Beyond Accessibility: Acceptance & Understanding
Written July 2021
In reflecting about my own issues with accessibility as a child and an adult, and hearing what others have said about their experiences, I've realized something:
We don't just need employers, schools, and other aspects of public life to give us accommodations and become more aware of accessibility issues.
We need everyone to start learning from childhood and beyond that everyone has different needs, and we shouldn't judge others or give them a hard time if they have an accessibility need that's "different" or something we may not immediately understand.
There were so many times beginning when I was a child that I was either too embarrassed to ask for an accommodation that would make me "stand out," or that I did get the accommodation but felt embarrassed the whole time I used it, or that I got unwanted attention and questions from peers who didn't understand and didn't know their comments/questions were rude (or didn't care that they were rude).
Sometimes I was allowed to leave the classroom for various reasons, or go home early. I wasn’t required to take gym class for most of my middle school or high school years because of a diagnosed health issue (Fibromyalgia) that made it more painful and exhausting. I was given more leniency when it came to absences and assignment extensions. All of these accommodations made school a little more bearable than it otherwise would have been with my condition, but I had classmates who felt I was getting special treatment. Because disability, chronic illnesses, 504 plans, and the ADA are not things children and teenagers learn about unless they are dealing with these things themselves.
Even as an adult, the embarrassment of accommodations that may make me "stand out" a little has not fully gone away. In college, before I switched to virtual classes, the classroom chairs were always so uncomfortable, especially with a chronic illness. It made sitting in class often painful. I probably could have asked for some sort of adjustment, like a pillow to put behind me. In fact, looking back now I really wish I had. But nobody else in my classes had pillows on their seats, and I knew I’d stand out. I think I had still internalized the belief that any visible accommodations, no matter how big or small of a deal they were, would just lead to unwanted attention of some sort - from judgmental glances to invasive or condescending questions. It’s terrible that I thought this way, because that’s not how accommodations should be viewed.
In middle school, a neighbor of mine who was in high school told me that all of the accommodations I was given wouldn’t have me prepared for high school or "the real world." The thing is, a lot of disabled people still don’t get the accessibility and accommodations they deserve, in school or employment or anywhere else. But the world that we should have, the world disabled people are fighting for every day, is a world where everyone has their accessibility and accommodation needs met. And schools should do more to prepare kids for that world - by teaching them about disability and accessibility issues, and teaching them to be more accepting of their classmates with disabilities and chronic illnesses who have accommodations that they may not fully understand. And in the process, making disabled and chronically ill people of all ages less self-conscious about their perfectly reasonable needs.