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January 14, 2023

Everyone’s gone chaotic in 2023

We’ve made it to another year! What’re you planning for the new year? Are you just riding it out and seeing what happens?

If you (somehow) haven’t heard me talk about it yet, my EP is out! You can check it out here: https://tcannonfodder.bandcamp.com/album/mesh-network

Let me know what you think of it! I still can’t believe I actually finished it by the end of 2022, it was really close to the wire. Now that it’s over, I’m going to focus on getting it out to more people, listen to music again (when I’m working on my own, I can’t listen to anyone else’s, it’s “fun”), and experiment as I find inspiration. One of the things I personally struggle with is self-promotion, so I’m going to work at it this year, since I believe in this EP.

This week has had some truly bizarre things come across my inbox, so I want to quickly share some links and get to those.

The quick batch of links

  • NPR did a profile on the use of cooking boxes in Italy. They’re used elsewhere, and it would be really cool to see them continue to gain popularity
  • I’ve started Mythic Quest; which is a lot of fun! It’s the limit of what I can do in terms of “Tech comedies;” I’ve never watched Silicon Valley because it’s too close to home. 😬
  • Also working through the His Dark Materials adaptation, now that it’s finished, and boy howdy I’m glad we got an adaptation as strong as this.
  • Brian David Gilbert does it again!

Okay, onto the chaos

We’ve collectively joked that since 2020, we’re becoming increasingly unhinged and generally chaotic. But this week in particular, there’s been a slew of stuff that’s just been...on a whole other level.

I’ll start with this subject line, which I got on Monday. I had food poisoning, and in between sleeping and feeling every atom in my body shudder in a bid for death, Warby Parker sent me the following email:

The subject line reads: "Lets astrology guide you"

No, I did not click it

That same night, while watching Everybody Loves Raymond on TV Land (because if you’re this sick, you might as well crawl back to nostalgia), amid a half-dozen casino app commercials (bad! They’re a sign things are Bad™️!), Take5, TVLand, and the FCC decided this is what needed to be aired

My journaling app decided to be that person at a party in your mid-20s who is really pushy & hyper focused on getting everyone to overshare

Day One asked me "Have you ever been bullied?"

These two are technically from last week; but they’re just so goddamn unhinged that they had to make the cut.

A rambling Instagram ad: "Precise Il is an orthopedic height extension technique that gained popularity thanks to its revolutionary magnetic working principle.
Additionally, being a closed height extension system, it has a low infection rate. The main equipment consists of a nail in the form of an interlocking metal rod which is is inserted through a small incision into the bone canal. After the operation, a special remote control is given to the patient. When this device is placed against the leg, the magnets inside the Precise Il system slowly extend the magnetic motor inside. Thus, as the nail lengthens, the bone lengthens as well.
For more information about the Precise Il height extension technique contact our representatives in your own language:"

I’ve saved this one for last, because every single part of this email makes me cry-laugh tears. I refuse to believe this isn’t actually a Tim Robinson bit. Here’s a PDF copy, because it’s distressingly long: https://www.dropbox.com/s/e2xnnstxlidil59/Discover%20the%20tech%20behind%20UScan.pdf?dl=0

That's all I have; I hope you enjoyed and got just as much whiplash as I did.

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