April 2026
Life & thoughts
I've been trying to start this newsletter for a while, but my brain feels very smooth and empty, like the inside of a cracked eggshell. I enjoy that image a lot, except for when I'm trying to actually write something coherent!
Hockey
Last month, I mentioned that we were going to a PWHL Takeover Tour game, which was scheduled for late March in Chicago. Neither of the teams playing were my most beloveds (Montreal Victoire and Toronto Sceptres, in case you were curious) but we both had a great time anyway and the Seattle Torrent won, which is what we were hoping for.
Watching hockey started as a very solitary activity for me, and then R got into it and we started watching some games together. But being in a whole arena full of other fans and yelling with the people next to us about how mad we were that Marie-Philip Poulin is injured was really special. We had some friends over to our house recently to watch a game together, which was also fun!
Not so fun: which team makes the playoffs wil come down to the very last regular season game for Ottawa and Toronto on Saturday. I will be biting my nails anxiously all afternoon.
Pottery
I've also been taking a pottery class, which has been a really interesting and challenging experience. I've been a pretty craft-y person my whole life, and I tend to pick up new skills relatively fast. Not so much with wheel throwing!
I think it's partly because of the way this particular class was set up, but I'm not sure I ever got the fundamentals down, and pottery really relies on the fundamentals. I kept observing my own frustration and thinking, Huh, it's been a long time since I really felt so unsure of my own ability to learn something.
That being said, I feel like I clicked with the process a little more in the last few weeks, so I'm interested to see how my last few pieces come out. I have several to glaze in the last class on Monday—glazing is the part I feel most confident about—and some extra clay left to play around with at home.
Adoption non-news
In other personal news, it's been four years since we started the adoption process and we're still here, waiting. It's really, really hard generally, and especially at the moment. I'm really grateful to everyone we've reached out to recently who's given us understanding, love, and support, and it also feels like a bad sunburn, almost all the time: there, mildly uncomfortable, unless someone or something bumps into it and it flares into pain.
I also feel intensely bored by my own sorrow, and usually try to not talk about it that much, which then translates to feeling both sad and isolated, and annoyed by both.
Pascha
Orthodox Easter, or Pascha, was April 12 this year. We had a lovely service and a lovely gathering at our house. The weather was perfect and the food was delicious. But it was the first Pascha without my godfather and we were all missing him a lot. His joy in the Resurrection was so tangible and infectious and his absence felt (and feels) so huge and impossible. I don’t want to say that the feast was ruined, because it wasn’t, but I cried a lot more than I normally would.
Garden updates
It's hard to write a garden update, because there's so much happening almost every day!
In the flower garden in front, the jonquils are finally done and the irises are about to bloom. Milkweed sprouts are up and lily of the valley are blooming. I bought some blue lobelias and they're such a lovely, rich shade that makes me happy whenever I see them.
In the vegetable/herb garden in the back yard, I've been busily planting seeds and seedlings and harvesting the first of the perennial herbs. Some things didn't make it through the winter, but plenty of others did. We enjoyed more asparagus than ever before, and I did manage to harvest a good round of rhubarb before it bolted. Strawberries and raspberries will be here soon.
I don't really know what I'm doing, when it comes down to it, but every year I learn a little bit more.
Rereading and revisiting
The other day on Bluesky, I linked to an old blog post of mine, where I talked about the pleasures of rereading books. I've been turning it over ever since. At this point, I probably do less rereading than I ever have, but I'm still making a project of working through Diana Wynne Jones' bibliography, and reading Gaudy Night again with some beloved friends.
For me, rereading is, I think, less about the comfort of a familiar story, and more about revisiting the emotional landscape that story has produced in me, and comparing it to what I feel now. Sometimes, I've grown into loving a book even more than I did when I first read it, and sometimes I think, Oh YIKES. Sometimes what I love in a book has shifted, so that the character I used to dislike is now my favorite.
I've also been making a project of rereading my old journals, which started in 1997, when I was 9. It's been an experience. Sometimes funny, sometimes desperately sad, sometimes tender towards my past self, who almost feels like a separate character than Me-Maureen. I guess I've always been circling around what purpose my life has, what legacy I'm leaving behind, who I want to be, and how to be a person in the world. Just small things to chew on!
Links
My blog posts
April 2026 middle grade sff releases
Read these!
Charlie Jane Anders on why Firefly should stay dead (I very much agree)
A grim report from School Library Journal on the effect the current political climate + book banning is having on childrens' publishing
The 2026 Hugo Award finalists have been announced! The nominees include several friends and/or authors I enjoy, although I can't help noticing that the list overall still skews pretty white in the fiction categories.
Jewell Parker Rhodes is creating a new writing fellowship for marginalized writers
Recipe
Spring Confetti Salad
Adapted from Edible Perspective
1/2 T olive oil
1 bunch (about 3/4lb) asparagus, ends trimmed
3 Ts diced onion
2 stalks curly kale, torn from stems + chopped
the stems from the kale
3 cups mixed baby greens
2-3 Ts extra virgin olive oil
3/4 cup chickpeas, rinsed + drained
4oz feta or parmesan cheese
3-4 Ts fresh lemon juice
1/4 cup roasted salted pistachios
salt + pepper
Optional additions: radishes, cucumber, olives, chicken or tuna
Place large saute pan over medium heat with oil. Chop asparagus and kale stems into 2-inch pieces. Add to pan once hot & cook until almost tender & starting to brown. Stir frequently. Add onion & cook, stirring frequently, until golden brown & just tender. 2-3 minutes. Chill in fridge.
Place baby greens in large bowl. Chop your kale & add that to bowl. Add oil & massage into greens. Toss in chickpeas, chilled vegetables , salt, & a hefty grind of black pepper. Add about 3oz of feta & lemon juice & toss/massage into salad.
Empty onto large platter or individual bowls & top with pistachios and an extra scatter of feta.
Wishing you rest & joy,
Maureen