Reflection #22 Walk Out of the Room
The Gap Year: Reflection #22 Walk Out of the Room
“Where do we begin? Begin with the heart.” -- Julian of Norwich
How wonderful that I can grant myself the power to walk out of any room I don’t want to be in. When I look back over my life, I recall multiple times when I felt badly treated. A friend lectured me, a boss shamed me, or I was spoken to in a way that made me deeply degraded and embarrassed. In each case, I wish I’d had the fortitude to simply walk out of the room.
Previously if someone vilified me or said untruths about me, I would stew for days. Now, my investment in what others think of me and my self-presentation have lightened. In this period of life, I am not easily intimidated. I can say what I believe, I don’t need to please, keep a job, or be a “team player”. When feeling strong about an issue, I want to stand up and shout and give the world a sturdy shake. I have less interest in defending ego issues. I claim the power to not remain in any situation where I feel neglected, discounted, or disrespected. I rarely walk out, but knowing I have the option makes me feel safer.
Let’s face it. We are too far along in years to allow ourselves to be run by anything except our deliberate intentions and aspirations. It’s time for pruning. To prune is to let go and no longer put ourselves in situations that defeat us. In pruning, we keep what is essential, allowing new growth to emerge. We choose more beneficial options; what options are helpful and what are harmful? In this initial retirement phase, we take inventory of what in our lives brings negativity in any of its many ways. Instead, we have begun to “walk out of the room” and increasingly gravitate toward what’s good and true and beautiful.
Now it’s your turn.
Take time to reflect and if in a group, share as you feel able.
Today I:
a) take inventory of what is helpful and what is harmful to my life.
b) have less interest in defending ego issues.
c) am learning to let go and no longer put myself in situations that defeat me.
d) have the fortitude to walk out of the room.