Good morning good morning. Hello hi how are you are you rightly fired up and pissed about Trump’s new slush fund? Does your back inexplicably feel like it’s sunburned even though it hasn’t been exposed to the sun in decades? Are you in the midst of convincing yourself you have the mysterious, ill-understood, maligned Fybromyalgia? Are you ever going to learn to spell Fibromyalgia?

Are you thinking about sponges? Is it your annual time to think about how the sponge is the dirtiest thing in your house and you should really get rid of that sponge? Are you curious if that extends to scrubby things like Scrub Daddies or bamboo brushes? Do you think you should maybe wash your sponge in the dishwasher every single day? You used to be good about that but you let it go. Get back on that.

Fitter. Happier. More Productive.

Oh my god my neck hurts to much. I need to mash it again with the massager. My knock-off Theragun died, though, so I’m only using the manual one. It is a bummer.

To the Android users who could not zoom in on Arthur C Clarke yesterday because the stock Android mail app sucks, I am here to serve:

Just back from the grocery store. For the tenth time or so I tried to explain to Elderly Manager Man that the caffeine free variant of Zevia only comes in six-packs he really can’t get it through his head. He did tell me again that his grandson drinks Zevia, though. Memory is a funny thing. Some people… you go to a restaurant like three times and they remember your order, they remember every person that comes through. Some people no matter how often you talk to them they can’t remember anything. It’s not their fault they didn’t choose to have a poor memory. Just like people didn’t chose to be dumb. Ignorant, sure, ish. But not dumb. People can’t help it. We gotta try and not dislike them for it.

Oh also there is ANOTHER stevia-based soda on the market now. AND it’s organic. They have a 12-back sampler at Harris Teeter of it. I can’t remember the name. It is red. It is $15.99. I may have a dalliance with it once this current Zevia sale is over. I am curious.

Finished Molly Crabapple’s book about the Bund last night, Here Where We Live is our Country. The world needed this book, the Jewish community needed this book. The world will forever have Molly (and Naomi Klein) to thank for reminding the world about the Bund, and the Bund is worth being remembered. The book is not my style, really, from a literary point of view: it is slightly too into revolution, it slightly suffers from Great Man theory and has a predilliction to autobiography that I do not enjoy in my history. It can be a tough read, it’s a little long. But it still needs to exist. It will be one of those books that few read but many reference. It will literally change the world, it already has. It has given countless disaffected young American Jews something to believe in. It has taught me a lot about, well, a lot.

I kinda wanna learn Yiddish. I finally understand why there is a Yiddish and a Hebrew now and what the deal is. Does Duolingo have Yiddish?

Molly closes the book with something I fully have believed my whole life and rarely see spoken: that it is wrong to disparage anyone of any religion or race, whether or not they are in power. That over time, power shifts, power switches. Those without power will gain power, and the shit they talked about opposing groups, back when they had no power, will poison them once they are in power. We see this all the time.

It also made me realize that things I believed to be common sense and widely held beliefs are just… not. That state and religion should be separate. That religion and race are separate. That you can choose your religion. That you can freely come and go from a religion, that having a religion — or no religion — does not give another human or group of humans power over you. That you can’t, like… I don’t know. Proclaim yourself the one true arbiter of a religion, claim dominion over every person in the world who follows that religion, ignore their nationality and fucking draft them into your national army even if they don’t belong to, live in, or want to live in your country or follow your branch of a religion? That is just bonkers. I had no idea that postwar Israel drafted Jews around the world against their will to come in fight in Israel. Wow.

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We are listening to the new Social Distortion this morning, it is called Born to Kill and it is super fun and I have been listening to this band for like 30 years and have never given them enough respect, haven’t seen them play since 1991 and boy they are a good time. It would be fun to play in this band. I bet going to the show would be fun.

I should, like, compile all the lyrics to their songs and print them out in a small chapbook of poetry and read them like a poetry book. I bet that would be hilarious.

Speaking of poetry I learned this week that esteemed poet, Pulizer nominee and winner of the Yale Young Poet Prize Jack Gilbert was a secret pornographer. I appreciate that.

