On The Run

I would not stop to use the bathroom. I would not sit down and rest on Classen Avenue outside Lee’s Sandwiches. I would not lay in bed the night before listening to entire episodes of Joe Pera Talks You To Sleep, wide awake, one after the other. I would not go out too fast in the first half run out of energy in the second half.

That was how I was going to run a four-hour marathon, going much faster the second time than I did the first time, three years ago, when I had done all those things.

And to my credit, I did not do them this time. Unfortunately I did not break four hours, either. Even more unfortunately, I did not run faster than 4:20:15, my previous time. I had to fall back to a third goal: finish the race. I did do that.

I’d been training since January—easy runs most days, speed work on Wednesdays, and long runs every Saturday, peaking at 22 miles in late March. I enjoyed it very much. My route went along Joe Creek right outside my neighborhood, then loops around and joins up with the River Parks trail, right along the Arkansas, up to The Gathering Place and eventually Route 66. I got to be out there five or six days a week. I saw the leaves grow. I saw some of the same people, a lot of my friends. Becky would note that I went “corpse mode” after those long runs, curled up on the couch or in the bathtub, but I enjoyed that too. It felt great to have use up everything I had.

To run 26.2 miles in four hours flat, I needed to run a mile every nine minutes and nine seconds, on average. My plan was to hit that pace exactly during the first half of the race, leaving enough in the tank to move up to nine-minute miles—the pace I had been practicing all spring—for the second half. The conventional wisdom is that you can always push harder down the stretch, unless you’ve already used up all your energy.

In 2023, that’s exactly what happened: I was aiming for sub-4 and flying for thirteen miles, pace in the 8:40 range, and then I hit a wall, stopped to walk, and never recovered my original speed.

This time, I successfully held back in the first half; despite the adrenaline and the energy of the crowds, I went slower than I felt like I could. At the halfway point I’m feeling okay, then I try to pick up the pace and can’t. At mile 16 I give up my goal of a sub-4. At 20 I’m hobbling, with cramps right above both knees.

Things are a little fuzzy after that. I stopped at a medical aid tent twice, they rubbed something on my legs that helped. Becky finds me right near the big Braum’s milk bottle by the gold dome, and I pretty much fall onto her, she supports my weight while I rest for a minute or two before I’m ready to keep going. I kind of shuffle from 19 to 24 before managing a jog at the end. I cross the finish line four hours, forty-five minutes, and forty seconds after I started.

I don’t know what happened. Maybe I could have eaten better the past few months. I could have worn better gear, my shirt got heavy with the sweat. The weather could have been cooler and less humid, but it’s Oklahoma, so maybe it couldn’t have.

But even all those factors combined, I don’t know if they add up to 45 extra minutes. Sometimes it’s not your day.

The Wednesday afterward, I ran 5K, three miles or so. It was bad. I felt like there were swords running down my thighs until the last five minutes, but then I reached the last five minutes and felt okay. Then I did a few more over the next few days. Nine yesterday and felt pretty good.

There’s a tweet I love—can’t find it now, the guy deleted his account—but he was big on NBA Twitter, a Warriors fan. After they lost in the playoffs one year, someone talked about what a disappointing season it had been. But he pushed back, something like: “when the season ends, you don’t have to give back all the fun you had during it. That’s yours to keep.”

I didn’t have a good race. But I had a good training block. I’m a better runner than I was. That’s mine for as long as I can hold onto it.

1. 77 Words About 72 Words

I got a piece in a magazine!

The app challenges I did last year to access the Mars Yard sneaker were structured so that they cultivated obedience and obligation to their creator, the artist Tom Sachs. But he got in trouble a few years earlier for verbal demanding punishing loyalty and mistreating his staff. It’s ironic that this awful flaw in real life becomes a feature in his art. I wrote about it, briefly, for The Drift.

2. 77 More Words About 72 Words

The Sachs piece is in a section of The Drift called “Mentions,” which are “extremely abbreviated reviews.” Part of the reason I decided to format this season of Septology this way—with its 777-word big section and 7 77-word small sections—is to practice writing in that style. I sometimes get tired of counting words in this format, but now I know it’s been worth it. I’ve wanted a byline in The Drift for a long time.

3. Everybody buy Spigen™ screen protectors

The music stopped: “No Device Connected.” That meant my phone had been in the car and now it was not in the car anymore. I pulled a U-turn, threw on my hazards, and grabbed it off the street, where it had been run over. Siri said: “Dialing emergency services. It looks like you’ve been in a crash.” No, Siri, you’ve been in a crash. I’m fine.

I scraped off the crushed glass screen protector. Phone’s working great.

4. The Christians Have Started Using Tools (Part 1)

The new College of St. John The Worker teaches the Great Books and also the trades. “I love the idea that my plumber might have insights into the neoclassicism of the American founding,” one adviser told The New Yorker.

This seems suspiciously self-gratifying, but still worth a try. I see the appeal. At Lightcast, we often lament the lack of trades workers, so I know there’s a need, too.

5. The Christians Have Started Using Tools (Part 2)

The New Mount Carmel Monastery, 50 miles from Cody, Wyoming, is building a massive Gothic chapel with CNC robotic arms, which are also used for manufacturing satellites and surgical instruments. A magazine essay about the chapel compares it to skyscrapers, which replaced cathedrals in the popular imagination of what buildings could be. But while skyscrapers are ontologically vacant, this building of granite and limestone is being built, slowly and by monks’ hands, for the glory of God.

6. Why Technology Exists

Much like how the monks are using advanced technology to build something spiritually significant (instead of yet more technology), I liked this article about “cyberdecks”, which is a fun word for custom-modified computers. I also liked this post about someone who filed down the sharp corners of his laptop because he didn’t like how it felt on his wrists. Technology exists for humans to use; we should adapt it to our needs, not adapt ourselves to its.

7. Budget Tips

When I click on a “budget tips” article online, I do not expect to read anything unique or new, but I did this week! The author is the type of British lad who goes to the pub (I’m picturing Matty Healy if The 1975 never made it), and so besides normal ideas like “get a library card,” he suggests:

1. Steal

13. Student Discount Fraud

14. Dodge Train Fares

16. Stop Doing Cocaine.

Absolute legend. Cheers mate

That's all for this month. Thank you, as always, for reading. I'll see you June 7, which is a Sunday.

Love, Tim