Two Bossy Dames

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October 31, 2014

~Insert Spooky Halloween Title Here~

Sit with this one for a bit, poppets, to make sure you see how TERRIFYING and HALLOWEEN-APPROPRIATE it is!
And there's creepy more where that creepy came from, courtesy of visual artist Kevin Weir. We imagine that #BossyDamesNation is very well aware of the NATIONAL HOLIDAY that today's letter coincides with. Although we agree with Cameron Esposito's edict that Halloween truly belongs to the little gay kid, we are taking her up on her magnanimous offer and borrowing it for a while. #Spooky #Links

The Metropolitan Museum of Art has a hot new exhibit-- "Death Becomes Her"-- on mourning dress from 1815-1915 and your beloved Bossy Dames are desperate to go visit (<--- Margaret is speaking for both Dames here, but with unshakable confidence in her correctness. <--- Your faith-in-self is well-placed, dear friend. XOXO Sophie) Margaret is particularly delighted to know that this airy, spangled concoction qualified as mourning because: lavender palettes and black netting, duh. In further #GothNews, Vice Magazine shared a deeply important photo essay on the difficulty of maintaining your pallid elegance when visiting the beach.  Meanwhile, Smithsonian Magazine further endeared itself to us both by compiling a list of the world's most beautiful cemeteries, like Romania's "merry cemetery" (pictured above) where colorful wooden crosses are emblazoned with adorably caustic eulogies, like this one, on the grave marker of a well-known womanizer-- "One more thing I loved very much, To sit at a table in a bar, Next to someone else's wife." That's some Dorothy Parker-level sass, right there. The only nit Margaret would want to pick with this article is that it does not mention Mount Auburn Cemetery in Cambridge, her personal favorite cemetery, or its many wonderful stone dog grave markers. (The Milmore Dog, with his glass box and label of "Their Favorite," is also Margaret's favorite.) 

Moving on from graves to ghosties, New York Magazine spoke to California's pre-eminent Realtor of Haunted Houses about the how she goes about selling such re-SPECTER-ble property. Her methods include "a team of psychics, mediums, and clergy" but INEXPLICABLY she does not yet have a reality TV show on Bravo called "Love It or Haunt It?" FIX THIS TRAVESTY BRAVO. Hopefully, none of the properties she's sold have ended up inspiring scary stories, like these terrifying ones from Jezebel readers. And, before we leave ghosts, Margaret must re-share a couple things the Dames have praised before: Malllory Ortberg's unexpectedly heartbreaking Text Messages from a Ghost series (Part 1; Part 2) and The Memory Palace episode on the Fox sisters, America's first spiritualist mediums. 
 Twee as Hell & Loving It:
Corgis in costumes! Not a drill! Kate Beaton's Wee The People drawings are now available as high-quality vinyl stickers and pins!More Halloween pet cuteness! Daily Bunny's annual round-ups are not to be missed. BABY! BOY! DRESSED! AS! RUTH! BADER! GINSBURG!


Sunrise, Sunset

Sophie's Grandma Zelda's funeral was held on Halloween a few years ago, which felt oddly appropriate, since it was a holiday she'd always really gotten into. She was the grandma who baked & iced jack o'lantern cookies for her grandkids' entire class, and was the little old lady on our block who was known for being deeply apologetic after she'd made some hapless Spider-man or Superman cry with her terrifying witch routine. She could be scary, but look how much fun she was! 
Witchy vampire ladies!

(Margaret is FLOORED by how much Tiny Sophie looks like Present-Day Nell.)


In the spirit of Grandma Zelda and her fun scariness, we bring you the truly horrifying Halloween costumes of yore, creepy-ass Halloween postcards, the spookiest kitsch money can buy, and, of course, Sophie's favorite Halloween jam, "Werewolf Bar Mitzvah". (And if you haven't listened to Songza's Ultimate Halloween Party mix, you need to make time in your life for it, because it is pure, hellaciously boogeyful glory. GLORY.) 
 


Unrelated to Anything Else Herein, But Delightful to Us & Therefore Maybe To You, Too

Can we brag for a moment? Your Dames are Moderately Famous Broads. First, Margaret was a (VERY) special guest on the hilarious lit podcastWorst Besteller, dropping a metric ton of knowledge & insights about Queen Beeeyotch Bachelor contestant Courtney Summers. Then! Sophie and her sisters Sarah & Charlotte were featured at the very top ofthe current episode of Call Your Girlfriend, waxing rhapsodic about how much they love the podcast. As one of Ann & Amina'strio of acknowledged superfans, Sophie is totally interpreting this as an early wedding gift to her sister Sarah, who is marrying her best beloved this very weekend! Margaret hopes thatSarah and her husband met as cutely as Sheila E. and her one true love, Prince. And, even though she has never read a SINGLE R.L. Stine book, Margaret really enjoyedthis piece from The Hairpin about the best best villains from his FEAR STREET books. And finally, this tweetcontinues to be perhaps the best thing Margaret and Sophie have seen all week. 
THINK OF THE CATS, folk musicians! THINK OF THE CATS!!!!!! 


Our Readers: The Best Readers
Here are some of the nice things you lovely people say about this newsletter. We super-appreciate your enthusiasm for this endeavor! (Not included below but noted by us: many of you got the 500 Hats of Bartholomew Cubbins reference last week. The cockles of our heart are permanently warmed. Truly, you are our people.) 

Thank you, #twobossydames for helping me get over a no good, very bad day! -- Amanda

Just about everything in the latest #twobossydames newsletter is Right Up My Alley. #danke -- Anne

New #TwoBossyDames newsletter AND a new @BellwetherFrnds to listen to?? We live in magnificent times, my friends. -- Steve

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