Howdy-ho, kids! God, remember the pure joy of that first South Park viral video? When internet Nazis were properly underground and there was no social media except Instant Messenger? The best, the best.

Just back from the grocery store. Big morning. There was a BOGO on BJs, Zevia is on sale $4.99 a six pack and I spent $12 on a block of Murray’s Parmesan cheese.

There was a little old lady who couldn’t reach her incredibly sugary cereal, a special flavor of Fruit Loops, and I got three boxes off the shelf for her so I am basically a saint all day already.

It occurred to me that the in-store Starbucks might sell those breakfast sandwiches. I briefly considered becoming a Starbucks Person. I could tapp on the app and order my sandwich while waiting at the School with Jane, and it could be there hot and ready when I get to the store. But then I remembered I tried those Starbucks breakfast sandwhiches ones, at the Starbucks at Bush and Grant in SF in 2008 or so, when they first came out, and they were not very good. I’m sure they haven’t changed a bit.

Perhaps the thing I miss most from living in cities is bodegas and breakfast bagels. I dream of starting a bodega here, somewhere. Or even one of those carts they have in Fairbanks where you can get coffee and a breakfast sandwich. BAGELS I MISS BAGELS SO MUCH. Even mediocre bagels I am not that picky.

Had a show last night, didn’t go. I am so lazy when there are not other people involved. It’s not that I’m embarrassed to go to shows alone or anything it’s just less fun and much harder to motivate, doubly compounded by having to drive there and not drink. Shows are boring alone, driving and sober, what can I say. I mean, they’re not boring, not the music, not the performance, but everything else kind of is. I have now done this three times this year and I am not proud of it. Meanwhile I am looking up all the shows in Boston that I can go to while I’m there next week and the week after and then the last week in April and I discovered lots more fun shows to go to, HOPEFULLY WITH FRIENDS, including one of the three I missed here, so that will be fun. Maybe. We will see.

Join the GMHHAY slack! Reply to this email and ask for an invite if you’re a human who likes chatting with other humans about topics such as these within!

Listening to Bartees Strange this morning, musical prodigy from Baltimore, should be way bigger than he is, chameleon of musical styles, amazing songwriter. Bought two of his records on Bandcamp Friday in a bundle I am now realizing might have been the “Boy Bundle,” as they are entitled Say Goodbye to Pretty Boy and Magic Boy. I am listening to the former, which includes two of his absolute greatest songs, “Mr. November” and “A Reasonable Man (I Don’t Mind).” Also these albums may be EPs. Who can tell these days.

Anyway, this guy rules.

Politics item #1: Around 2 PM Swiss time, which is right now ish, the “Swiss Canton of Vaud” is voting on whether to remove the Union of European Football Associations’ tax-exempt status due to their continued including of the Israeli Football Association as a member. Yes, weirdly Israel is a member of the European Football Association shrug text emoji. This is a campaign that has been in the works for a long time and is a fairly clever method of applying continued pressure on Israel for its ongoing, shall we say, actions in Gaza.

I can, of course, think of another country that could use some sort of sports-based sanctions for their bellicosity. We definitely don’t deserve the World Cup over here this year. They should take it away from us this is going to be a shitshow.

Politics item #2: Illinois primary today, so we get to see if Kat Abughazeleh wins her highly contested primary. Boy Republicans sure do not like Kat Abughazeleh and her efficacy. Can’t have Democrats who actually want to fight who actually know how to use social media. The polling has been light, and very close. She has generally been behind, but within striking distance. It could go either way. Whatever happens, a Democratic party with half a brain would find a place for this kind of energy and smarts within their party.

Do I have more politics stuff for you today? I don’t know, man. I find myself… um… not being rational, wishing for it to all burn down, wishing oil goes to $200 a barrel, even though I know this is bad. I find myself rooting for bad guys viscerally even though they are bad and I do not like them. I have, somewhat, barely but perceptibly, curtailed my doomscrolling a bit and it has helped my mental state a bit but then when you dip back in you’re like “my god, this world is freakin insane.” Normies do not grasp the crazy shit Trump says on a regular basis, the crazy shit he said about Cuba yesterday, like it didn’t make any news anywhere unless you’re a doomscrolling freak.

