Let's talk about Mindfulness
Note: I'm not sure I managed to schedule this to go out on Wednesday as normal. Sending this out now as a test, apologies if you receive it twice.
I've been talking about Mindfulness a few times recently, so I wanted to share what I've been saying here. This is a free post, so please share with people you feel would find this useful.
Mind describes Mindfulness as a technique you can learn which involves noticing what's happening in the present moment, without judgement. You might take notice and be aware of your mind, body or surroundings.
Its a way of being with yourself with acceptance. No judgement or trying to change, but neutrally noticing and accepting what’s going on in your present time.
Mindfulness was (and still is) prescribed as a one size fits all mental health treatment method. The reality is more complicated than that.
Let’s start with why mindfulness is seen as a good thing for mental health.
Things mindfulness can help with:
Building resilience
Practicing accepting feelings can help you move through them. Not every feeling can (or should) be acted upon, and sometimes you have to sit with, and accept your feelings. This is a core part of resilience, the ability to move through feelings, knowing you’ll be okay on the other side. Mindfulness practice can help with this.
Being kinder to yourself
Starting from a position of neutrality can help with kindness. If you’re used to being mean to yourself, or feeling horrible about things (if you have any type of chronic pain or mental health issue, you may be familiar with feeling angry, or betrayed, or hopeless), then being kind or positive might feel like a stretch too far. Moving to neutral acceptance can help reset your inner monologue a bit, and feel easier and more congruent than forced positivity.
Being able to choose responses to your thoughts and feelings.
Sometimes our brains are deeply unhelpful. Sometimes our feelings are so overwhelming it feels like we can’t do or see anything other than our feelings. This can make it difficult to exist or respond in a helpful way to these thoughts and feelings. Mindfulness can help us remember to take a step back, and get some space so we can respond in a useful way.
This all sounds great, what’s the problem?
Mindfulness comes in many different forms, and a lot of these involve being very aware of your physical presence. It’s being aware of sensations and noticing and accepting them.
You think about sensations as you breathe, or think about specific parts of your body in turn.
This kind of mindfulness isn’t necessarily helpful for people who have breathing issues, or who’s body is not a comfortable space for them (people with chronic health conditions or pain, people with body dysmorphia, people with sensory issues that may be triggered by this kind of awareness, for example).
I did a breathworks course on chronic pain where we learned to be in our bodies kindly, even when we were in pain. It was something we covered in a course with instructors, and peer support discussion. It can be a lot to try by yourself, without that support.
I want to talk about more external forms of mindfulness. Going for a walk and paying attention to your surroundings, whether that be birds and flowers, or graffiti and architecture, you can notice things. A lot of articles will tell you to go out without headphones, those people are doing what works for them, but it could never be me. I’m out with my headphones, or at the very least my loops. Sometimes I’ll go for a minute or two without anything playing, and listening to the noise of my walk but the world is loud, and I am sensitive, so background music or the dulling of that noise is a must for me.
Yoga or other stretches can be really mindful. For me it means I’m aware of my body in a more neutral way, as it’s about moving and balance rather than any kind of sensations necessarily. It’s easier for me to be more neutral when I’m doing these things (especially as I know how helpful these are for my chronic pain).
Exercise like running or swimming might be a way for you to be mindful. Before my hip issue, pole dancing was a way for me to be mindful because I was fully in my body and learning how to move it, but it was really neutral for me, rather than a failing (mostly because pole is so far removed from day to day movements that I can’t really make a judgement on how well I’m doing).
Colouring or other gentle crafting is also a way to be mindful in a way that’s a bit more external. This is why colouring was bit a few years ago. It’s away of being quiet and with yourself. There are lots of variants here: colouring, colour by numbers if you want the stress of deciding on colours removed, diamond art, reverse colouring. I personally want to see the come back of velvet art https://velvetart.co.uk/ which makes keeping in the lines super easy, because the lines are raised and velvety.
The point is that if you want to experiment with mindfulness, there are a few different ways to do it.
When people talk about mindfulness, I don’t think they necessarily talk about the purpose of mindfulness, which is to be present with yourself in a neutral way. When you start from this place, rather than starting from the methods, you might find ways to be able to engage with yourself from a place of neutralness, rather than feel like there’s no way for you to be safely mindful.
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