Sycamore Press June 2024: Ever Heard of GNU Emacs???

Well, it finally happened. A couple nights ago I had (to my recollection) my first teeth-falling-out dream. This coalesced with several other factors spurring me to start a dream journal. I have actually been enjoying lots of vivid dreams lately, although that particular experience was a little too vivid for my tastes. At any rate, there’s so much to tell about my experience of the material plane too, so let’s get into it!

Don’t you realize our bodies could fall apart at any second?

— Car Seat Headrest, “Bodys”

General Life Updates (Away)

This section will probably dominate the newsletter. I have been pretty busy! I traveled to St. Louis for a very successful periodical cicada collecting trip. I was mostly hanging around the Central West End area (+ a little of the WashU campus and beautiful Forest Park), but my overall impression of STL was very positive.

Next, I flew directly to Boston and then bussed to Woods Hole, Massachusetts for a History of Biology seminar. The days were busy — lots of listening and, to a lesser extent, reading and writing and speaking with a group of 25 or so folks, mostly professors in history and philosophy of science with a few biologists mixed in. This was socially exhausting, but I also had lots of time alone in my little (and pretty spartan) dorm (and in old libraries and scenic beachside trails).

Sometimes it was so gray (but still bright) that there were no shadows anywhere, and for some reason it really felt like being in a video game (like Half-Life 2 or something??). It was a deeply reflective trip, but, having been away nearly two weeks by that point, I was eager to be home.

General Life Updates (Home)

Emboldened by all that time away, I embarked on both a shopping frenzy and a small-life-changes spree. I’ll sum this up “lightning round” style:

• Bought a new pair of high-waisted gray/black jeans whose slay factor is well worth a little bit of…constriction. Also got some very cozy denim-ish short-shorts. And a dweeby Debian t-shirt.

• Bought a little Nikon Coolpix S7000 point and shoot as a kind of replacement for my phone camera. It has real optical zoom and real buttons, so it’s already leagues better in my book!

• Cut fabric off the bottoms of a lot of my tees. Not crop-top level, but just a leggier silhoutte. I love it!

• Gave myself a kind of mullet!!! Just a little off the sides — not anything too crazy. It looks so good IMO. Maybe I’ll post some pics to Instragram. I feel v cute!!!!!

• My mouse died, so I got a Trackball mouse which is maybe a little too fun to play with as a stim toy.

  

• Sonora and I reorganized the apartment to be so spacious and tidy!

• Got blackout curtains. Oversleeping a lot now…

• Largely cut, erm, herbal medicine out of my weeknight routine. My sleep is much improved, and I’m making slightly more interesting use of those sometimes soul-crushing after-dark hours.

• Got really into the hackable text editor/IDE/word processor/organizational tool/operating system (kinda) Emacs. It is one of the oldest continually-updated computer programs, and I’m weird about it now.

• Probably lots of other stuff I’m forgetting.

Arts & Entertainment

Oh man. I've been listening to a lot of music, from the instant laid-back good vibes of Jonathan Richman to the avant-prog ear candy of Cheer-Accident and Henry Cow. Also kind of having an (extremely late-blooming) Car Seat Headrest phase ever since I picked up a Twin Fantasy two-in-one CD. I could talk much more about all of these if anyone is curious. I also have lots of blank CDs, so please let me know if you’d like me to make you a little mixtape!! I also want to shout out subscriber and friend of the newsletter Griffin Miller’s New Tape EP, which is streaming now! The opener, “When Does It Kick In?” captures a sort of confusion and disillusionment with which I think many of us are getting all too familiar at this stage of life.

As an aside, June will be the first month since March with no Griffin birthdays that I’m aware of. Not sure what the implications of this are…

I finally finished The Brothers Karamazov (which was amazing), along with a translation of The Changeling by one of my favs, Kenzaburō Ōe (also really good, if a bit slow and ruminative). I’ve got a collection of poetry by Neruda and Vallejo tentatively queued up, but I am very much accepting book recs! Physical books have been such a lifesaver for me these days.

I don’t have much creative to share, in part because of all the travel. But here’s a goofy sign I made for our recycling bin at home:

Reflections

I didn’t watch the Scripps National Spelling Bee this year. It’s not the same. But the seasonal transition it represents has come to pass nonetheless. Anyway, I want to write more in a kind of serious way. I have been trying to write about my own perspective and experiences in my dream journal, in notes that I’m preparing for therapy, etc. I have my first session on Monday. This therapist is non-binary, which feels good. I feel a lot of positive changes going on. Also, I feel like I look really cool and hot these days. But summer can be a boring and lonely time here. Not to mention that work gets quieter, allowing negative and even downright paranoid thoughts about my progress and performance to seep in.

Call me, write me, tag me in stuff — or don’t. I mean, I ain’t the boss of ya. And I hate to come off desperate and needy [LIE]. But seriously, just having you all on the mailing list is huge. I have been on a good trajectory, and I feel that you hold me accountable in some way. Hopefully next month as we look forward to July (and my 25th year, oh God) I will have more good news and Cool Pix to share. I love you! Peace out.

—————————————————————— N.