hello hello
Happy Sunday, friend. It’s kind of hard to believe that this is the sixth newsletter that I’ve sent out. These weeks are truly flying by for me and I’ve been losing track of the dates. I’m still basically good at knowing which day of the week it is, but the fact that we’re in mid-May is surprising.
I’ve been having a lot of conversations recently about the uncertainty of the future. As someone whose years revolve around the academic calendars, I am used to a regular ebb and flow. However, with this school year coming to a close and so many questions about what the fall will bring, I don’t have that regular sense of closure. That seems to be the only reliability of this year, though: nothing is regular.
It’s almost like airport world. Regular rules don’t exist. It’s a strange in-between space in which time is fluid and expectations have shifted. This has actually brought me comfort, though.
I’m a fairly anxious person, and usually live on a steady diet of worries and plans in the attempt to feel a sense of control. However, because everything is so out of control everywhere, I feel like I can sort of let go. I have literally no idea what my work will look like next year, and usually that would make me extremely uncomfortable. Instead, I’m just going with the flow. I’m prepared for the only thing I can predict: uncertainty. It’s kind of cool, seeing what those go-with-the-flow types of folks feel.
Caveat: I may very well be a total mess this next week. My sense of cool could be a grand way of putting off fear. But in the meantime, I’m enjoying it.
prompt #6:
Today’s prompt is basically one huge positive affirmation for yourself. I’m not sure if that’s making you feel excited or fearful, but if you are in the latter camp, trust me and give it a try. You’re going to set a five-minute timer for yourself and write as many things as you can that you love about yourself.
You can talk about your personality, your body, your actions, your accomplishments, etc. Resist the urge to slip in secret put-downs. Resist the urge to say that you are “okay” at something or that xyz is “decent.” The goal is to tap into some enthusiastic endorsement of yourself. If this feels difficult, literally re-write “I love…” at the beginning of every sentence to set yourself up for a genuine self compliment.
You can write in list form, or maybe you want to hone in on a specific story or detail. Totally up to you. When your timer goes off, go take a break and bask in the afterglow of self-love. Then, come back to the piece and decide if it’s going to stand as-is or become the seed that grows into something different.
ashley’s piece:
These legs are strong.
These fingernails are pretty.
Easy to love, to see through strange eyes.
But this body is my own.
Hips, belly, breasts, neck, skin, and hair.
Hard to love, to see through soft eyes.
I’ve released the breath.
Danced and sweated.
Enjoyed all the things I let myself hate in the past.
Savored them, loved them.
She is me, and I am worthy.