here's to feeling good all the time

Helloooooooo,

Writing to you from the lower bulb of the hourglass. Sand is washing over me. Time is coming.

I am feeling older. For the first time in my life, I can actually feel that I am getting older. Things are starting to ache. I took my first trip ever to the ER (nice people! — Kaiser on Sunset if you’re ever jonesing). Some of our best friends moved to Vegas last year. Another two are now in Berlin. One is (temporarily, thank god) teaching in NorCal.

My clothes are beginning to fade and fray. The mortgage is out there, somewhere, sulking. No—lurking. Hunting.

A month ago my mom unspecifically asked me what was wrong with my teeth. I hit my head a few weeks ago (legs fell asleep while reading about the Oxford English Dictionary on the can in the middle of the night). I have experienced days in a row in which, at every pursuit, I can’t help feeling like an anti-Midas.

Oh, and I got laid off. I’m looking for work. Filling out forms to appallingly overpay for COBRA and then filling out forms for a foundation that may pay for said insurance. I started a L*nkedIn. I will not get any deeper into the job stuff because I love you too much.

But I am also living.

My hands are often covered in ink stains from drawing and lettering. An album cover I designed for my dear Ben Seretan is in the NYT today (congrats, Benzo!!!). An album I worked on for two years is getting mastered.

Shar made a nearly 12-inch-tall cake for our birthdays. I am about to finish the authoritative biography of Thelonious Monk, which—if you were to see this book, you would agree—is an absolute unit. I still, horrifically, sometimes see the sun rise after going dancing.

Finally reunited with our Vegas friends, I won seventy dollars at blackjack (which we proceeded to joyfully pour into a slot machine the next day). One of my oldest friends just came to visit, and we marveled at the Huntington Gardens’ bonsais over some Real Talk. My sister Shreya is about to come back to LA.

I’m here.

So nothing heady today. Just a simple reminder before I head off to watch the Drag Race finale (Team Nymphia) with my beloved that sometimes communal pleasure is enough. Here are some beautiful old California wine labels to put you in the mood for the weekend.

Cheers.