I was prepared to toss this book aside, as on first glance, it appeared to be just another predictable story about someone getting divorced in midlife and trying to find their way. It gets off to a slow start, but Fleischmann is in trouble becomes a deeply insightful book.
I'm going to cite this blurb from Elizabeth Gilbert, is it really captures the essence of the work very succinctly.
This portrait of modern love and marriage is blisteringly funny, searingly accurate, wincingly painful, and ultimately – both heartbreaking and humane. It reminds me of the great novels of the 1960s and 70s – just a short of thing that Philip Roth or John Updike might have produced in their prime (except, of course, that the author understands women).
As people familiar with my way of thinking will recognize, I'm not a fan of art that shouts its identity or politically correct bona fides. If you've not seen Chris Rock's parody of gangsta rap culture, CB4, it might still hold up. I've not seen it for some time. (Any excuse to include this awesome clip.)
I think the best work carries self-awareness with it, but doesn't hit you over the head with moralizing, or trying to score cheap points.
That said, I still think it's noteworthy that this is a woman-authored book, as it is unflinching in its portrayal of gender. Everyone comes out looking good and bad, beautiful and flawed, like the human beings they are.
Why are the most desirable communities also the most expensive?
Every advocate for making urban design more [pick one: walkable, bikeable, beautiful, lovable, inviting, human-scale] has at some point or another faced the charge of elitism. Virtually every feature of public space that makes it more pleasant to linger in, stroll through, or simply view, has at some point been associated by someone with gentrification, or simply culturally coded as upscale.
This belief is rooted in the following true observation: The best American examples of top-notch urbanism are mostly places inhabited by well-to-do Americans, and their real-estate prices and rents are usually prohibitive for most others. This includes the majority of places that are currently walkable, bikeable, have attractive human-scale architecture, have attractive greenery, aren't pockmarked with parking lots, and are full of small storefronts suited for local businesses.
The author writes about Milwaukee Ave. in Minneapolis. It was built for the working class, homes of modest size on modest lots. “The houses all have front porches facing a central walkway and lawn, a design which encourages neighborly socialization and a sense of cozy shared space. Car access is via shared parking lots at the end of each block; there is no direct alley or garage access to the individual houses.”
The TL;DR might be: quality urban spaces are both scarce and desirable, which is why they are so expensive, and why people advocating for them may be accused of elitism. But we have this backward. The spaces are substantially less expensive to build than suburban sprawl, but because of their scarcity, they become associated with the few who can afford them.
That raises the question, how does appreciating nice things (Thai food from a family-owned restaurant, community gardens, less polluting electric cars) make one an elitist?
Men and emotional maturity
I simply found this really funny. It reminds me of the many men that I meet who seem trapped in surface-level conversations about sports, technology, or mechanical things. I generally find it harder to develop and sustain strong friendships with men versus women. The former just seem to be less interested.
Music recommendation (and a radio station, too)
Zoe's Shanghai might best be described as jazzy soul with a progressive edge. I mean progressive as in “prog,” not Bernie Sanders, although I appreciate both. In recent years, I have found very little new music that really grabs me. Most things I find too derivative, or just not dynamic enough to motivate multiple listens. Fortunately, this artist fits the bill. I'm also happy to discover xray.fm, a Portland, Oregon radio station with a great show called In Between Daze (lots of previous shows available for listening), which has introduced even jaded Ben to new artists like this one. You can find a few more tracks on YouTube.
Art by Mark Brabant
I love the style of these prints. I have one on my wall, though I am not completely sure it is by this artist. I like the atmosphere and sense of nighttime peace the work portrays, like this one of an ordinary house in a presumably ordinary neighborhood.
Briefly - if you’re tired of hearing or reading all the downers of the day or week, Good news network might help. Stuff like this:
13-Year-old Boy Granted a “Make-A-Wish” and Uses It to Feed the Homeless Every Month for a Year
I’ll bet reading this every day instead of listening to NPR or reading the NY Times is better for the soul.
Closing quote
“35 minutes of music. That's the artistic experience, like watching a television program or a movie. He's making and releasing an album. He was smart enough to know that an album is not your eight most recent songs, your ten most recent songs, or even your ten best songs. An album is a work of art that expresses what you want to say today about who you are, about your view of the world, about your view of yourself, about your view of your relationship with your culture and the times, and your competition.”
