Reflection #4. Life Review
Reflection #4 Life Review
“Let nothing disturb thee, let nothing affright thee. All things are passing. Patience obtains all things.” –Teresa of Avila
Recently retired, I find myself in the early stages of a “life review”. I am examining and confronting my past, sometimes courageously and other times in fear and trepidation. I am reviewing both my childhood and adult years, personal and work lives, in search of patterns and connections. I am identifying and reliving decisions made at crucial turning points. Some I celebrate and others I’ve later regretted due to my lack of maturity and foresight. A part of me is still in the past, things that happened years ago, from work and career. Some changes were those that I chose. Other decisions were made by others.
As I tell my story let me be clear. I am not a victim. A victim is someone who has no control or power over their circumstances. As circumstances and situations changed, I made new decisions for my life and the life of my family. In my growing-up years, I was fortunate to live in a nice neighborhood, attend middle-class public schools, and have the support of a loving family. On the other hand, I had little control over some very important events that determined my life and personality, such as my early years in a fundamentalist church and my scoliosis-curved spine. Of course, it can be argued that, as an adult, I did have control over my schooling and employment. Yet now I see that I made choices out of limited knowledge and life patterns— many learned in childhood.
Now we strive to recontextualize our lives. By recontextualizing I mean that I am striving to reframe both my imagined as well as my real mistakes and failures. To put to rest the what-ifs and should-haves of a lifetime to find peace and self-acceptance.
Now it’s your turn.
Take time to reflect and if in a group, share as you feel able.
The statement that best fits is:
a) I’m examining my past-- sometimes courageously and other times hesitantly.
b) I’m identifying and reliving decisions made at crucial turning points.
c) I still think a lot about the past; things that happened years ago.
d) I’m striving to recontextualize my life; to put to rest the what-ifs and should-haves.