I recently re-shared this post from October 2025: https://buttondown.com/SelfCareBackpack/archive/discomfort-vs-safety/

On tiktok someone left a comment about building resilience, and then we wouldn't need to do this kind of fortune telling and worrying about the future, and while this is true, I wanted to talk more about what this transition looked like for me.

We think of resilience as the ability to withstand things, and that's true, but it's more about how healthily you can withstand things. It's not 'can you withstand things without anyone realising, or asking for help, or taking any moment to breathe'. It's withstanding something without it entirely destroying you long term.

It looks different for everyone, because what's a small thing for one person can be devastating for another, depending on their situation, history, etc. But overall, it's about being about to weather a storm. Sometimes that's as easy as looking out the window and commenting on the weather, sometimes you need to go out in it for work or groceries, so you need waterproof clothing, and to dry off when you get back.Sometimes it means taking shelter in a basement. Then there's the aftermath, which could be nothing, could be fixing a leak, could be dealing with the aftermath of flooding, or worse.