A few years ago, an editor of a publishing house emailed me about how he came across my long-dormant Tumblr page about local history, and asked if I was interested in possibly writing a book about long-gone restaurants in Minneapolis. I took it as a sign that I was finally going to do what I want for a living: researching and writing about local history. Even though restaurants weren't my focus or strong interest in my research, I jumped at the opportunity to acquaint myself with them.

I really enjoyed the researching portion of it. I'd spend hours pouring through databases, coming across old photographs and news articles about the latest and greatest culinary attractions. I also went downtown to the central library's Special Collections department to handle old menus and other ephemera.

Turned out that I liked the researching portion of the process more than the writing. I had difficulty keeping the momentum going once I found a particular topic. And once I found a topic of interest, it was difficult for me to stay on task and not go down other historical rabbit holes. (this was long before I was diagnosed with ADHD and Autism)

After about a third of the way through the project, I threw in the towel. My brain just couldn't commit to something that just felt so daunting. Like old iPhone and MacBook boxes, I've held on to all of the writing and research I did just in case. Will it ever see the light of day again? Doubtful. But I can never close the door on anything entirely.

m u s i c b r e a k

I think I discovered this song on an NTS sub-station a few years ago, though I've been listening to it a lot more lately. It's simple, sorta moody, and - yes - really does sound a lot like "Don't Let Me Down".

I always had a few writing projects taking up space in my head. But I've been quick to dismiss them as impractical or time-consuming. Recently, however, I started brainstorming more and more about one of the ideas and began making an earnest effort to see it through. And while very much still in the planning and research stage, I'm anxious to try and see it through. A lot of that just means getting over myself.

I'm also trying to give myself more grace this time around. Knowing what I know now regarding my (cap)abilities allows me to at least try and make peace with my brain and past trauma, if not outright ignore them. Temporarily.

I've never been able to give myself much grace with anything, let alone with writing. And while I don't want this to turn into a whole "discipline", or something I carve out time to do, I would just like to be a little more regimented - and forgiving - about it.

NOTE

I have no idea how frequent this thing will be sent out, but I'd like to do it weekly at minimum. If you think that's too much (or too little), let me know.

Otherwise: fair warning!