I'm in Singapore at the moment! Here's a nice little story to tide you over in the meantime :)

Welcome to the one and only story I have about auditioning for a reality TV show.

I haven't told this story much - it's a bit embarrassing but such is life! Take the good with the bad :D

I auditioned for The Voice.

If I remember correctly, auditions were held at the Caulfield Racecourse in first or second year uni - I wanted to try it out and see how I'd go. Get out of my comfort zone, so to speak.

Pretty sure I told mum I was studying (sorry mum!) so that I could "sneak out" to go try out for the audition. You just know this was the most rebellious thing I'd done in uni :D

I got there what I thought was relatively early (like 9 or 10am? I'm punctual!) and it was already pumping. Got there, got in a line to fill out a form about my details, my songs etc...and already I can see the questions they're asking about my story - I can see they're trying to find the angle.

I'm not proud of it, but I did try to play up my thyroid condition to see if it would get through their #sadmeter. Oh to be in the early 2010s and trying to get on reality TV again!!

After signing up, you get a number, and you wait. I was sat next to two people, only one of whom I remember - she was a Lady Gaga impersonator based somewhere in Lilydale, and she had the most incredible voice. While we were waiting, she sang a stunning rendition of Titanium that was diva-like in strength. I knew she would get in, and I remember trying to watch some episodes of The Voice afterwards to see if she got through - alas, I don't remember. Great memory Vince.

The waiting room itself was packed, full of kids like myself, groups, all nervous, some with instruments, some without. There were groups, duos, bands - it was an entire room of people hoping that something might happen with the audition to help them to stardom. However...

There was a microphone in the front of the room, ostensibly for people to warm up and perform for everyone else. I have a feeling it could have been used to like...intimidate other people?

But really, it became a source of encouragement. Because, I mean, my dear god...I couldn't believe how many...shithouse...versions of "Valerie" I heard during that 1.5hr wait. I don't think I'll ever sit through such a bad series of performances in my life.

This was probably exacerbated by the fact that it was all a capella, but some of the off-pitch, off-rhythm singing was just...incredibly bad. Some people tried to over sing with breathy voices, strong voices, indie voices....and after the 4th rendition I was DONE.

COME ON. Was this really who I was up against? YIKES.

_{(I'm conscious that I'm not the best singer in the world either but SERIOUSLY I think my ears bled...)}

While I waited, I fantasized about my 15 minutes of fame. What would I wear? What would the judges be like? How would I spend all that cold hard cash that I was going to win?- and was jolted out of my reverie by having my number called up.

You go into a line that snakes around into a room branched off a corridor - if you pass, you get to go through to the room at the end of the hallway...otherwise, you get to walk past the line again, but in the opposite direction, dejected. I was behind a young teen who had brought a guitar to play with...and got to see him come back out with his head hanging low, disappointed at his failure.

I chose Bruno Mars' "When I was your man" - difficult to pitch but thought I could bring out the power in the ballad! Also - on the form it said to choose songs that were from like...recent pop songs, but all the songs I loved singing were from the 70's and 80's.

OH WELL.

Anyway, how do you think I went? ;)

Yes, I failed! It was a crappy feeling - being amped up for most of the day, hoping I'd get through, and then failing out. Not much feedback given, but looking back on it now, it was fine. I think I was happy with the fact I actually went out and did something weird and wonderful!

And I've always got YouTube if I really want it hehe.

Ever auditioned for anything? Let me know your story! Misery loves company

Chat soon :)

✔️ Real Life Recommendations

1. Peaches - a really cute bar that's above a great ramen place in the city (Ramen Bankara) as well as a lovely steakhouse (Cheek). It has two main levels - a rooftop bar and a really cozy booth area. I really liked the vibe and most importantly the palette! So many pastels :D

2. Mipung - an all-you-can-eat Korean BBQ place in Nunawading that is supremely great value for money. There are other Japanese buffets that have a similar price point but are not as nice - this was an absolute REVELATION in all-you-can-eat. I felt super satisfied going to this place, and definitely overate because it was SO GOOD. The catch is that you only have 2 hours to eat everything, but that's plenty of time. YUM / 10.

🚌 Adventures on the Information Super-Highway

1. Empty Mall Remixes - this was a fascinating read about how people are remixing old songs to sound like they're playing in an old, empty mall. I know people love to indulge in nostalgia, but wow this is taking it to a new level! It's so interesting that people want to recreate the exact experiences from their childhood to bring back that nostalgia.

2. Can a machine help me write this article? - using new advances in the OpenAI writer GPT-2 and features like Smart Compose in Gmail, what will AI be able to help us do in the future? In a similar vein, someone made this which gives you suggestions of what to write just by giving it a phrase! My favourite mode was changing it to 'Harry Potter' :D

3. The real fake cameras of Toy Story 4 (video) - a fascinating look into how the animators for Toy Story 4 animated different lens effects, as if they were using real-life cameras! I knew nothing about camera lens' but this was a super interesting watch.