welcome to my twisted music mind palace.
i was encouraged to start a newsletter by my friends after much back-and-forth from me, because they insisted i have things to share more than i personally believe i do. but i realized that this would be a good opportunity to create something i'd have to regularly revisit and update on a schedule, as part of a routine.
for context: i live with debilitating ADHD. the loss of structure ever since 2020 and later my high school graduation has utterly wrecked my ability to focus and to enforce any sense of routine in myself.
the idea of this newsletter is to give me something to regularly update, at least once a month, on a schedule. so this is mostly for me. but i hope you get some nice music out of it.
establishing some things about this newsletter:
- i don't stream my music (i have a local library) so all music links will be to youtube
- this newsletter will typically (hopefully) be divided into two sections: tracks on loop, and new releases i like or have something to say about. some posts may only have one of these sections.
- again this is mostly a sort of self-help thing for me, but i will have my bad moments, so i cannot guarantee regular posting. HOWEVER, if you happen to enjoy this newsletter and i haven't posted in some time, please reach out to me! i would greatly appreciate the encouragement/kick in the ass to make a new post :)
on loop
songs i keep coming back to.
W's miss love tantei
so i've known and loved this song ever since i first listened to it in 2019, but only very recently did i discover that its intro samples the infamous fake lesbian group t.A.T.u.
this had me in total shock because I KNOW AND LOVE THE FAKE LESBIAN GROUP AND I NEVER NOTICED THIS. but yes, if you listen closely to the intro, that high-pitched noise is the refrain of t.A.T.u's song not gonna get us. what a crazy world we live in.
taylor swift's anti-hero
i am not a swiftie. i am also not a taylor swift hater. i am indifferent and will forever stay that way.
THAT BEING SAID. i first heard anti-hero in a fucking todd in the shadows end of year video, and the vulnerability of it blew me away.
anti-hero is a song only taylor swift could write. and it does have many of her failings, such as inexplicably cringe lines ("my covert narcissism / i disguise as altruism / like some kind of congressman").
but that's what makes this song such a standout; taylor swift is on top of the world, and anti-hero is not a reckoning with that, but an inward retreat into her worst thoughts and momentarily lapse in self-esteem. "it's me, hi / i'm the problem it's me" is one of her best lyrics, full-stop.
also i just adore her voice here? i usually find it quite grating, but the way she shifts from her lower register into a feather-light glide across the chorus makes it all the more powerful.
juice=juice's more mi amore
IDOL ANTHEM OF THE FUCKING YEAR. holy shit.
the music video, and thus this song, premiered in early september 2025, and ever since then and in the lead-up to this single's CD release, it has absolutely exploded in the idol world.
this song has been promoted by the label enough to a point where us fans are in shock that they have half-remembered how to handle even the slightest of viral attention: we've gotten several official youtube uploads of live performances of the song, reinforcing juice=juice's newly elevated status as IDOL VOCAL QUEENS, and they've even appeared on what is likely the most popular modern japanese music industry show, the FIRST TAKE. more mi amore is going places!
it's absolutely delightful to see my favorite idol group (and dambara ruru, my kami-oshi/favorite idol ever, with them) find even the most marginal of success with any song. but for it to be this one is even better, as this is one of their best A-sides in years.
more mi amore is fucking explosive. it starts with rallying cries from kudo yume and arisawa ichika which punch the listener's expectations into the sky, and from that point onward, it does not let up for even a moment. this is a song you scream along to. this is a song you shake ass to. it is everything.
new releases
the latest of 2025.
ROSALÍA's divinize
this section will only have one song because i kind of got too silly in the previous section. also i have not been keeping up with new stuff much at all this year lol
anyway, rosalia's new album is stunning. it is gorgeously produced, with arresting string sections and operatic vocals in certain songs, and rosalia's vocal performances are so beautifully technical that they left me stunned— not because i thought she was incapable of this, but because it suits her so well to be doing runs like what i hear on mio cristo piange diamanti.
i singled out divinize because of two lyrics: "this ghost is still alive / i'm still alive." and not just because of the words sung, but because of her heartbreaking delivery of them. i've been through a ton of shit i'm unwilling to get into on a newsletter, but these two lines really resonated with me. it's some haunting stuff.
but that's not all that this song has! the chorus' relentless build-up in energy reinforces the self-confidence found in the track, with the reminder that she is here— no, made to divinize, becoming more evocative the more it is sung in the track.
this is an album of the year contender for anyone with ears. please give it a listen.