Reflection #57 Regrets
The Gap Year: Reflection # 57 Regrets
Part of me is comforted by knowing that my story and life is not unique. But another part still wants to believe my life story is only of itself. No one else has experienced life quite like me. Yet I am humbled to remember that my experience is just mine. So, I continue to question and learn.
Do I have regrets? Certainly. One does not live many years without making mistakes. And I’ve tried to learn from them (not always successfully) and move on. Life deals many challenges from birth to death. At times I handled these challenges well, while other times I used poor judgment, and things did not go so well. Live and learn.
For one, I wouldn’t want to commit again some of the nonsense I engaged in during my thirties and forties, but I don’t want to forget them either. My passions are quieter now. I’ve heard that happens with age. That passion is being replaced with humor, tenderness, and camaraderie.
I forgive myself. I let go of grievances and negativity. I simply don’t have the energy to hold onto ill feelings. It’s easier to forgive, and even better to forget. To forgive me. And mistakes that could never be forgiven, to let them fade away into forgetfulness. In this I’m finding peace.
I think we have to choose to let some things go in order to make space for new adventures, new learnings, and new life. Release, for me, is a spiritual journey, a necessary step to allow generativity to emerge. With luck we can come through it all feeling blessed and ready for whatever lies ahead. Our later years can be our best when we look forward and not past.
Now it’s your turn.
Take time to reflect and, if in a group, share as you feel able.
Today I am more content because I:
continue to live life to the best of my ability.
live with humor, tenderness, and camaraderie.
let go of grievances and negativity.
let some memories fade away into forgetfulness.