Speaking of poetry, I learned that Simon Armitage, poet laureate of England, has a secret second career as an indie musician and DJ. Actually if I am being honest, I learned that the dude in the band LYR is also the poet laureate of England. It was reversed, the discovery.

Actually, if I am being honest, same thing with Jack Gilbert. In fact I learned that pornographic novelist Tor Kung was, in fact, Jack Gilbert.

Because everyone knows I don’t read poetry.

Unless it is a limted edition, one of one, chapbook of poetry by Mike Ness, lead singer of Social Distortion.

Watched the Google keynote yesterday and my god was it a dystopian nightmare just horrific in every way. A bunch of clueless nerds talking about how they can steal everything from everyone, burn down the planet, and get their computer to buy a dress for them. Sundar showed a very personal search that, he said out loud, a real person made, and then mocked it and used it to demo a new robot overlord, all without a trace of irony. He basically told us they just peek at our searches? And no one batted an eye, no one even noticed. Except Linus Tech Tips, thank you Linus. Sokath his eyes uncovered.

Linus also pointed out it was the least-liked Youtube video of a Google Keynote ever, thank god. I mean, I dunno man, morality aside I feel like as a CEO you should be able to sense the vibe of your customers enough to know that another keynote that just shoves AI into everything is not what your customers are looking for?

They showed a musician using AI to “make a demo.” They called it a demo. It is unclear, exactly, what they would be demonstrating other than a robot can do a thing.

They called the terrifying fake avatars of humans in the videos they made “actors” and the things they did “performances.”

They have 10,000 different product names and it is incomprehensible and I don’t know why they don’t just call it GoogleAI for every god damned thing.

It is clear what is happening. They are moving on, just like the Zionists wanted the Bund to do, just like Republicans want us to do with slavery and stolen land. All of AI is built on stolen land but we pretend it’s not, we’re just supposed to get over it, and look wow I can use my glasses to take a photo then fuck up the photo and make it worse and unreal.

There was this poor, sad guy at the end that was like “but hey also we can use this stuff to cure cancer” and everyone’s like yeah yeah buddy you’re just here as window dressing and I felt really bad for the guy because he is obviously dumb and didn’t know he was selling his soul. Or maybe he’s a saint and he knew he was selling his soul but is doing what it takes to cure cancer. Like Mark Cuban amirite buh duh bump. No seriously though I would probably read that dude’s deathbed confessional. I bet he has a lot on his mind.

Good talks with Jane this morning. “We only have Daddy in the car and no mommy that means you won’t spend the car ride talking about boring adult things.”

“I’m sorry Jane. Mommy and Daddy fell in love because they loved talking to each other about boring adult things so it is hard for us sometimes.”

“That’s okay.”

She is tracking ghosts on a little piece of paper she carries around with her. There are more ghosts at school than at home she says. We think it’s because the ghosts want to keep learning. Instead of cats with financial problems, we are now talking about ghosts with learning ambitions.

I mean I for one am all-in on post-life learning. I think I will haunt Cal Arts.

Got a mix for you today. It’s a good’un. Mostly new, but not all. I have been a fan of Elise Trouw since her teenage viral Youtube days and her new concept album is not getting enough appreciation. It is an album made entirely of things men have said to her. Mind you, now is 27. A lot of these things were said to her when she was in her teenage years, I’ve no doubt.

The new Raye rules, it’s a masterpiece and I hope it wins all the awards at the grammys or grammies or however the hell you spell it.

Cautiously optimistic about the new Gracie Abrams but I am mildly concerned she may have an eating disorder but that is properly inappropriate to say. Dua Saleh is awesome and Emma and I shoulda gone and seen her at Cats Cradle Emma really meant to. I regret that one. Just like I regret not going to Future Islands last night. Love the new Mountain Goats single it is a rocker and it has a killer melody and is catchy AF and part of me wonders if this isn’t all the case because they are putting the album out on their own label for the first time and suddenly they care more if their music sells lol. No way man he is a consummate artist. He would never. There’s a new Arab strap single and it rules. I kinda like the new Kevin Morby but it is not as manically depressed as the last one so, you know. Less suited to my personal tastes.

Until tomorrow, fine friends. Thank you for reading. You guys are swell.