Per-mission.
You don’t need permission to be free.
That might sound obvious. But most people I know are still waiting for something, some external sign, some life-altering green light.
Maybe you’ve been waiting too.
Waiting for the pain to pass.
Waiting for someone to make it right.
Waiting for circumstances to change before you can move forward.
Here’s the truth: the permission slip was signed the day you took your first breath.
Permission literally means for the mission.
And the mission?
To become fully, honestly and authentically you.
Not some better version of you. Not the cleaned-up version. Just the real thing. Strong, kind, creative, imperfect, growing. You.
That’s the invitation.
But most of us have been trained to wait for approval. We’ve learned to delay our freedom until we feel more certain. More whole. More ready.
The problem is, that moment doesn’t just arrive.
We have to choose it.
Every week I sit with people carrying pain from the past—trapped in toxic environments, limiting beliefs, emotional habits they never asked for but learned to live with. Some are stuck in cycles they didn’t create but now repeat. Others are weighed down by expectations they never agreed to.
But the good news is this: what’s learned can be unlearned.
You are not hardwired to repeat the past.
You’re wired for growth.
You’re wired for freedom.
Psychologists describe four ways we learn:
– Imprinting – copying what we see.
– Trial and error – learning from experience.
– Insight – connecting the dots.
– Conditioning – reacting without thinking.
Most of what shapes us runs beneath the surface. But when we bring it into the light, we can name it. And, change it.
That’s where freedom begins.
It’s also why forgiveness matters.
I’ve never seen anything destroy relationships faster than unforgiveness. It keeps us tied to past pain. Locked into old identities. It gives the illusion of power, but really, it just drains the life out of us.
And yes, I know how deeply unfair some things really were. I’m not minimizing that.
But forgiveness isn’t about letting someone off the hook.
It’s about letting yourself off the hook.
It’s about refusing to let someone else’s actions define your story any longer.
Forgiveness is a decision to stop living in the pain of what was, and start building something new.
And if you’re thinking, “But I don’t know how to forgive,” here’s a little practice I come back to on the regular:
Write a letter. Say what you need to say. Speak it out loud. Burn it if you need to. Let it go.
You’re not forgiving for them. You’re forgiving for you.
And then there’s worry.
Worry is sneaky. It makes us feel responsible while quietly robbing us of peace, joy, and forward motion. It feeds on uncertainty and keeps us stuck in fear. Tricks our minds into thinking we’re doing something about what’s bothering us.
Here’s the question I ask when I feel worry taking over:
Is this something I can control?
If the answer is yes, then I get to work.
If the answer is no, then I look for where I can influence the situation.
And if I can’t do either, I choose to let it be (which, let’s be honest, is often the hardest part).
But even when I can’t control the situation, I can always take responsibility for how I show up in it.
That’s where real power lives.
True story.
You can change your perspective.
You can change your environment.
You can change your energy.
You can change your response.
You can change.
And when you change, you get your life back.
I’ve learned this the hard way. And I keep learning it every day.
I named my first coaching business Orbiting Normal because I knew the path to freedom doesn’t run through conventional wisdom or staying in line. It’s found in the decision to see life differently. To live differently.
To stop waiting and start becoming.
Here’s the truth my friend:
You are not your past.
You are not your pain.
You are not the worst thing that ever happened to you.
You are becoming.
You are free to change.
You are free to forgive.
You are free to move forward.
And if no one has told you lately, let me tell you the truth:
You have what it takes.
You’re not too late.
You’ve got fight left in you.
You’re allowed to live free. Today.
So maybe this is your moment.
To choose healing.
To choose growth.
To choose freedom.
Not later, amigo. Not when everything lines up. Nope.
Now.
+++
Steve Knox | Augusta, GA
\\\ Thanks for reading. If this stirred something in you, pass it along to someone who might need the reminder. Here’s to choosing freedom, and becoming a voice of hope for others still waiting. Until next week. Be honest. Be you.