Wednesdays to Thursdays. While I try to write newsletters in advance, Wednesdays...
Power of trusting in yourself
I have a little pile of books that live on my desk. They are a mix of a couple of books I need to move to somewhere else and I’ve not done that yet, a book I...
Self sabotage
Do you self sabotage? If you’d asked me a week ago I’d have told you that I used to, but not anymore. Someone in my counselling class was talking about self-...
What's bringing my joy this week
Trigger warning for transphobia for the first paragraph here. We’ve gone full mask off transphobia in the UK via a Supreme Court ruling that makes no sense,...
Sitting with success
How easy is it for you to give yourself a compliment without caveats? I searched my archives to see the last time I’d spoken about given yourself compliments...
What are your warning signs?
April is Stress Awareness Month in the UK, are you aware of your stress? I don’t think I know many people who aren’t fully aware of their stress given...
Trust and control
Collaboration means giving up some form of control, right? If you’re collaborating, you’re letting someone else in, exploring something in a participatory...
How do I show myself love?
Every new encounter presents a challenge to the counsellor’s ability to offer [them]selves as someone who is prepared to enter into relational depth and who...
Sitting with silence
I know the last few weeks have been patchy for newsletters, life has been a bit intense to be honest. I appreciate your patience and grace while I work...
Receiving feedback and self talk
When you receive feedback, what do you think? Who does the person giving you feedback remind you of? What do you want from them? What do you think they want...
I met my younger self
I meet my younger self often, I sit with her in therapy sessions. I listen to my teen self scream at me when I make a decision she thinks is too risky. I...
Free post: Rest as retoration
Once every few months, I pull the paywall off an older, pid post, both to give myself a break, but also to give you all what kind of thing you can get it you...
On Anxiety
I’ve been vacillating on what I want to write this week. That’s why this email is later than normal. This is partly because of gestures at the world but also...
Remember how far you've come
I saw this tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@taradefrancisco/video/7459977428161580331?_r=1&_t=ZG-8tDjl0ZUano For people who don’t want to go to tiktok, the...
Reframing as self-compassion
I wanted to share some questions I ask myself when I’m having trouble doing a task that I need to do at some point (especially if there’s a deadline), while...
What's the difference between therapy and a chat?
I want to put up here that I’m only training in person-centred therapy, and different modalities have different ways of working and practicing. When I say...
Making different choices
I want to talk about making the choice to do something differently. This reflection started during recovery from surgery, and it seems relevant given we’re...
