Let's do some reflecting and a small announcement
The announcement is I'm taking time off for Christmas, no big.
It’s that time of year, where we look back and reflect, and look forward to the new year. The line between years is arbitrary but useful. A signal for us to pause and take stock in a larger way than we maybe do at other times of year.
Here are some prompts I’m using to reflect on 2023:
Describe your year in 4-6 words
What surprised you about this year? How does that make you feel?
Baggage: What do you want to carry forward? What do you want to leave behind?
What brought you joy this year?
Hopes and fears for 2024: how do we prep for these?
What word or phrase do we want to take into 2024 as an affirmation?
I like these questions because they invite gentle but deep reflection. What surprised you and how do you feel about that surprise. Yes, think about your feelings about the thing that surprised you, but thinking about how you feel about that surprise can lead to some deeper insights.
My 2023 has been: a rollercoaster, full of decisions and surprises. Some good, like starting this substack, finding consistent writing (and that people want to read my writing!) have been wonderful. Some less so, it’s been a tough year for a lot of self-employed folk, and I’m no exception.
Much like my surprise has been a rollercoaster, my feelings on the surprises and the year are also up and down. On the one hand I’ve done a whole bunch of stuff, started writing a book, published 47 pieces of writing here on substack, started coaching people, done workshops at conferences and organisations. All of these are things i’m incredibly proud of, and am hoping to carry this action forward.
On the other hand, there’s the things that didn’t go well, or were unpleasant surprises. redundancy is never a fun time, even if it led me to this. Suddenly being the only person at your work, the final decision maker and responsible person is difficult. I’ve definitely struggled with not having co-workers, which is compounded with feeling like I need to constantly be visible online. It’s a weird mix of isolation but not private?
When I sit with these surprises, I feel a mixture of pride, motivation, and a bit of dread. I want to take my lessons forward with kind accountability, and move forward. I don’t want to stagnate with these feelings, nor do I want to ignore the bad and only push forward with that motivation, lest I fall into the same traps or keep moving forward into the kind of overwork that leads to burn out.
I want to carry forward my network, my consistent writing, and my learning. I started the next course of my therapy journey in September, which I’m really enjoying, and I want to bring some of that reflection into my writing. I’m resilient, finding it easier to bounce back from not getting things than I expected (crafting markets not selling much due to bad weather, events not being as well attended as I’d like, etc). This is something I need when building a business, especially one that is just me.
I want to leave behind my ability to get in my own way, and stop myself from doing things. I have a day of content filming planned for the day this comes out (with an actual content creation person), which will hopefully get over my block of making videos. I find myself tripping over my words the minute I try to talk into a camera, needing to take multiple takes, even if I write things out. I think I’m not used to looking at myself yet. I need to get over this if I’m to film courses, though I can do voice overs for those, if I need to.
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Things that brought me joy this year: The support of my wonderful friends, loved ones, and wider network. I met some new people, and have some exciting collaborations planned. I’m doing my first solo events, and want to launch my first course at the end of this year/start of next. I also continued my love of fiction reading, found some excellent games (board and video), and continued my self care.
Hopes and fears: My hopes are I continue to grow SCB into a flourishing business, one that pays for itself, and pays me. I hope I continue to grow and reflect. I hope to finish my book.
Fears: That the above won’t happen. That SCB will languish and fade, despite my best efforts. Or that I fail my course. Or I stack too much on top of myself and burn myself out.
Preparing for these is a balancing act. I have a really busy couple of weeks, but all of it will contribute to the future. I need to plan how to keep that momentum going, while building in breaks. I have some habits that are holdovers from when I was working full time and putting out a podcast: I always take one weekend day off properly, and I try to go to the cinema so I can’t be online. I take time to read fiction, because I know for me only reading non-fiction makes me not want to read.
The word I want to take into 2024 is something about consistency. Consistently writing, being in my community, putting things on social media, looking after myself. It’s something I struggle with, but as this substack has proven, I can do it. I’ve already got a lot of writing planned for next year already, and I plan to work on getting posts scheduled in advance over the next few weeks.
To that end, I’m going to be taking two weeks off over the Christmas period. This means there won’t be a post on 20th or 27th December, and I’ll be back on 3rd Jan with some brand new exciting writing (I have plans for a new series about therapy theory and the way of being in therapy).
In the meantime, I’d love to hear from you on your 2024 hopes and fears, or the word you’re carrying into the new year, or anything at all. You can comment here, or drop me an email
I wish you all a wonderful December, regardless of what you’re up to. If you’re a subscriber, you have access to the SCB discord, which is quiet but I have plans for, and is a wonderful warm and supportive place if you need somewhere to hang out.
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