too much water

i am sorry i drowned you
in your sorrows
and watched helplessly as you turned pale green
then yellow
then brown
i willed you to recover
but we wanted different things
into the green bin with you
aloe, goodbye

weird

merge

extraction

and so with great force the tooth was ripped from the gum
in which it had slept for two decades
and while in its sleep it did cast great terrors upon her mouth
she is wounded, but she is victorious
(i swear i heard my skull crack more than once)

weird

the future of web development is

find your tribe

we are all tribal beings, really
deep down
and when you find your tribe
(because you will find your tribe)
hold onto them
nurture them
love them
lift them up
laugh with them
build cool stuff with them
for they will enjoy doing the same

weird

i have no idea what this is but i like it

i have not been scrolling

i have not been scrolling
i have been looking at the trees
i have not been scrolling
i have been listening to the birds
i have not been scrolling
i have been breathing intentionally
i have not been scrolling
i have been moving my body
i have not been scrolling
i have been resting
i have not been scrolling
i have been travelling to see friends
i have not been scrolling

weird

coffee is not breakfast

friends

friends are like plants
give them light
water
dust them off
a little spray
and they will give you life
and take away the bad things
take care of them

weird

guis are the future

i am not an outsider

there are people that tolerate me
there are people that like me
there are people that actively seek out my company
there are people that cheer for me
there are people that love me
there are people that would be sad without me
repeat

weird

clickens

technology is broken

in the airport
airport internet is broken
hot-spotting data from my phone
want to view a website on the wayback machine
no, not allowed
archived materials are for grown ups
(according to my phone plan provider)
my phone plan provider has my date of birth
but now they want real proof of my digits
i enter my passport numbers, yes numbers plural
(the ones with the chevrons?? i had to type the chevrons??)
text message received
"thank you, you might need to wait 24 hours for the changes to take effect"
i quit

weird

get dressed

i wish for you

i see you
and i hope for you
i see you
and i smile for you
i see you
and i want for you
i see you
and i wish for you
i only wish good things for you

weird

this was a different place 14 years ago

hydrate

hydrate
when you are sad
hydrate
when you are tired
hydrate
when you are bored
hydrate
like your life depends on it
hydrate
because it does
hydrate
friend
hydrate

hydrate

weird

an annual journal of literature made to exist on the web

object constancy

const object: unknown = {  
  infant: "understands their caregiver exists, even when out of sight",
  child: "maintains a positive view of a parent, even when they are upset",
  adult: "preserves emotional connection with a partner, even when things are weird",
} 

weird

a website that seems to beckon you to explore it

travelling

why is it that when i travel
it takes up all the space in my head
it’s just a short trip
but what if i forget something
what if i get lost
but
what if
i enjoy it?

weird

it's for security

newness

shiny new experiences
bring shiny new feelings
warmth and hope and ambition
and drive
hold on to this
hold on
it’s worth it
and so are you
just drive

weird

the room starts to shimmer at the edges of my vision

the door

i know you feel trapped
sometimes
i know it’s hard
right now
you’re hurting in this room
where all you can do is gaze
out of the window
that’s locked
and dirty
and small
but if there wasn’t a way out
you wouldn’t have found a way in
and sometimes
all you need to do
is turn around
and find the door

weird

look at this

this is me from the past

hello from me from the past
i wrote these words last week

everything is from the past
nothing is from the future
everything is a memory
existing, then fading, then gone

in this moment we are all memories
i am a memory of you
you are a memory of me
we are past
and present
but never future
now

weird

with love to electrical trans sisters

in seven years

who will you be
in seven years?
what will you do
for seven years?
if all that is left
is seven years
what would you change, today?

weird

this is not an actual island

moderate your exposure to bullshit

consume all the stuff that makes you feel joy
share it so others can feel, and bubble
find it again, again, again
again and again
more, still more
now is the time to love, my love
what else do we have?
but this

weird

not all decisions are technical ones

once you start to feel again

we numb ourselves with thinking
and in turn cause physical pain
we numb ourselves with routine
and forget to enjoy the sky
we numb ourselves with indulgence
and scrolling and scrolling and clicking and scrolling and
we numb ourselves for protection
and lose identity and self
and once you start to feel again
that’s when you start to live
and once you start to feel again
and once you start to feel
and once you start
you become

weird

it is now 89 seconds to midnight

on manifestation

believe
it will be
trust
it will become
act
it will be given
manifest
it will be beautiful

it will
will it

weird

what makes you

what makes you
what makes you
what makes you
you wonder
is it love
is it pain
is it wealth
is it gain
is it none of the above
is it something and nothing
is it worth it
what makes you
you wonder

weird

can you beat the game?

