Fallow Era - Why Am I Making This? Issue #27
Hey there. It’s Julien. Artist as usual. I enjoy the current online trend of saying “I’m in my ______ era”, as though we are all pop stars preparing to release new albums or go on tour. That’s the sense in which I say “fallow era”.
“Fallow” usually describes a field or farmland - “usually cultivated land that is allowed to lie idle during the growing season”, often to let the land regain nutrients. It’s a bittersweet concept metaphorically and visually, a cold empty field with no crops, the logical conclusion to the necessity of rest. It’s also often used as a metaphor for unrealized potential, unused ideas. I learned the word when I was at university, struggling, listening to the album Middle Cyclone by Neko Case. The word appears in the beautiful song “The Next Time You Say Forever”.
I talked about burnout and resting in my previous newsletter, and I have followed up on that throughout September by being generally aimless. It’s good but not great (as expected) and am generally just keeping on keeping on. But I do have a couple of small updates on fun things I’ve been up to this month.
Umineko
Remember that 1 million word visual novel I read back in April through June of this year? I’m rereading it with my partner because I want to be able to talk about it with another person and it’s pretty hard to convince anyone to read 1 million words of anime BS without sitting down with them and reading it together. Anyway, I was reminded of how much I love these characters (I actually can’t believe that I didn’t know them at the beginning of this year) and drew pictures of a few of them.
The character in the pink suit in the second image is my fave. I posted it on Instagram and I think it got about 5 likes, which I think means I’m doing a good job taking a break from making art for other people.
NYC trip
My partner and I visited some friends in New York City for a week!! I hadn’t been to the city (or taken a whole week off work for a real vacation... yikes) since 2019, and it was great to see friends, chill out, walk around, eat food, and go shopping. The perfect low-key vacation, I think. I read two whole books while I was there, having read no books (besides Umineko - not a book) for months. They were In The Dream House by Carmen Maria Machado, a memoir in an interesting style that I enjoyed, and Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow by Gabrielle Zevin, which Triple Click did an episode about (haven’t listened yet). Tomorrow x 3 was perfect for me. The characters mean everything to me. I loved it so much. Sam and Sadie, you have my heart.
While I was in New York I also finally understood the New York Bagel Difference. This cinnamon raisin bagel with strawberry cream cheese from Ess-a-Bagel changed my life.
Piano
I have been playing a bunch of piano (I got a keyboard at the end of 2021) since I started piano lessons a couple of weeks ago! For this whole year I have been having a lot of fun plinking out chords and singing songs as I do. (I have really rekindled my love of singing!) It’s hard for me to actually practice the more boring stuff on my own (like learning to read music) without external motivation, so this month I finally took the plunge with lessons.
It is hard to explain how much it has affected my day-to-day life. I’ve never taken music lessons before and it’s so fun and rewarding! (I’m sure I would have been bored and annoyed by them as a kid, though.) Genuinely, piano lessons have brought me the more day-to-day enthusiasm for life than anything else in months. It’s fun to practice and feel my fingers get better at making nice sounds. Plus, this is a hobby I absolutely cannot monetize anytime soon, and that is a relief!
Ok, that’s it. Three things I have been doing for myself, for fun. I have some photography gigs scheduled for next month but I really believe that it will be low-key. Pottery continues as always. Life carries on and there is fun to be had even through periods of doldrums and disappointments. Take care of yourselves!
Julien