[difficult people] - 16. Stress Less: Strategies for Managing
Dealing with Difficult People
##Dealing with Stress
Ongoing dealings with difficult people will inevitably increase your stress levels. What can be done about that?
Finding Your Calm: A Story About Workplace Stress
Alex used to love Mondays. That was before Rachel joined the team. Now, Sunday evenings were filled with a familiar knot in his stomach as he thought about another week of navigating her constant criticism and territorial behaviour. The projects they shared always seemed to turn into battlegrounds, with Rachel questioning his every decision in team meetings and sending passive-aggressive emails copied to their manager.
One particularly rough Tuesday, after Rachel had dismissed his market research findings in front of a client, Alex found himself hiding in the stairwell, heart racing, trying to calm down. His hands were shaking as he texted his friend: "I can't do this anymore."
That evening, instead of working late to re-do the research (again), Alex decided something had to change. Not Rachel – he'd tried that route and realised he couldn't control her behaviour. What he could control was his response to it.
He started small. First, he blocked off 15 minutes before any meeting with Rachel to review his notes and centre himself. He began taking lunch breaks away from his desk, using the time to walk around the block and clear his head. When Rachel's emails triggered his anxiety, he waited an hour before responding, giving himself time to craft a professional response rather than an emotional reaction.
The real breakthrough came when Alex started working with his manager on setting clearer project boundaries. They established a documentation protocol that made decision-making processes more transparent. This meant Rachel's last-minute changes needed proper justification, not just criticism.
Alex also found an unexpected ally in his company's wellness program. The weekly meditation sessions he once considered "fluffy" became valuable tools for managing stress. He learned to recognise his stress signals earlier – the tight shoulders, the clenched jaw – and address them before they escalated.
Not all approaches will work for everyone, and you may not feel comfortable with all suggestions. But being able to regulate your emotions is a core starting point.
Practical Stress Management Strategies:
Control What You Can
Create structured routines
Document important decisions
Plan responses to common situations
Protect Your Space
Set email boundaries
Take real breaks
Create buffer time between meetings
Build Your Support System
Find trusted colleagues
Connect with mentors
Consider professional guidance
Make Self-Care Non-Negotiable
Schedule movement breaks
Protect your lunch hour
Maintain outside interests
Develop Your Toolkit
Practice breathing exercises
Learn grounding techniques
Find healthy stress outlets
Daily Practices to Try:
Morning:
Take 5 minutes to plan your day
Identify potential stress points
Set one boundary you'll maintain
During Work:
Take three deep breaths before difficult conversations
Step away when you feel overwhelmed
Stay hydrated and move regularly
Evening:
Create a work-shutdown ritual
Release work thoughts through exercise or journaling
Focus on what went well, not just challenges
Remember:
Stress from difficult workplace relationships isn't just "part of the job." It's a real challenge that requires real solutions. Your well-being matters, and taking steps to protect it isn't selfish – it's essential for sustainable career success.
Want to get started? Choose one small change you can make tomorrow. Maybe it's a five-minute breathing break, a lunchtime walk, or turning off email notifications after hours. Small steps, consistently taken, lead to significant changes in how we handle workplace stress.
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