So, hey, let’s just skip that.

Been reading Apple in China by Patrick McGee and my god is it depressing. Apple didn’t go to China because it was where the good cheap manufacturing was, Apple made China. Apple made Foxconn. Apple did it all, man. Tim Cook pretty much made China. Fucking crazy shit, this book, and I am something of a student of Apple. No book like this one before in its depth and breadth of reporting, really is extraordinary, and I am only now arriving at Xi, haven’t gotten to the Uighars yet, haven’t gotten to Apple’s capitulation on data infrastructure. They are so completely fucked, Apple. They will never leave China, they’ll never be able to. There’s also a bit of the “Nasa forgetting how to make the Saturn V” going on, the army of engineers and PMs who got Apple into China are old and retiring out and it is quite arguable the entire organization does not possess the skill to do this again in another country, even if there were another country to send manufacturing to.

I made a passing comment on Bluesky a month or two ago how Apple used to be this company known for its better software, but had shitty hardware, and now that is completely inverted. This is Tim Cook’s legacy. These slave-built machines (built mostly by hand! The automation is a myth!) are gorgeous, perfect, amazing. Meanwhile the software suffers and slides. Is there a single engineer in the world’s most powerful company working on Preview.app? Or even fucking Mail?

Every year we hear about how Apple’s going to do another Snow Leopard — one of their most popular OS releases ever, owing to its sole focus on performance enhancements and bug fixes. It has been sixteen years, and despite all the talk, despite the success, they’ve never done another Snow Leopard. Bugs last years, bugs last decades. I wonder how old the oldest bug ticket is in Apple’s bug tracker. I am willing to wager it’s over ten years old.

All so they can keep propping up China.

It’s so depressing.

There’s that old man in the first Tron. Seemed to be a co-founder of Flynn’s, though his role lost in the subsequent sequel lore. Not a Dillinger or a Flynn. Walter Gibbs, Wikipedia tells me. He’s the founder of ENCOM, not Flynn. Feels like that got retconned.

Anyway, evil Dillinger is telling him about how ENCOM isn’t the company that this guy started in their garage anymore.

And the old guy says “Sometimes I wish it were.”

And Dillinger says “That can be arranged, Walter.”

Even though I was there, as LCD Soundsystem says, when the iPhone was released, sometimes — shit, most of the time these days — I wish it wasn’t. Most of the time, I wish Apple was still a Mac company. I mean of course it’s impossible to comprehend what a Mac would be like without the revenue and resources of the iPhone. And without the Faustian bargain of China. But, I mean… It wasn’t terrible back then? And they could still have done Apple Silicon with Sruji and TSMC no China there I don’t think.

Sigh. Sad.

It’s St. Patrick’s day and Jane is wearing green and brought a weird green cat plushie to school I feel like I’ve never seen. Also for the first time ever, she needed to pee in the car while we were waiting for her to be let into school, had to wait seven minutes. Now that it’s happened, it’s weird to me that hasn’t ever happened before.

We were kind of freezing because it’s 32 degrees WTF and my Truck’s heater is intermittently breaking and I am pretty pissed about it. Alas.

But we managed.

I did full bedtime last night, Emma had some work. Gave Jane the choice between Daddy School and DJDP and she chose the dance party. It was a good time. Very acrobatic. Only Taylor Swift, though, my Youtube has forgotten all of the Daddy Jane Dance Party hits. Had to scramble. Karma is still a banger. Someone needs to write a doctoral thesis on Taylor’s eye makeup it really is a trip to watch it evolve through the years.

I don’t have a playlist for you today, but my friend Keith just mentioned Big Monster Fish Hook, the Boston-based 90’s band that nearly signed to 4AD and had us all enthralled. I miss them so much. Annie and I did the cover, our long-lost friends Andrew and Noah were the record label, Lisa the singer stayed at our house for a few weeks right after the album came out. Lost track of her, miss her, she was great. Had a friend named Thaïs. Great name. Ooof nostalgia burn. We probably saw this band live 20 times in the span of a year. Absolutely obsessed. Lisa’s voice was insane.

They are barely on the internet. A few of the tracks on YouTube, though. So here is one.

Talk to you tomorrow, fine friends.