More Frogs and Dogs and Bears and Chickens!
It's been a rough week.
Correction, it's been a fucking rough week.
At the start of this week I thought I might write about New York City, or terrestrial radio, or something else curious and magical. But I am tired and in desperate need of some dopamine. So instead, I'm going to share with you my Top 10 favorite Muppet musical numbers. Maybe it can be a nice distraction for a few minute.
tl;dr: I really love The Muppets.
Honorable Mentions
If you've been to a movie theater this year, you've probably seen the VRBO ad that features "Right Where I Belong" from The Muppets Take Manhattan. And you've likely seen it back to back with either that AirBnB ad featuring "Beautiful Strangers" by Kevin Morby, or that ad for that other identical service whose name is escaping me featuring "You're All I Need to Get By" by Aretha Franklin. Truly, we are in a renaissance of good music in ads for companies where you participate first hand in your local housing crisis.
Wait, this is supposed to be positive! Course correct! Course correct!
(Sidebar- the use of "You're All I Need to Get By" in CODA is phenomenal. Just one of those musical choices that ads a different layer to the story every time you hear it, or don't hear it, as the case may be.)
What were we talking about?
Oh yeah- Right Where I Belong. In a perfect world, this song would obviously be my top choice- its message, it's lyrics, it's structure. Unfortunately, at 1:36 long, it's a painful reminder that none of the songs in Muppets Take Manhattan were given their due. In a perfect world, Somebody's Getting Married would just be a brief interlude into a triumphant Right Where I Belong to celebrate the marriage of Kermit and Miss Piggy. But alas.
So instead, Right Where I Belong and Together Again are going to top my honorable mentions list, alongside:
Okay! Onto the list!
10. We're Doing a Sequel
This song is so goddamn delightful, and the jokes are on point. Swedish Chef's Seventh Seal reference, the dig at the Godfather Pt. III, and the cameo's from Lady Gaga and Tony Bennett. This is some top notch Muppet's show tune buffoonery.
9. Hey a Movie
Yes Gonzo, it is a fantastic beginning. In the same vein as We're Doing a Sequel, the meta opening to The Great Muppet Caper is so goddamn delightful. (Also, this has nothing to do with the musical number, but it's a great time to mention that Kermit and Fozzie being identical twin brothers is such a great bit, and it's only funnier every time they bring it up.)
8. Man or Muppet
I don't think a week goes by that some primal part of me doesn't sing out "Am I a man? Or am I a muppet? If I'm a muppet, then I'm a very manly muppet!"
7. Scrooge
It's tough to pick which Muppet Christmas Carol song sticks out about the rest, but then I imagine Michael Caine sternly walking through a crowd of Muppets hurling insults at him, and then turning to disperse them at the end. Incredible. (Relevant.)
6. A Professional Pirate
Tim Curry is one of the greatest muppets ever to live. "Upstage lads! This is my ooooonly number!"
5. Moving Right Along
"A bear in his natural habitat. A Studebaker." 10/10. Perfect jokes.
4. Miss Piggy's Fantasy
This one is less here for the music and more for the puppetry. The Great Muppet Caper has some of the most inventive puppetry in any of the movies- the bike scene, the hot air balloon, the dance number in The First Time it Happens. I am always stunned by the choreographed swimming routine in Miss Piggy's Fantasy. And I do not think anything will ever be funnier that Charles Grodin and Kermit the Frog having competing operatic overlays.
3. Happiness Hotel
One time I stayed at a hostel in Seattle whose front desk person, I kid you not, looked just like Scooter. But that's besides the point. This song is just so delightful, and manages to be a reflection of the entire Muppets community ethos while also being so goddamn catchy.
2. Rainbow Connection
"Who said that every wish, would be heard and answered, when wished on the morning star? Somebody thought of that, and someone believed it. Look what it's done so far." Brb, crying in the Dazbog Coffee bathroom.
1. Can You Picture That?
Just transcendent. Not just a good Muppet song- a great pieces of folk funk. Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem. The most powerful thing we have is our imagination- it can guide us, it can shape us, it can change our reality. Beat down the walls, begin, believe, behold, begat. That's the kind of energy that I'm trying to manifest.
Jim Henson is one of my creative hero's and inspirations. And while the messages of the movies and songs are simple, they're also hopeful and powerful. And when the problems of the world seem incomprehensibly complicated and impossible- well, I just need a little bit of that hope right now.
"Life's like a movie, write your own ending. Keep believing, keep pretending. We've done just what we set out to do. Thanks to the lovers, the dreamers and you."
Go get a treat. Drink some water. Take care of yourselves.
And eventually, together, we'll find the Rainbow Connection.
~Ponders
Bonus Links~
Musical Performance by The Muppets at Jim Henson's funeral (tears imminent)
Andrew Bird's performance of It's Not Easy Being Green from The Green Album (which also features OK Go doing The Muppet Show Theme Song, and Weezer and Hayley Williams performing Rainbow Connection)
Brian Jay Jones excellent biography of Jim Henson (highly recommend the audio book, performed by Kirby Heyborne, who does spot on voices for Jim and all the muppets.)
Some delightfully funny unscripted banter from Muppet Movie test shots