relentless

when one thing ends
another begins
and when that, then, ends
another
but if we will it to stop
will life end, in turn?

weird

it's always in the last place you look

what do you hope for

the collective cries of 'happy new year' make me feel uneasy
i haven't yet figured out why
and so i wish you peace and comfort
and health and wonder
and everything you want to manifest

don’t go anywhere
i need you

weird

i want to be exceptional

you must make space for failure
only then, will you grow

weird

everything digital feels so broken

you are more than what you produce

you are a living being
so live

weird

masked musicians

a commonplace book

i have been collecting too many "ideas" formally, leading to idea overwhelm. and so i acquired a "commonplace book", a blank notebook, a little place to write down passing thoughts, observations, silly things, joyful things. it's tiny so it fits in a coat pocket, i can take it on walks, and carry it in my small handbag. it feels kinda nice.

weird

warning some pages will take too long to load

layers

keyboards are like people layers upon layers we stumble yet we navigate and we ascend you, too, can succeed i'm trying

weird

oh no

untitled

the words will not come today
maybe, tomorrow
and if not then
maybe, soon

soon

weird

when your world is cold

when your world is cold
you may think it dead
but there's life
if you will it

weird

an exploration of digital conversation

ftp

i drag a [F]ile from

[T]his window to that one there

it is [P]erfection

hi?

?

weird

?

you're gonna be ok

apparently if you're worried about something, you should think of something you're thankful for

it moves your brain activity from one place to the other

today, i am thankful for red leaves; they make autumn so nice to look at

everyone has a hole in their life

and everything rests on what you fill yours with

weird

enjoy those minor 7th chords

it's still really, really hard

supporting someone you love through recovery from a very serious illness is hard

really, really hard

but you have to look after yourself

i am not at home

this week, i'm at web unleashed in toronto

if you're also at web unleashed in toronto and you're reading these words, find me and whisper the secret password "secret password" at me in exchange for a limited edition panther sticker from the archives (when they're gone, they're gone)

weird

just remember we die at the end of this

so you should probably just do that thing you’ve been wanting to do

you're right, Marcia

weird

work is meaningless, and it almost killed my husband

work is an exchange of time for money

weird wide web hole will resume next week

take care

everything is ok now

i'll tell you about it soon

this too shall pass

it has to

there is no weird wide web hole today

i am in one

this is not an emergency

we move through life in a blur
same shit
different day
automatons at the mercy of this spinning planet
night day
day night
but then
something happens that
breaks all that
there is no longer space
for everything that was once urgent

now is the time to heal
to live
to be

weird

otnemem

what matters?

weird

about the observation that the quality of programmers is a decreasing function of the density of go to statements in the programs they produce

be well

look after yourselves

time is running out

i love you

the world is noisy

i returned from a spa day that preceded the react norway conference and i felt like a changed woman

i had a new perspective on everything

i was calm, i was free

we live in a bubble

what could the world do with $1.8 million?

this week, it buys a domain name.

i'm disappointed.

what do you want to be when you grow up?

it's a strange question we ask children

we place so much emphasis on labour

but i ask: what do you want to experience when you grow up? what do you want to feel?

i'm having an identity crisis

this happens every so often

not long ago i asked you who you are

and now i'm not sure about me

i don't believe in goals anymore

ticking off tasks is way more satisfying

weird

more web archaology

i believe in data, information

ones and zeroes never lie

weird

apparently something happens when all the checkboxes are checked

meeting expectations is good enough

it's great, actually

i spent my whole life trying to overachieve to make people notice me

turns out all that i ever wanted was to notice myself

time is time

don't waste it

weird

sketches

the game doesn't stop when the stream ends

don't fight it

weird

the web is cooked