Q: Has anyone actually captured an abominable snowman on film?
A: Not yeti!

Since I already offered sage advice last issue, I didn't want to pepper in too many similar puns to spice up this intro, although even without taking the thyme for a serious as-salt I do want to wish you all Seasonings Greetings.

I've got some exciting New Years Eve plans in the form of an exclusive party I had to book months in advance, space was very limited but I managed to get a spot so I will be getting to see... a doctor. Try to contain your envy and/or contempt for the American healthcare system.

UNCONTAINABLE CONTEMPT

It's what the regime has for you, and what I have for them.

Healthcare is as good an example as any, as emblematized by RFK's extreme makeover of the CDC where he removed all those unsightly scientists (with very plain things like ethics) to replace them with people with more agreeable smiles (meaning they'll smile and agree with whatever he wants). That's the topic of this week's column, a holiday-appropriate parody of

• 'Twas the Night...

  'Twas the night before Christmas at the CDC,
  No researchers were stirring, not even a flea;
  They were home in their beds, not because they were tired,
  But because hundreds of them were recently fired.

  ...

  Way back in 2000, Measles was ill-fated.
  From our whole country, it had been eliminated.
  Vaccinations are how this great feat was arranged.
  "But what if," said a voice, "it's time for a change?"

  Disregard for vaccines that kept measles away?
  I knew instantly that it must be RFK!
  He hates vaccines a lot! He wants mandates removed!
  All diseases, like that, saw their futures improved!

  "Now, Measles! Now, Mumps! And now Whooping Cough too!
  On, TB! Scarlet Fever! On, more strains of flu!
  You'd been eliminated by docs that were mean!
  Now spread away! Spread away! No more vaccines!"

  As water that flows with no roadblock or barrier,
  The diseases spread rapidly, finding new carriers;
  There was no herd immunity left in the nation,
  As we'd scrapped the mandated childhood vaccination.

Yep, that's been pretty consistently his thing and even just in the past week or two he's been pushing this further. This year has been at least a decade long and boy do I hope we can turn things around in 2026.

Of course, I don't want to give the impression that RFK is dangerous just because he wants to eliminate all vaccines and scientific rigor to let disease run rampant. (It's like "But wait there's more" for horrors)(RFK is the new Shamwow guy)(because his health policy is a sham and when you hear it you're like "Woooooowwww")(derogatory) He also is one of the leading figures in the regime's War on Different.

ONE STEPFORD WARD, TWO STEPS BACK

I know I already wrote about the War on Different a couple months ago, but I do think it's useful to view RFK's attacks on trans people and autistic people and ICE's assaults on immigrants and non-white citizens and the vast apparatus deployed to destroy DEI and the arts as all part of the same project, to create a homogenized obedient populace that exists only to serve the interests of the ruling class, rather than having any personality or existence of their own. (a nation of Mike Johnsons, if you will)(and I certainly hope you won't.)

It may be old hat to metaphor the government as relationship (heck, it may be old hat to say old hat)(no cap), but I think the current regime very much wants a citizenry of Stepford Wives, just a homogenized reliable cookie-cutter series of robots that don't have wants or needs of their own and can make things nicer for those big important men making all the money.

I even suspect this is not entirely unrelated to the War on Empathy, because empathy involves seeing other people as people, and then you might have to acknowledge that they have their own hopes and dreams and lives that have intrinsic value, which runs counter to just having them exist to serve your needs (or shoveling them into mass graves when they're on inconvenient real estate). They want servants or removable obstacles, not people with their own lives, which is why they keep insisting all these people are not-people; because Not-people can exist purely for your convenience or can be brutalized without consequence.

Acknowledging all people as people is, as I've said before, a foundational moral principle for me (and also hopefully for you) and I think even just getting most of the country to re-acknowledge that most basic moral tenet (oh, I finally saw Tenet recently. It was weird but good; somehow the past decade saw a rush of mind-bendy sci-fi like Inception)(dammit, I just looked it up and Inception was 15 years ago. Why does time never work right?)(also addressed in those sci-fi movies)(oh right, country acknowledging...) would naturally mean rejecting some of the current inhumanity, which would sure be nice.

O, THE INHUMANITY

One day I will write a whole newsletter that doesn't rant about AI but today ain't it. I have to share that one of my teacher friends recently received a spam pitch for an AI-powered automated grading software which would grade student essays while automatically scanning them for things like plagiarism and AI usage.

The call is coming from inside the house!

I think we've tried to make everything quantified and automated when humanity requires the opposite. Which is why I'm coming around to the opinion that maybe the worst thing to happen to social media was the Like. (I mean clearly it wasn't; advertising in general or even just Elon Musk as a person are all worse things, but it's still bad so stick with me.) Back in the LiveJournal days, we wrote long things and shared our lives and got in-depth comments from friends and had conversations (which is why Dreamwidth is still the best social media and I salute the three friends of mine who actually use it)(and also I'm a giant hypocrite because I still don't use it) (although in my defense I don't have the spoons to be on many platforms so one where I have 3 friends won't outprioritize Facebook even though I hate Facebook)

But then came the Like, and then people started quantifying posts, and we want things optimized for Likes, and we can count how many it got, and suddenly instead of aiming for human connection we're trying to make numbers go up. And I think when we stop focusing on people as people, and start viewing them as numbers we're trying to maximize, we lose a little humanity and it makes the world a worse place.

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NEW YEAR, SAME ME

That about wraps things up for the final newsletter of 2025. Allan Sherman and I wish you a happy new year, and hopefully 2026 will be a year of positive change. (it's about dime.) As always, I thank you for reading*, will be back in two weeks with another column, and I hope you enjoy the dwindling days of 2025. Here's to a better year for all of us.

*(I realize I say it every newsletter but I really do thank you for reading; both because having readers in general inspires me to keep writing, and specifically because knowing that some of my favorite people from across the decades of my life still want to read my rambly thoughts is very affirming.)(or maybe you don't want to read them but subscribed anyway; the important thing is that the numbers go up)(help I'm a robot)(maybe I should make a new years resolution not to immediately undercut every serious point I make with a predictable joke)(maybe next next year)(In the words of St. Augustine, "No, I don't HAVE a Hippo".)(at least now you know what to get him for Christmas next year)(oops, I missed my resolution segue)(we're just waiting for it to come 'round again on the guitar)(I resolve to have a better joke next year)

Resolutely,
Seth