🍝 Today's Sitdown: Japan's PM vows to stay on despite bruising election loss
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Japan's PM vows to stay on despite bruising election loss
Date: 7/21/2025 Original Source: BBC (https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/c8xvn90yr8go)
TONY SAYS:
So, listen to this… Japan, right? These guys over there, they had an election. A big freakin’ election. And guess what? The ruling party, these Liberal Democratic Party clowns – the LDP, they call themselves – lost their majority in the upper house. The upper house, mind you. It’s like losing a couple of fingers, but not the whole hand… yet.
Their Prime Minister, some guy named Ishiba – sounds like a freakin' delicatessen – he’s saying, “Oh, I’m gonna stay put. Nothing to see here, folks.” The solemnly accepts the “harsh result,” he says. Solemnly, the schmuck. Like it’s a freakin’ funeral. He’s more worried about trade negotiations than his own ass being on the chopping block. Can you believe this guy?
See, they needed fifty seats to keep control of this upper house, two hundred and forty-eight seats in total. They got forty-seven. Forty-seven! It’s like ordering a hundred meatballs and only getting half a dozen – you’re gonna be hungry, and pissed off. The opposition, some Constitutional Democratic Party – sounds like a bunch of pencil-pushers – got twenty-two seats. Pathetic. They're celebrating like they won the freakin' lottery, these losers.
Now, this whole thing is happening because people are pissed. Prices are skyrocketing, like the price of good gabagool, and the Americans are threatening tariffs. They're like, “Hey, Japan, we’re gonna hit you with a tariff so hard, you’ll be speaking English – maybe even Brooklyn English." That’ll scare the cazzo outta them.
This professor, some Hall guy – a lecturer in Japanese studies, he says - spills the beans. Apparently, Ishiba, this Prime Minister, ain’t conservative enough for some of these right-wingers. They miss Abe, the former Prime Minister. This Abe guy, he was a long-timer – Japan’s longest-serving, they say, held the position twice. This Abe must have been a real operator to stick around so long. Two terms, he must have really known how to grease the wheels, eh?
Apparently, these right-wingers think Ishiba's too soft on China, not nationalistic enough. These guys are more extreme than my Uncle Pat’s opinions on anything! Some of the support went to this Sanseito party – a bunch of kooks. Hall says they're spouting off stuff that's never been heard before in the upper house – conspiracy theories, anti-foreign sentiments… the whole nine yards. Sounds like a bunch of whack jobs. They're the type that believe the moon landing was faked and that the earth is flat. Maybe they think the mob is just a bunch of stories too!
This Ishiba – he’s walking a tightrope, see? He’s got these hardliners breathing down his neck, the public’s unhappy, and he’s facing this… situation. This whole thing is a mess, a real cannoli of trouble. We’ll see how long this guy lasts. Maybe he'll last longer than that last business deal with Paulie Walnuts...I highly doubt it. You know, it's like a bad gabagool sandwich – you got all the ingredients, but they just don't taste right together. It's a recipe for disaster.
Capisce?
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